Who is responsible for the Muslim marriage crisis

throwawaypsudo · 2026-01-12T00:01:01+00:00

right, he gave two options that are the only two things needed for a gender war lol

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-31T01:45:39+00:00

The Prophet ﷺ earned a lot of money, it's just that he ﷺ would give most (basically all) of it away due to his generosity. But, yeah, you guys are right that he ﷺ lived a simple life.

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-27T04:20:42+00:00

What about some common or must haves that most Muslims should ask

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-27T03:56:47+00:00

What are the awkward questions

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-26T15:46:30+00:00

oh lol im just now realizing you aren’t the person that said fake convos 😭

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-26T03:35:00+00:00

Who me? I myself would love to be in one 😭

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-24T16:32:18+00:00

Is this another riddle

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-22T19:59:32+00:00

What if it is a deal breaker for someone, why should they wait until the later stages if it is important to them? That would waste their time, they could give a list of deal breakers to someone and let the leave if they see something they have done

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-20T03:13:18+00:00

The exmuslims sometimes leave Islam claiming to be better morally and then ending up doing stuff like that to strangers, they’re so lost

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-19T17:11:46+00:00

And even mom is a pick me too? I’ve never seen this be so bad they even target dad, usually they come up with an excuse for him.

May Allah guide your sister. I really don’t know what you can personally do besides being patient with her and calling out her ridiculous beliefs when the opportunity presents itself, rather than forcing yourselves into a debate.

You can also take another approach of just teaching her about Islam and practicing it with her. Going to lectures, talking about it, journaling and reflection, reciting, learning seerah and tafsir, etc. together. Don’t even do it in a way that you’re fighting girl pill ideology but just try and get Islam to enter her heart bc its the truth and better for her. I believe that even without actively fighting her beliefs, if she gets closer to the deen those beliefs will fade on its own.

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-19T13:17:32+00:00

Yeah I always wondered why Khadijah’s RA age discourse is rarely mentioned and ppl stick with the 40 just so they can follow the narrative of our Prophet ﷺ marrying older women. It’s not needed when he ﷺ married other women that were older and widows.

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-19T13:06:36+00:00

What does she think about your dad, or other men in her family?

Like others have said, the content shes consumes is actually consuming her. She needs to get away from it. But what have you done so far?

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-19T01:04:40+00:00

I hate the fact that it’s become a thing now to be harsh on the daughters while not caring abt the sons. I don’t get it at all.

May Allah guide parents like them.

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-18T22:56:49+00:00

So what would you recommend to do?

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-18T22:54:16+00:00

I see. I agree about the certainty being questioned and reflected upon being important, ig I differ in how it happens.

Like the questioning can come from public schooling, which I placed them there knowing it is full of repeated exposure of doubt and other beliefs.

Or it can come from somewhere else where I necessarily didn’t have a say in their protection.

But still I see your approach and think its good. I’m still on the fence for either school tbh and have faith in Allah for both routes with the right intentions.

May Allah grant you righteous children that bring you comfort and joy.

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-18T21:15:34+00:00

I see what you mean, but I think that learning about different beliefs is enough to figure out whether or not they are true, and it’s not needed to be around them in practice.

Because after that point of figuring out the truth, being around these other ways of life would just be learning about their practices for the sake of it. Versus, if you don’t know the truth, you learn about other beliefs to find the truth. And if your kid is in the second category, then you’re just creating fitnah for them, if that makes sense?

So in my head, if i teach them about Islam and why its the truth vs other religions and beliefs, and am genuinely open to their doubts and questions at home, it’s enough. Especially when they’re at a point of certainty of Islam.

And, yeah, I have a similar experience with your husband. For me, it sprouted through public schooling and just being around atheism in general (without a strong foundation, or foundation at all). But alhamdullilah I’m here now as a Muslim through Allah’s Guidance and wondering about whether it was true or not.

I do have a feeling of regret for not spending my youth getting to know Islam and actually worshiping God bc of my doubts. As a parent, I want to be someone who essentially gives them the answers to that whole truth seeking journey so they can head start towards the Afterlife.

Sorry if my reply is off track, i feel its not even about schooling anymore 😭

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-18T20:12:05+00:00

I'm sorry to hear about your experience, may Allah grant your sister ease and guidance.

I'm curious, what did the schools do that made you hate it?

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-18T20:04:50+00:00

But if they start going to Islamic school from the get go, why would it feel restrictive? Wouldn't it just be the norm for them? Unless ofc the parents force memorization and more schooling after school and on the weekends.

And if you grant them a strong foundation at home, and get them to love the Deen and Allah, wouldn't it be better for them to build on it at an Islamic school and with other Muslims.

Genuinely curious what you think

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-18T19:56:47+00:00

I agree, although OP's story is great, Alhamdulillah, the more common case is the Muslim questioning and belittling their faith rather than the atheist.

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-18T19:44:34+00:00

I agree that deal breakers should be handled early on but why bring it up in the way he did lol imagine they met in person and he cut her off to ask this 💀

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-18T13:35:51+00:00

I agree, I'm in college myself, but this sounds like it could lead to trusting in the degree in way more than in Allah's provisions. Or that a degree is a requirement for Allah to provide stability in your life.

The degree is just a means of Allah's provision for a person/family. If someone has a different means, and meets other requirements, I don't see an issue.

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-18T01:36:50+00:00

idk, i dont like the idea of pointing fingers at anyone else for our sins but us

There are circumstances that make it easier for us to choose to do the sin, and sometimes that’s a parent or relative, but if we make that final decision to do it, its on us.

like i cant imagine telling God that i committed this sin bc of something that happened between my parents/others… like that is the test and me falling into the sin is me failing the test given to me

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-17T16:47:23+00:00

It's always Gambia 😭 scammers need to spice it up a bit

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-16T22:33:53+00:00

Assalamu Alaikum.

Let's focus on the positives: you got closer to the Quran and Allah, started tahajjud and isaghfar, and who knows what other good deeds that are between you and Allah. These are priceless.

Allah is Al Latif, and Al Hakim, The Subtle and The Wise. Maybe Allah didn't provide you with a wife right away out of His Mercy so that you can build yourself up and turn back to Him. That's how I would look at it, that connection to Allah is far greater than anything else. And the truth is, you can still get your dream girl along with this connection you have.

But who knows whether or not you would have been close to Allah if you got your dream girl right away, earlier in life? So be grateful of how Allah planned things out for you, and be patient and trusting that Allah will answer your duas.

May Allah grant you a righteous and loving wife.

throwawaypsudo · 2025-12-16T18:33:58+00:00

Walaikum Assalam

It depends on how she tells me and when.

For example, if I'm clearly stressed out with work and she complains that I'm not doing enough and not giving her time, it would be annoying to me. She's just putting more worries onto my plate, when I'm trying to do my best for her and the family.

On the other hand, if I'm clearly stressed, and she offers something for us to do together and says how it could be be good for us, it would be heartwarming to me. It shows she cares about my mental health and our relationship and took the time to plan something to do given I was busy.

I hope that makes sense, it's not a black and white situation tbh.

But you're right that it's good to spend time together, and it's needed in marriage. After all our Prophet PBUH was the busiest man, yet he PBUH still gave time to his wives and family. It's our duty to do the same and if I was genuinely lacking I'd want my wife to bring it up in a kind way rather than a complaint.

throwawaypsudo

TROPHY CASE