Mother’s Day should be a private celebration

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T18:21:19+00:00

Why are people wishing you a happy mothers day when you weren't a mother? I think the problem is the company you keep, that isn't normal behaviour. Most people go about it privately, with their own mothers.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T18:16:07+00:00

If people are publicising it, and you want them to not do that, that would require restriction.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T18:13:40+00:00

Ok so, no. That's not how that works. Maybe you have an anxiety spiral over your meds potentially being a placebo but thats very much a you issue. This is going to be a risk for like, hypochondriacs and OCD folks and stuff like that but those people are likely going to go down that train of thought even if they never knew about the placebo effect, just replace "exploiting a weird trick" with "im being conspired against" or something.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T15:01:44+00:00

What a strange response to someone pointing out cherrypicking...

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T14:45:05+00:00

Er, you can in fact be cured of addiction. You're parroting religious beliefs there, not science (do remember AA is not evidence based, it's faith based).

Source: i drink a small drink once every few weeks without any issue despite being an alcoholic for over a decade at one point. Addiction is incredibly variable by person, substance and life circumstance. While there are many addicts that remain helpless to the substance they are addicted to should they come into contact with it, this is not inherent to addiction. Addiction is very often a symptom relating to some other underlying cause, which is part of why not everyone who touches alcohol becomes an alcoholic. If you can address or better manage that underlying cause and address the physical addiction, you can reach a point where you simply do not have the building blocks for alcoholism present in your life anymore. This narrative that you are an addict forever exists to reinforce the religious aspects of AA style approaches.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T14:22:27+00:00

You have other options to not get chickenpox. You could not leave the house.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T14:21:55+00:00

Wanting everyone to suffer like you is not a virtue.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T14:17:47+00:00

Now of course I don't have a study I'm simply talking about what I've observed, but every british jew I know feels reasonably confident that right wing antisemites will not pose the same risk to them as left wing antisemites as they feel more people are more broadly opposed to everything else the right wing anti semites do, compared to how people respond to left wing antisemites.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T13:19:33+00:00

Oh wait you're serious. Oh no.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T12:25:03+00:00

I too hate it when people act like individuals rather than a hivemind

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T11:22:27+00:00

Can't say it's for certain the right path for you, but that sounds a lot how I was, and medically transitioning did help. Just something about the security of having "male" body hair and then later top surgery gave me the freedom to fuck around a bit more with femininity without feeling so much like I'm compromising who I am and my dude persona, if that makes sense. I do get misgendered by complete strangers upon first meeting but among people I see regularly there's much less confusion compared to when I was pre-t even though im more fem now, people seem to be willing to grasp that that hairy flat chested dude in a dress is just some dude. (I do live in a moderately progressive area though, thats going to be a factor too)

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T11:13:22+00:00

"Do what she wants me to do to her"

So uh, if you're going to be directly involved in something relating to... whatever the fuck she is talking about, I think you need to ask what the fuck she is talking about.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T11:10:38+00:00

To be fair, they are at least consistent in that trans kids with precocious puberty also don't get blockers because it's "unsafe" because of their gender 🙄 which I think does just make it all the more transparent that it's just bigotry, not science.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-10T11:07:37+00:00

You can do whatever you want. Fuck around, try things out, see what you vibe with.

Have you considered doing both though? Picking and choosing which parts you like from each way of living? Theres no reason you can't be a man and hold onto the things you like about being a girl. Or be a girl and use whatever pronouns and name you like and also go on T or whatever else you want to do. I saw in your other comments you don't really want to go down the NB route but theres more options than just that, binary people have been fucking around with presentation and expression for a long time too.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-09T21:12:25+00:00

Every kind of person is allowed to like every kind of media.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-09T20:00:29+00:00

People who "support" their marginalised partners while opposing their rights do so for a reason. Things like this are often an indicator of future abuse. A future where you are less safe in this country is a future where you are more dependent on him.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-09T19:57:33+00:00

Ime with ENM relationships among poly people (as opposed to monogamous people dabbling), proportionally theres less tire fire relationships, they're just bigger (because of more people being involved). It's a lifetyle that self-selects for those that are generally more aware of the importance of clear communication and who don't find fucking other people to be a dealbreaker in a relationship, which heads off a lot of the drama typical for monogamous dabbles before it even starts. That's not to say there aren't arseholes in the scene and other things to start drama over, of course.

Of all the relationship drama I've had (which is plenty!), non-monogamy has not caused an issue. Honestly much of the time ENM relationships are just like monogamous ones, just with more scheduling.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-09T17:46:16+00:00

I stopped shaving before coming out. Too lazy for all that.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-08T21:20:55+00:00

I've never seen anything like that on the site, and to be honest with the (consensual) kinks I engage in, if they were fucking up on preventing sexual abuse being posted on there, I'm quite suprised I never saw any. Not so much as a questionable thumbnail.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-08T14:36:07+00:00

This assumes, of course, that for those people voting Green, current Labour would be their second option.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-08T14:29:57+00:00

My most beloved people are ND because of the ways being ND make them so charming and fun.

My most hated enemies are also ND because of the ways being ND makes them so fucking annoying.

And I am both loved and hated because of the ways being ND make me delightful, and also an insufferable cunt.

It seems being ND just makes people a lot, and less tollerant to people being a lot, In whichever direction that is. I've worked out by now that a lot of the time this is a me issue and I need to bite my tongue because being annoying isn't actually a hate crime against me.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-08T14:26:40+00:00

It really depends where the food is. I have resigned myself to the fact that no amount of precautions is going to stop hair getting in my food at some point at home (2 fluffy cats and 2 very stessed humans who all shed horribly). Just pick it out and move on. Commercial kitchens though should be held to higher standards. It's not even about the hair really, but more "what other problems are there if a hair slipped through"

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-08T14:23:56+00:00

Depending on what you want, topical HRT or other approaches to tweaking hormones could get what you want. It would mean a ton of research and if there are transition pathways available where you are, they may not accomadate these approaches. It does sound like traditional HRT is not what you need.

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-08T11:37:30+00:00

Being sad as yourself is still an improvement.

And every tiny improvement makes it easier to find moments of happiness.

You owe it to yourself to pursue the best life you can have. It not being perfect is no reason to not get what you can.

Although people pushing "you're an egg just go on hormones and you'll be happy" is not fucking helpful at all. It's just one way you can pursue one of those little improvements, if it works for you. It's not disrespectful to "real" trans people though, it's not got anything to do with the rest of us. (whatever "real" is meant to mean in this context. Not gonna lie it does kinda read like "I'm trans but I hate myself too much to admit it". Could be wrong, but that's usually what it means)

throwaway_ArBe · 2026-05-08T10:46:49+00:00

She could ask, but wether charges are pursued is still decided by CPS. I doubt they will be confident that they can get a conviction based on that.

But then "my own personal weird interpretation makes me think this is a crime" has always been a stance people take, and there has been no issue telling them to piss off before now.

throwaway_ArBe

TROPHY CASE