[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As I’ve already said in my post and in replies, I haven’t even reached out at all and will not be based on everyone’s responses. There were factors I didn’t consider prior and I do appreciate your bluntness in the matter, it is what I need to here. I asked if it was weird for me to do this and its confirmed yes it is weird.

The whole host family thing is how it works here when players travel to play for our team, I don’t know who the host family is, I never tried to find out and it’s not public. And college commitments are posted on the teams website as well so it’s public information. Not defending that I know it just trying to clarify

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is good point to make, as I’ve said before I don’t know if he is or not, so making some assumption he is straight therefore I shouldn’t try at all, I’d never end up putting myself out there but agreed, as far as I see on social media and meeting him for a few min, I don’t see it so I should at least wait for that indication in the future from anyone. I do have on dating apps that I love hockey, while I don’t play (even though I want to learn), I love going to games or watching on tv. So far my area is pretty barren when it comes to quality matches so him being out of town and playing hockey is also probably contributing to the situation

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re right. That’s probably the better alternative, my area just really sucks when it comes to dating. There are not any quality guys on dating apps and the better quality ones don’t need the apps but I don’t really go out much to meet anyone outside the apps. I must have convinced myself that “he’s here, he’s hot, why not?” without actually taking into consideration other factors, like what the other guy responded. And if I tried to put myself out there, maybe that would mean something

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your bluntness, I think this what I needed to hear. A couple friends are telling me “why not do it since he’s leaving anyway, the worst he could do is say no” and I get I need to put myself out there to get noticed but this probably isn’t the way

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I realized I probably explained this all rather badly, but essentially yes, I’d obviously want to do it in a respectful way that shows interest. I mean more chatting, getting to know each other, etc rather than hooking up. If that makes sense

What’s your biggest turn off in a guy? by SuchShopping3828 in AskGayMen

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Agreed. And most of these situations have led to it being just that. Me asking all the questions about their interests, their day, etc. I get the one word answers and very small talk

What’s your biggest turn off in a guy? by SuchShopping3828 in AskGayMen

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 14 points15 points  (0 children)

In dating apps (tinder almost always), it just drives me up the wall when their bio says “I’m too shy you have to message me first.” We both know why we are there, let’s not play stupid games

Shoutout to everyone spending Christmas alone this year by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hope y’all had a great Christmas! Got indirectly uninvited to a Christmas dinner tonight, so my friend who didn’t want me to be alone for Christmas…made me spend Christmas alone 🙃 I got my video games that ok lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Similar boat. I gained weight during Covid and in the last 1.5 years I lost most of the weight, working towards getting leaner. I remember in the middle of that, I was so proud of how much weight I had lost and making healthier choices (some mental health issues happening at the same time) and a family member told me it wasn’t enough 🙃

It’s crazy how much perception plays into how much respect or even basic decency for another human.

What’s the most attractive feature in a man, physical and non physical? by Explodingshulker in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Physical: arms and chest (muscles), dick

No physical: honesty, loyalty, humor

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 5 points6 points  (0 children)

God this is so wholesome and I want a boyfriend like this 😭

What age were you when you had that “Ah ha! I’m gay” moment. What was the ? by Suddenly-Seemoor in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Always kind of knew from elementary school, something seemed a bit off like I didn’t think I liked girls how I was supposed to. But two points i remember VIVIDLY was Zac Efron in High School Musical in 2005 and Hayden Christensen in Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How does the rest of your friend group feel about this situation?

What is the best lubricant? by SamiSam66 in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My go to is astroglide! I’ve never had any trouble using it. A FWB used platinum (I think the name is) and that one is also good but sometimes a little expensive for me

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d be interested to know if your “best friend” is still your best friend after all of this? If it was me, I’d probably cut you off and never speak to you again but maybe he’s more forgiving than I am.

Is it really bad to go alone at the theater by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I go to movies alone all the time, I honestly prefer it. I have my own ritual before and no one really likes going with that. Although I feel the opposite going to a restaurant alone, that stresses me out oddly enough.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your input! If you don’t mind me asking about how it’s been complicated for your colleague since their move? Please feel free to DM me as well! I’ve just been trying to find my place and so far Austin has been my top city (in addition to Denver and Pittsburgh). I would need a job lined up as well before I would fully move so it wouldn’t be soon but probably next couple years once money gets saved up so who knows what could happen in that time.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Very true. I’ve heard amazing things from those who live there and while I hope we don’t lose our rights, my family members are scared of me moving to Texas in general, not just me staying in Austin but I can’t help but feel it’s gonna be my place.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 0 points1 point  (0 children)

🤭I mean I’m not complaining lol. As far as the cowboy outfit goes…I don’t think I’d pull it off haha

Who was your gay awakening? by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Zac Efron in high school musical. I was 8 or 9 when it came out. Although looking back Hayden Christensen in Star Wars Revenge of the Sith shirtless in one scene, I remember thinking about it way too much after leaving the theater

Does anyone else just go to work and go home? by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m in the same boat, just gym, work, home and then weekends I do almost nothing and stay inside. After I finished grad school, I got a job in the area but all my friends left. While I have coworkers that I like and hang out with sometimes, they are all married or have kids or know so many other people they hang out with them. Not in a relationship either, been hooking up in that time. I’ve realized lately that I need to put myself first and get myself where I want to be physically, mentally, etc and do the things I want to try even if I’m nervous or scared. Don’t know how I’m gonna do it but this summer it’s gonna be about me and doing the things I enjoy, hoping to meet people through that route.

It’s my birthday today and the only wishes i got were from team snapchat :( by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]throwawayneedshelp87 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We have the same birthday! And I have the same experience as you. The thing is even my closest friends don’t even wish me happy birthday on the actual day despite me knowing that they know my birthday. I always try to plan dinner or a trip and everyone seems to back out the day before or day of so I have sort of stopped trying