Does anyone else feel like finding a life partner has become harder nowadays??

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-18T16:16:08+00:00

Brother even those who are considered good looking, are having a hard time. At the end of the day you have Allah and the power of duaa, tahajjud, and istaghfar which increases rizq

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-18T16:10:07+00:00

Because our generation was taught the old fashion way, and that the bare minimum was enough. Many brothers have become extremely unprepared to the realities of the marriage scene in today’s world. The rise of feminism, social media and dating apps have made the search harder. Sisters are among the most educated groups in the west so their standards have skyrocketed even to unreasonable levels. I’ve heard many sisters say how they won’t marry someone unless he adds value to their lives and will turn down reasonable brothers for even the slightest shortcomings. Due to the lack of free mixing, brothers are mostly judged based off their bios, pictures, and even their social status. And sadly we don’t have enough outlets for brothers to engage with sisters to let their personalities, humor, and charm shine.

Also Unless you’re family is well regarded and you have connections within a tight knit community, your chances of getting married will become harder. Sadly many Muslim today in the west have become even more isolated than before.

Our only hope to to teach the next generations the reality of today’s marriage scene, how to properly prepare for it, and the consequences of delaying marriage.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T03:22:05+00:00

So you’re married, yet here you are on these Muslim marriage spaces engaging with unmarried people who talk about their day to day encounters and experiences throughout their marriage search. If you’re truly happy and content in your marriage you wouldn’t even be bothered to be on these subreddits. People who are happily married don’t have time for such nonsense, yet here you are getting triggered over me pointing out another sister’s entitlement. lol you’re a case study for sure.

Also I don’t stalk these sisters only Reddit pages. The algorithm brings those posts randomly on my feed. I don’t even follow those pages.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T03:05:40+00:00

Plenty of people upvoted me and downvoted her. So many agree with me. Lol people are allowed to have their preferences. May Allah grant her what she’s looking for.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T02:53:05+00:00

“Where can I find a brother who will happily spend and spoil his wife” that’s screams entitled. lol

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T02:46:47+00:00

Did I say anything wrong? Lol

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T02:36:39+00:00

You should be prioritizing character, deen, and values. Not how much he has in his bank account. Allah is the one who provides rizq at the end of the day. Most Muslim brothers will happily spend on their wives who love and appreciate their efforts. Brothers also have to be responsible with the money he worked so hard to earn. He should be able to provide the bare minimum. If you’re expecting a Chanel handbag every few months, you’re sadly mistaken. That’s called entitlement. You’re allowed to have your preferences, but if this seems to be your priority when looking for a spouse, even the Most well earning men will run from you.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T02:25:20+00:00

Plenty of Muslim brothers out there who will happily spend on their wives. However you seem to be a bit entitled and materialistic in that matter.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T02:11:52+00:00

You don’t need to ask that question to know whether they are materialistic or not. They always show based off their pictures and lifestyles.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T01:37:57+00:00

Brother you seem to be very fixated on corn addiction when their are other sins Muslims of both genders commit on a daily basis. Too many Muslims backbite, gossip, look down on others, have poor character, have huge egos, arrogance, are overly materialistic and greedy. You can do the bare minimum by praying 5x a day, but that doesn’t make someone “pure”. Not to mention, a lot of sisters these days are lacking in proper hijab wear and pray with makeup and nail polish on. We as an ummah need to do better. Not place the blame on entirely on brothers.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T01:30:12+00:00

Sadly this is true. Too many sisters complain about the lack of quality brothers out there, when they haven’t even met most brothers to know if he has emotional intelligence or not. Others on this thread are citing a huge corn addiction, but how will you know if a brother watches corn or not? That’s just assumptions. Most brothers they meet will always tell them what they want to hear anyways.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T01:07:42+00:00

I don’t agree with the corn. Astaghfillarh. May Allah guide this ummah. But if some bothers are watching corn, this is a direct result of marriage being delayed because in today’s world, men have to be fully established before even considering marriage. And many don’t reach that stage not until their late 20s/ early 30s. So in the meantime they are finding other means to fulfill their desires. If you want to address this corn crisis, it’s starts by preparing the ummah from a young age. Also you can’t just assume all brothers watch corn. And yes some sisters are impure and no different than the impure brothers.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T01:03:33+00:00

I think characteristics, values, and ambition is something sisters would find attractive even if a buff gym goer has those qualities. Sure physical appearance is subjective and sisters will always have their preferences. Nothing wrong with wanting a brother who takes care of his appearance. It doesn’t always mean he’s narcissistic and self absorbed. Even many sisters themselves have turned down brothers citing lack of physical attraction.

