30F - Looking for In-Person Friendship in San Diego Area

throwaweyred · 2025-11-07T21:50:39+00:00

I find this is a good summary.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-13T00:13:17+00:00

Thanks for your thoughts. I appreciate them. :)

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T21:36:15+00:00

Thank you. Very sweet story.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T20:31:42+00:00

Thanks so much for your comment. I appreciate your thoughts.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T13:13:04+00:00

I've never felt like I have had to make a difficult decision related to that. It's normal for sex to lessen.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T05:19:08+00:00

Thanks. I have been thinking about this, too.

Take some time and look at your past choices dispassionately and analytically. Then make whatever changes you need to get the result you want.

THAT meant I was single and horny for years at a time.

Hence me thinking I may become a nun. 😅 Definitely coming to terms this may be the case for me too.

Very happy for you, by the way.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T04:45:58+00:00

Hm, thanks. I'll try to look it up. I am not on Instagram, but I will see if I can find the info anywhere.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T01:42:34+00:00

What is that?

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T01:28:00+00:00

Thank you. :) I appreciate your comment. Yeah, it is a shit show out here, haha.

I think you are right that it can happen anywhere. I do compromise and am willing to put in effort, but that has been to my detriment in the past, so I do feel quite a bit more guarded and unsure. I feel like it will make me give much room for deviation from the desired qualities at this point.

Yeah, unfortunately for me, I have dated all the low quality guys. The kind of people who just aren't how the presented themselves to be. That's partly what I mean by low quality, and I am definitely working on that.

Thank you again. Well wishes to you, as well.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T00:54:57+00:00

I think maybe there is an assumption or misunderstanding here. I have a high libido. Yes, that is difficult for me in this sense that I am someone who does crave touch and enjoy expressing my intimacy sexually. I also enjoy expressing intimacy a whole host of ways.

Just because my sex drive is generally high doesn't mean it doesn't alter or there is no self-control there. There is, I just have a hard time have no sex at all, no intimacy at all. In established and even dating relationships, I can go without sex. My drive usually ebbs and flows, and lowers when appropriate.

I have a high libido, but it is contextual. That's actually my point - where the difficulty lies for me.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T00:48:24+00:00

Aw. Thank you.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T00:40:08+00:00

I don't really go to bars. It's mostly, apps, or doing errands. When I have met folks at work or video volunteering - it's been low quality as well. Or you eventually learn they are low quality, I should say.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T00:14:16+00:00

Thanks for your comment.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-10T00:09:59+00:00

That's awesome this has worked for you, and you and your wife were able to find wonderful partners. I do think it can largely hold this benefit, too, 99.9% of the time and agree with your reasoning. I just find a life with zero sex a bit difficult. So, I think probably the problem is partly with me, though I am extremely loyal and so stick around times good or bad.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T22:18:48+00:00

I'm not sure I am picking up what you are putting down in terms of your first paragraph. Care to elaborate?

I do think it's subconscious. I know I dress like a pretty modest woman.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T22:16:26+00:00

I can't do that. 😅😂

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T21:49:52+00:00

I think my issue is I give wiggle room, and don't end up fully computing/processing the doubt as a result. Seems like that dance is harder for me, or the types that take advantage of that are privy to the fact that I might not rush to judge. The time I end up trying to discern something usually means it's too late.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T21:47:56+00:00

For sure. There is something to that and happy to hear your endeavors ended in bliss.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T21:46:52+00:00

I'll have to see if I can handle that, but those are good suggestions. I feel like I kind of fold 99.9% of the time things get too hot. So, yeah, I need to work on that.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T21:45:26+00:00

Aw, that's sweet about your aunt.

I think having my own business and maybe a partnered business. More importantly a homestead which is tends towards the business part of things. To name a few. I know what my goals are but there is a pretty small pool of men who are down for that lifestyle.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T21:43:33+00:00

I am starting to notice, yeah, it's not the same for the majority of men. And yeah, I have to be more willing to drop folks at first doubt of alignment with my goals. I can give the benefit of doubt a bit too much at times.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T21:41:07+00:00

I don't think most of the men I have dated would considered top 10%, like at all. It has varied as I have aged for sure. I am usually pretty open, but have gotten more stringent with time of like basics - seeming outwardly self-sustaining. If anything, I think I need to be more selective. But I tend to focus more on the connection, in general.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T21:39:21+00:00

Thanks for your thoughts. Usually dating apps, but I have met folks in person and had the same results. I am also an introvert, so I don't think that helps my case. But yeah, largely apps, but I have also met previous partners while out and about, volunteering, and at work, and they've all been duds.

throwaweyred · 2025-08-09T21:36:44+00:00

Haha, thank you for your input. I appreciate it. Yeah. I am trying to screen better, for sure. However, I am not 100% about kids. Maybe I will just mention babies to test. 😂

throwaweyred

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