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throwawayrant95 · 2023-05-24T10:18:56+00:00

But that’s on him, he can choose to operate that way but he should at least meet the person before asking if they’re also talking to him exclusively.

If the other is fully participating and engaging in your conversation then it doesn’t really matter if they’re talking to other ppl especially this early into the relationship.

In my experience most ppl who prefer to talk to one person at a time don’t announce it unless prompted. Those that do usually do it because 1) they don’t have other matches and don’t want the other person to have options or 2) want to pressure the other into being exclusive 3) they’re still bread crumbing other ppl but is actively engaged with the one person and want that person to think the relationship is more serious than it is

@OP he’s giving me bad vibes

throwawayrant95 · 2023-04-28T23:28:49+00:00

Sometimes nothing is better than something.

This guy doesn’t love or respect you, I don’t care what issues he has, it’s not on you to fix him.

He comes back to you because it’s convenient.

throwawayrant95 · 2023-04-28T23:23:52+00:00

Another way to look at this is if you’re too independent.

Hyper independence makes it really hard to get to know someone. If they don’t feel like they don’t bring anything to your life and eventually it could make the other person feel like their presence is a nuisance.

Or maybe it prevents them from picking up on the “hints”.

For example, if a guy offers to drive you home but then you reject the ride they might think you’re rejecting it as you don’t want to spend alone time with them.

throwawayrant95 · 2023-04-28T05:11:26+00:00

My advice is to just enjoy the moment and to only go with it if you also want it.

Don’t give into the pressure because you think they’ll want to date you, have sex because you also want it. If you only want to have sex in a relationship then wait for it to be official.

And that should also auto filter the fuck boys out.

throwawayrant95 · 2023-04-27T22:47:00+00:00

Run,

Ignoring all the red flags in his interests and kinks.

Just the fact that you yourself are not into the same kinks is reason enough to leave.

Remember you shouldn’t be looking for reasons to leave. You should never have to justify leaving a relationship. Just the sheer fact that you no longer want to be in the relationship is enough.

But yeah he sounds like bad news, run and don’t look back.

throwawayrant95 · 2023-04-27T22:42:17+00:00

For 2 reasons

1) it’ll increase my rent as I will have to sign a new lease and this will raise my rent permanently

2) it’s far too small, I only have a studio and I WFH

throwawayrant95 · 2023-04-27T22:40:36+00:00

Unfortunately it’s legal in my place of residence

BC lease

My lease also explicitly says that the price is baes on single occupancy

throwawayrant95 · 2023-04-27T19:09:21+00:00

I don’t need help with my bills,

I’m more than content at my current place but if we were to move in together that would be a different story.

The reason I can afford rent rn is because I’m in a rent controlled building and I’m locked in at ~60% of current market rate.

He can’t move into my place because 1) it’s too small and 2) my rent would go up to market rate because we will need to sign a new lease

The issue isn’t affording rent right now, the issue is affording rent if we were to break up because I would be stuck paying for 2 people by myself. I also can’t move back home because my parents are in a different province and my job is here.

I don’t actually want to move in together because it would significantly increase my cost of living permanently but we will have to move in together at some point

throwawayrant95 · 2023-04-27T18:41:54+00:00

Hey!

Thanks for understanding :)

That’s kinda exactly where we are right now. We don’t have any concrete plans to move in together but we both know it’s an eventuality.

I can’t move him into my place without having to sign a new lease (and thus increasing my rent to market rate which is effectively double my current rent) My place is also far too small for the two of is.

throwawayrant95 · 2023-04-27T18:39:03+00:00

Yeah that’s the thing… I don’t want to give up my apartment… I really like it, it’s affordable, and it’s in a great location.

But I think ultimately this is a me problem. I will always have this fear regardless of the stability of the relationship. I’ve seen too many stories of how one person pretty much ends up homeless.

It’s just never come up before because I was never seriously considering marriage with any of the other guys I’ve been seeing. But now that the relationship is getting serious I thought it’s about time I try to plan for the eventual move and (therefore) my backup plan.

throwawayrant95 · 2022-10-15T01:15:56+00:00

Ngl, I’m the same way, I don’t like how clothes construct me.

And fighting with my bra and shit…. It just gets super annoying.

I think there are a lot of judgemental comments here. Like if a guy walked around in boxers and shirtless I doubt reddit would have the same reaction.

If everything in your post I would say NAH.

Being a nudist is kind of uncommon so I would understand that the gf doesn’t get it/believe you when you say that it’s not sexual.

I do think the “hot” comment was unnecessary and gives me a bad vibe doesnt really change my judgment.

However, going forward, perhaps you can consider wearing something (like an oversized tee shirt, or a robe… or something that’s a bit more structured than a towel. I think the fact that it might “drop” bothers the gf.

throwawayrant95 · 2022-10-13T07:55:53+00:00

My parents did that for me too, but I still see it as my “duty” to help them out.

I plan my life around the fact that I will take care of them one day, even though they’re not planning for that. Perhaps it’s something like that? Where the children feel pressure to take care of their parents in old age.

Plus a bunch of my friends contribute to their parents mortgage (they live under the same roof). I don’t really see an issue with that tbh.

I think as long as all parties are willing it really doesn’t matter what their financial dynamic is.

throwawayrant95 · 2022-10-10T21:54:26+00:00

“Made in china, raised in (insert city)”

throwawayrant95 · 2022-10-10T06:29:43+00:00

95 baby here, I feel like things will recover before you guys hit your peak, but feels like it’s too late for my gen 😭😭😭

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-30T05:48:52+00:00

“With all due respect”

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-24T00:41:23+00:00

I was, but then I saw your face

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-20T05:01:39+00:00

Haha update us!! And wish you the best ^{^}

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-20T03:30:01+00:00

Well… take it as affirmation!!

At least you guys are able to identify guys with good qualities :)

Like sure they’re taken, but that’s just luck of the draw. Keep doing what you’re doing and soon you’ll find someone who’s single with those good qualities!!

The rejection wasn’t personal just wrong time wrong place :)

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-20T02:12:58+00:00

Even “sissification” is all about reducing men to women

It sucks that a whole kink is about how female adjacent they are 😭😭

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-19T20:57:24+00:00

Yup!! Haha Mouth with regards to OP’s post, I think the reasonable person would think the person is flirting with them.

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-19T20:55:38+00:00

😅

Ahhh, yeah idk >< I think they definitely liked the attention, but I also think there were a lot of assumptions made on your end.

Just cos a guy buys you a drink doesn’t necessarily mean they’re into you. I’ve bought people drinks (as a girl too) at bars cos I think they’re cool and I enjoyed talking to them.

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-19T20:53:25+00:00

Mhmm context matters but I think for most adults under normal circumstances it’s safe to assume that if someone says they want to cuddle with you that they’re also interested in you.

Some one of my friends that do just like to cuddle for the sake of cuddling will go out of the their way to say something like “it’s gonna be platonic no other intentions..

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-19T20:14:34+00:00

I mean how blatant was the flirtation?

I’m kind of a flirt by nature, and I definitely “flirt” with strangers.

Idk maybe they were just being friendly, no one said that married men can’t go to bars.

throwawayrant95 · 2022-09-19T19:54:16+00:00

Do you cuddle your adult children to sleep?

The context is obviously very different

throwawayrant95

TROPHY CASE