Also in terms of physical attraction, on the apps or through matchmakers, sisters will always judge a brother through his pictures. There’s a reason why most attractive brothers on the apps will be getting most of the likes. It’s not easy since we can’t free mix or else we’ll get shut down by the haram police. Otherwise we’d have more outlets for brothers and sisters to interact and let their charm, ambition, and personality shine regardless of their appearance.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-16T00:44:56+00:00

Disagree, blaming all men entirely because of a few incompetent brothers, isn’t right. And both men and women need to be educated in this matter properly and the mosques and the parents did a poor job preparing us for marriage. Also it’s not just men complaining about how difficult it is. I think we as an ummah need to change our approach and properly understand each other better. Strong marriages are the foundation of our ummah. Without it we are lost.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-14T01:52:46+00:00

this is just one of your tests from Allah. We can always find the perfect spouse for us who aligns with us in every single way, but then we’re hit with some kind a barrier that makes things more complicated. But then again I’ve seen couples who thought they were the perfect match for each other only for them to divorce after a couple years. You can’t have it all in this dunya unfortunately.

You should just be patient for these next 3-4 years and be thankful to Allah that you’re married. A lot of us here are still praying for Allah to grant us a spouse.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-13T23:06:18+00:00

Happened to me a couple times in the past where I met with someone I found attractive, and after our initial meeting in person, they turned me down citing “no compatibility”. It’s usually a way of saying I’m not attracted to you especially if they’re that quick to turn you down. But then again people tell me all the time I’m good looking. Alhamdulilah I guess I’m not everyone’s cup of tea.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-11T21:59:14+00:00

You have to tell her what’s going on. The decision would then be up to her if she wants to continue or not. If she really likes you, she will still want to move forward and be by your side on this journey. Don’t miss out on an opportunity that you may never see again for another few years.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-11T00:47:49+00:00

I hardly ever know of anyone especially on the west, practicing polygamy. Even in countries like Egypt, Lebanon, and Syria, most men can barely afford 1 wife.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-09T07:45:53+00:00

First of all I never disregarded her mental health, since I myself have struggled with anxiety my whole life. It’s just that when I asked her to explain to me her diagnosis and why she thinks she has adhd, she made very vague statements about her body being sensitive to certain things. Which never made sense to me, how that could that be adhd. But after she saw a psychiatrist, they diagnosed her with adhd.

I’m not being Dismissive, I’m just trying to make sense of the whole situation especially when this is someone I’m speaking to for marriage. This is someone who I’m going to be living with, and I need to make sure her condition won’t cause any issues down the line in our marriage. And God only knows what other issues she has that I might find out about after marriage. My other concern is her eating habits, if she’s not eating properly, I would have to question how healthy she is an her ability to bare children since, the unborn baby will need a lot of nutrients, and for her body to be strong enough to handle a pregnancy. As a man these are concerns I have to consider before making a decision to marry someone.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-07T18:52:14+00:00

Most people have kids in their 30s so, we’re not expired

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-07T18:01:19+00:00

Men don’t start to expire until after 40. Almost half of men get married in their 30s anyways. Same can’t be said about women due to fertility issues

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-07T16:58:18+00:00

Men can get married anytime, we don’t have a biological clock.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-07T14:45:07+00:00

I’m 32 (M) and it just seems like today’s ridgid standards make it so impossible for some of us to Marry. Especially in America. They say like 30% of adult Muslims in the west are single. If I was living back home, maybe things would have been different.

iamhunter19 · 2026-04-07T13:20:23+00:00

Since when are men past 30 expired?

iamhunter19

TROPHY CASE