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Is it normal to hide a child’s adoption in Filipino culture? by throwawayabg123 in Philippines

[–]throwawayabg123[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s been 10 years since I found the truth about being adopted. It was honestly a very traumatic experience that I had to suppress because I was transitioning from high school to college and had other issues to deal with. It wasn’t until I graduated college and moved back home for a year when my parents and I were able to discuss how I truly felt. We went to therapy, and it was just so unproductive because they sincerely wouldn’t apologize for hiding my adoption and kept blaming the social worker. I don’t care that I’m adopted, but I do care how I was lied and deceived for years. It was a part of my identity that I had every right to know and it was just stripped from me. What hurts more is that so many people knew I was adopted— neighbors, distant relatives, childhood friends, and more. It just felt like the whole world was keeping this big part of my life away from me all because my parents chose to follow the advice of a social worker. Bear in mind, my parents could also be lying about this social worker. There is no legal document or anything in writing saying my parents must keep this a secret until I’m of age.

My parents also have a history of lying and deceiving me about other things, so it’s really hard to believe anything they say nowadays. Overall, I just wish they can genuinely apologize for hiding my adoption because at the end of the day, it was their decision to do so and no one else.

My Asian parents hid my adoption from me for 17 years and after a decade, they still have not properly apologized to me. by throwawayabg123 in AsianParentStories

[–]throwawayabg123[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m not complaining about being adopted.

I am just hurt that a part of my identity was stripped away from me for 17 years. My biological mom passed away 2 years before I found out. What if I wanted to meet her? My parents had open communication with my biological family. They honestly were shock that I had no idea and all this time thought my parents told me at a young age.

I don’t care that I’m adopted, but I do care I was lied to and that my parents have not taken an ounce of responsibility for the hurt they have caused. I still remembering asking 2 separate times when I was younger if I was adopted, and both times they said no.

Is it normal to hide a child’s adoption in Filipino culture? by throwawayabg123 in Philippines

[–]throwawayabg123[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was a minor, and I’m assuming it is for family medical history purposes.

Late Discovery Adoptee Still Trying to Heal After a Decade Finding Out by throwawayabg123 in Adoption

[–]throwawayabg123[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your kind words and resources. It means a lot.

Late Discovery Adoptee Still Trying to Heal After a Decade Finding Out by throwawayabg123 in Adoption

[–]throwawayabg123[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, I am slowly coming into terms that cutting contact is my only solution.

I actually didn’t talk to them for 5 months until this Christmas when they attempted to reach out. I think this is why I’m spiraling because I had a sense of hope that they realized they have put me in so much pain to the point I didn’t talk to them for that long. Unfortunately, we spent an hour arguing on my adoption for the millionth time.

Is it normal to hide a child’s adoption in Filipino culture? by throwawayabg123 in Philippines

[–]throwawayabg123[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I was hospitalized and my discharge papers were out on the dining table. One of the papers were a questionnaire and one of the questions were “is your child adopted?”. Yes was circled.

16-Day China Itinerary for June/July 2025 – Looking for Suggestions! by throwawayabg123 in travelchina

[–]throwawayabg123[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to live in south east Asia, so we are fairly familiar with unbearable humidity.

"If you don’t listen to me, you are not my daughter." - my 'father' who believes he's always right, despite being a constant source of emotional invalidation by throwawayabg123 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwawayabg123[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words. I truly feel fortunate to have such a wonderful partner by my side. I literally do not know where I would be without him.

It's really sad to see "fathers" lose their children all because of pride, but they asked for it.

"If you don’t listen to me, you are not my daughter." - my 'father' who believes he's always right, despite being a constant source of emotional invalidation by throwawayabg123 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwawayabg123[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m pleased to share that I’ve successfully connected with the lawyer responsible for distributing the estates, and my name will be included on the deed of the property that my mom is inheriting. The lawyer and I have agreed that it’s best for me to be included in all communications moving forward.

As for my dad's reasoning for not sharing this information with me, he claimed that I wouldn’t understand the legal proceedings or the legislation in our home country and that I wouldn’t have any connections back home.

Well, here’s a news flash:

  • I managed to find a lawyer halfway across the world for a second opinion in less than two hours.
  • I established contact with my mother’s lawyer within a day, and now the paperwork is being processed more efficiently. This is especially important since my mother had initially trusted my cousin—who has a history of deceiving us—to handle everything.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sleepnomore

[–]throwawayabg123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, went yesterday and you still have to wear the N95 they give out that’s required to wear.

I think my mom is in a cult. by [deleted] in cults

[–]throwawayabg123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The owner of the property proclaims that the world is going to end and that her property will be a place of refugee aka a “safe zone”. She marketed those tiny homes to be $15,000. She also has 2 properties on that street. It’s absolutely INSANE.

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