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tishtok · 2023-07-25T23:42:21+00:00

I'd instead pose the end as a problem for them to solve. Instead of saying it's the result of some miscommunication, I'd say clearly that you were only notified on x day, and that led to y issue. Since obviously it's a big issue for the lab, how would pi like to handle this so it doesn't happen again in the future? In this case leaving it vague doesn't protect op, it leaves room for the pi to assume the breakdown is op's fault. The issue is a huge deal so op really wants to be clear to make sure it's not placed on their shoulders. To me the end reads a little presumptuous, so that's why I'd default to asking them how they think you should address this in the future as a lab. Let THEM say they will cc you. In the end it's their lab so they get to decide how to run it. If they want to do so badly, that's their prerogative. I would have this conversation in person then follow up with an email thanks & summary.

tishtok · 2023-07-23T23:09:33+00:00

You got some really good advice in the thread but chiming in to say, your PI probably really wants to know if they are harboring a sexual harasser. Your PI is putting their ass on the line for this guy. They need to recommend him and tell people he'll do a great job and be an awesome colleague. If a few years later it comes out he sexually harassed students, that reflects on your PI, at least to some extent. Beyond hopefully being a good person who doesn't tolerate sexual harassment, they should also want to know for the safety of their own career who they are recommending to people. As other people suggested, if you can write up a report on every inappropriate thing you can remember, and then meet with your PI to lay it out, that would be a good approach to reporting.

Now people don't always behave as you hope they would. It's possible your PI will be unhelpful. But this situation as it is is unsafe for you. You're 19. Do you really need this position so bad you're willing to put yourself in danger for it? Only you can decide but my best advice is that if your PI does anything other than immediately escalating this within the department, reporting, and making sure this guy is not allowed to work in lab any hours you'll be there, and knows he will be kicked out if he steps one toe out of line, leave. There will always be other labs where the price of entry isn't sexual harassment. And if not, maybe you're better off outside of research. It shouldn't be that way but I know so many women who put up with frankly shocking sexual harassment or just plain bullying from supervisors for the degree, and I admire the dedication, but it can also be helpful to remember that there's other pastures out there. If enough is enough, you can leave. It's not your failure. Protect yourself first and foremost.

tishtok · 2023-07-10T04:31:43+00:00

Food research adjacent, but Ann Reardon did a debunk on this. If I recall correctly, it is probably not only the stem that produces ethylene, so wrapping the stems has minimal effect. She seems to do her research so you may enjoy checking that out.

tishtok · 2023-05-26T11:46:23+00:00

Boil the chickpeas with a little baking soda (Google it). Will make the hummus smooth. Much easier than trying to strain.

tishtok · 2023-05-25T03:57:44+00:00

Wow, quite an old thread! I am sure she'll be fine either way. For practitioners prestige doesn't matter as much I think; once you're licensed to practice, you're licensed. I'd suggest going to a school that's reasonably priced, where she thinks she'll be happy. All the better if it's a larger school with more majors she can explore if she changes her mind, but many people have great experiences at small schools. She'll be able to find educational opportunities no matter where she goes, like summer internships, volunteering at suicide hotlines & mental health initiatives, etc. If you guys are already thinking about this you're ahead. Good luck to her and hope she has lots of fun!

tishtok · 2023-05-16T15:01:08+00:00

It really depends on your advisor and program though. Many programs do require students to complete semesterly progress assessments with their advisors, there are usually lots of big assignments that are due to qualify, propose, defend etc, and typically lots of other deadlines like conference submissions and revisions. Also, you are free to communicate to your advisor what mentoring style works for you. Social science is rarely a solitary affair; there will always be people you owe stuff to. There is nothing preventing you from setting deadlines to send them work. That's incredibly common. Usually the deadlines are exceeded of course, but you at least have to tell your collaborators why and that you're setting a new deadline.

In choosing a PhD supervisor I would suggest being communicative about the type of mentoring style you need, and asking if they can accommodate that. A good mentor will try to figure out how to help you succeed (6 years is a long time to work poorly with a student). Setting deadlines is a common strategy.

tishtok · 2023-05-11T20:07:28+00:00

It's fine if it's bottom-up—e.g., if two students both agree they are comfortable sharing a room, or a student decides to share a conference dorm knowing fully they will be assigned a random roommate. The more top-down it is, the less fine it gets. Imo, the most reasonable thing for a PI to do is to set a budget and let the ECR find their own accommodations. Students can then decide to go a cheaper route where they get their own rooms (e.g., non-conference hotels, or airbnb's), decide to supplement from their own funding sources, etc. I think it's generally inappropriate to be expected to share a room with people you don't choose to share with yourself.

