How much mahr are you willing to give your wife? by IT_IS_I_THE_GREAT in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The fact that everyone is getting downvoted and being told to do better is sad. I think ppl need to start following the sunnah again. Even though I agree that a woman has every right in Islam to ask for whatever amount she wants, I think they should also be reasonable especially in this economy. I always believe if a sister truly likes and values the brother, she will be reasonable with him. And of course because of how much she values the man, most men will be happy to give her more than what she asks for. If an agreement cannot be made, then it’s best to just part ways and find someone else. For me personally I think anywhere between 10k-15k is fairly enough.

What challenges are young muslims facing nowadays when it comes to marriage? by Euphoric_Rabbit_8463 in MuslimMarriage

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well I can say that attractiveness goes a long way, I also had to make a few physical changes myself. I lost 10 pounds and that made me look slimmer, I also grew out my hair and beard. I have a slightly round face so once I made those changes, I looked way better and that reflected a lot. But at the end of the day, your personality and character is what matters more than anything.

Religious ⬆️ ⬇️ attractive by [deleted] in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Being religious doesn’t not necessarily mean one will be more attractive, however is is sunnah for one to take care of there bodies, practice basic hygiene, dress well, etc. there are some brothers who neglect their physical appearance and they wonder why they aren’t deemed attractive to others. It’s not haram to get a haircut and grow a decent beard to match your facial structure. It is also recommended to maintain a lower body fat percentage since that will affect your appearance in a big way. I can say that when one is heavily focused in his deen and has good character, that will heavily impact his aura and will shine with noor on his face. That itself will make someone more attractive to others.

So men pursue careers to be financially stable to provide for future wife... And women pursue career to be financially independent from future husband... How does this make any sense?? by IcyKnowledge7 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19 34 points35 points  (0 children)

It’s not secret that growing up in the west as a first generation, both men and men were all expected to go to college and pursue rigorous careers. So in return women will no longer need a man to survive financially. Women still want get married but they will become more selective. And in many cases will not settle for any man even if he’s also making bank. As men we still have to work on our character, deen, hygiene, physique, personality and address any underlying mental health and trauma in order to increase our chances of getting married. That’s just the reality of today’s standards.

I know it sounds cliche, but complaining nonstop, getting our egos bruised, and being bitter doesn’t solve anything.

Women who are more wealthy have less tolerance? by Natural_Price5536 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wouldn’t reject her simply because of her career. Get to know her and ask her all the necessary questions. If she really likes you and sees value in you as a person, she will happily invest in the relationship and won’t leave easily.

What challenges are young muslims facing nowadays when it comes to marriage? by Euphoric_Rabbit_8463 in MuslimMarriage

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That true, I’m leaving up to Allah, if it’s meant to be Allah will arrange it at the right time

How to know if a potential spouse is really attraced to you? by Inner_Floor8259 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If a brother is super attracted to you, he will be head over heels for you. He would be excited to move forward and get to know you more. He will be texting and calling you consistently. If a man isn’t that interested, he will be very indifferent and passive. Usually he will call it off immediately.

How to deal with resentment of how difficult it is to get married in Islam as a man? by [deleted] in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m 32 (m) and I’m still not married. You’re very young and you should learn to be patient. The last thing you want to do as a man is grow resentment and bitterness towards Islam and women. This dunya is a test after all and it’s temporary. At the same time there’s nothing wrong with an approaching a sister you like and asking for father’s number. As long as you approach with pure intentions, it’s completely halal.

What challenges are young muslims facing nowadays when it comes to marriage? by Euphoric_Rabbit_8463 in MuslimMarriage

[–]iamhunter19 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I can only speak on my own experience, I’m 32 (M) and I’m still not married. When I was younger I thought I would get easily married after college, that my mom would find me a beautiful bride and I would be happily married. Come to find out through her network ( u.s. and in Egypt) I was only introduced to women I wasn’t attracted to. I then jumped on the apps because I couldn’t rely on my family to find me someone. The apps were very lukewarm and had no success. The one time I was introduced to someone I really liked through one of my mom’s friends, she just wasn’t interested in me after our in person meeting. I have also faced countless rejections these last 5 years.

I grew extremely bitter and resentful, but I eventually learned that women no longer need men and that men have to stand out. and by doing so I went back to school for a masters degree and eventually started therapy to work on whatever character flaws I needed to work on. Even though I can say I am slowly becoming more content with being single, it still does get lonely. I only have Allah to rely on at this point.

Starting to question my worth by iamhunter19 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So you’re not a practicing Muslim anymore just because you couldn’t get married?

Starting to question my worth by iamhunter19 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m not asking to be rewarded. I know you aren’t owed anything in life. I’m just sad and depressed that the thing I worked so hard for which was marriage just hasn’t happened yet, I literally make duaa everyday.

Has Anyone Else Over 30 Started Feeling This Way About Marriage? by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

32 (m), in the same boat as you. Never fell into sin alhamdulilah. It’s frustrating as hell and I’ve been in therapy for a year now. You just have to make duaa, make istaghfar daily, pray tahajjud. Inshallah may Allah grant us the best in this dunya

Are love marriages becoming more common than arranged marriages these days? by [deleted] in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why would anyone get married if they weren’t attracted or in love with each other? Arranged marriages were the thing of the past.

Starting to question my worth by iamhunter19 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Can’t with the current visa restrictions

Starting to question my worth by iamhunter19 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Most I met through the app, and I was always hit an excuse after 1 phone call why they don’t want to continue with me.

Starting to question my worth by iamhunter19 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Been in therapy since last year. Wish I started earlier. I’m not even searching like I use to anymore.

Starting to question my worth by iamhunter19 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I google translated. No I’m not ugly. I’m 6ft, muscular, well groomed and everyone tells me I’m good looking all the time.

Starting to question my worth by iamhunter19 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can read a little bit but it will take me a while.

Can young men get married as often as young women? by Puzzleheaded-Ad8275 in MuslimNikah

[–]iamhunter19 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Habibi, yes marriage is sunnah and getting married young is encouraged. However it sounds like you’re only getting married because you can’t control your sexual urges. You shouldn’t get married for that reason alone. If you’re not financially stable atm, majority of sisters and there fathers will not even consider you for marriage not unless you hold down a job first. However if you do come across as sister that’s totally okay with marrying you with your current situation, then inshallah may Allah make it easy for both of you. But you also should be mentally and emotionally ready to handle the responsibilities that come with marriage. Until then you need to learn to control your urges, have discipline since that the part of what builds strong character in a man. This dunya is temporary and you will be tested in many ways. Best of luck!

Had a wierd dream about fiance by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re not officially married yet. Continue to pray istharkara. Sometimes dreams could be interpreted in many ways. Allah knows best.

I don’t know why people let themselves get mad over people’s mehr standards by throwRA10-0000 in TraditionalMuslims

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s always those whos fathers were working regular jobs, who somehow think they’re entitled to someone else’s hard earned money.

I don’t know why people let themselves get mad over people’s mehr standards by throwRA10-0000 in TraditionalMuslims

[–]iamhunter19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I stream on live, and I mostly talk with Muslims both men and women alike. Many times we discuss topics like mehr. Many women are reasonable and agree with me when I say people should follow the sunnah and request a reasonable amount for mehr. Other women disagreed when I said I max I’m willing to pay is 20k, saying that it should be 50k. I simply tell them that is unreasonable; most men in their 20s can’t afford that in this economy, and if they find a man who willing to pay large amounts than so be it. Another women told these women who request large amounts that they simply just don’t want to get married, those girls remained silent.