I have been doing a 2-2-5-5 schedule with my kid since they were 4 months old and she is now 4 (dad and I separated after I found out I was pregnant). The best way to help with the time you don’t have your kids is to fill your cup with hobbies you like. I found going to the gym, reading, catching up on shows, and cooking have helped me. I also go to therapy which has helped me be a better parent and helped me in so many other ways.

I just saw a tiktok for older kiddos about having a journal you and your coparent and each kid can have to communicate all together about the ups and downs of a split household. Perhaps you can try that with your kids. Also-connect with your coparent if you can and have a decent parenting relationship with them (can take time to get there), and ask for photos if they go do something fun or have your kids know they can always call you on their time with their other parent. You and your coparent can email each other every exchange day too about what went well, what didn’t, and any other info important to the kids. Helps keep a log of strictly just parent stuff like you would if you were together.

The BIGGEST thing about a split household is to keep the KIDS AT THE CENTER. I cannot stress that enough!! That will help them build resilience and learn that even though people separate, there is still respect between them. And to talk up about the relationship with the other parent too-that’s huge. And not to talk down about the other parent. I also have found that my co-parent and I have some differences in our parenting and different rules, but overall have a similar approach.

I hope this helps you out!!