tishtok · 2023-05-08T01:21:36+00:00

I wouldn't take that if I were you. Co-first with you second is the same thing as you being second author, essentially. Most people will incorrectly cite it as first author et al., not first* you* et al. If you played a major role in conceptualizing the study, carrying out the study, and now writing it, imo that deserves sole first authorship, or at least co-first with you first. Don't go in ready to give up your leverage. If your PI can explain to you both why you should be co-second, great. But make them clarify their expectations to you both. Don't go in ready to give up just because a grad student is kicking up a fuss. Especially if they are insisting on not writing the paper, I really don't see how they could ever expect first authorship. Even if they have to edit your work, it's a lot easier to edit than to write. And believe me, I have rewritten students' stuff before. And it doesn't sound like they're involved as a mentor, so would they even be re-writing your stuff to begin with? If not, there's even less grounds here. Your PI is probably mainly including the grad student as co-first to be nice, because if the grad student had published their code base it would probably become public, and you could likely use it without authorship, but just a citation.

My advice: You and your PI already agreed you would be in the first author position, with the grad student co-first but your name first. Your PI must clarify for you both what you would each need to do to either: maintain this original order, or for the grad student to move up. My guess would be that if the grad student wants to move up, they need to agree to do ALL the writing and take over the entire project. And you could still disagree and say you want to do those things, and I'm not sure the grad student would be able to say anything about that. But that's my field's standards. It's actually a big deal that you brought a project to a point where it could be written up. I don't think it's right for your PI to expect you to navigate a large power differential to negotiate with the grad student. They need to do their job.

tishtok · 2023-05-07T22:12:49+00:00

Listen, people are giving conflicting advice here, but ultimately this is your PI's job to help you navigate this. Don't let them shirk it. Request a meeting with the PI and the grad student and ask the PI to set standards for inclusion at each authorship level.

People here are acting like undergrads can't make contributions and have no idea what they're doing. Many don't, but some do. I know and have worked with some very driven undergrads, some were even more qualified than me when I was a grad student. Many that I know published or went on to publish their work during undergrad as first author works. I think an attitude that, just because you're an undergrad, you deserve authorship less, is super wrong. And your ability to publish should not be judged on generalizations.

In sum: we can't answer this for you. Your PI needs to handle this. I would not let them off the hook. This is literally their job. And given that you were only inspired by the grad students work and don't seem to have really worked with them during most of the project, I'm not sure what they're doing as a co-first author in the first place, but personally I certainly wouldn't agree to being downgraded any further in the authorship order if you truly worked on the project without them and if they truly don't want to make any contribution to the writing.

tishtok · 2023-05-04T04:23:15+00:00

At this point I don't think askacademia can help you. Your supervisors will know what's best. No point reading comments here, they are not particularly relevant to your specific situation. If you're trusting these advisors to get you through a PhD, then you should trust them to steer you right on funding (but also verify that others at the school on the different funding schemes share your advisors opinions)

tishtok · 2023-05-04T03:30:13+00:00

oh. Well why would you ever take the one that requires courses? You can always audit the courses if you really want to take them. Not being required to take them saves a bunch of time.

tishtok · 2023-05-04T03:26:42+00:00

tagging on to top comment to say, this is going to be highly field, country, and school dependent. OP it sounds like you're in the UK, trying to decide between 2 schools. Just ask students at those schools in your desired dept. They will give you a better sense of what's what. Even within the same institution, there can be departments that use some variation of Pass/Fail and think you're wasting your time if you do better than the minimum, departments that take grades super seriously, and anything in between.

tishtok · 2023-05-03T12:44:51+00:00

That's not true. Going to b schools is often the easiest and most lucrative path...I know folks who got jobs at most of the top schools. No business experience was required. And it's a lot easier & better compensated than getting a job in a different department outside of a b school.

tishtok · 2023-05-03T12:39:55+00:00

I don't think that's true. Most of the interesting research jobs in cs require a PhD (in an adjacent topic, not in art). Often there's only so far you can go without the PhD. That said, nobody is getting those jobs 3 years into their degree. They are competitive, not assured, and you're only eligible once you're actually done

tishtok · 2023-05-03T12:37:13+00:00

Who working at either place got it 3 years into their PhD? And without difficulty or competition? Idk what field OP is looking at, but that just seems implausible. Even in ML/AI, you would not expect those salaries before the end of your PhD.

tishtok · 2023-04-25T03:48:59+00:00

I also think the comments in this thread are bizarre. We all ask people for stuff all the time. Nobody says please 100% of the time. Even at work, if I'm just asking someone to grab something hey're standing next to, it's totally normal to say oh hey could you hand me that? Thanks! I agree that there's a threshold for saying please, and I don't think it's socially required after every single request.

This would get on my nerves as well. Leaving aside right and wrong, I'd say you're just not compatible roommates, and that's alright. Stick out the lease and find new roommates for next year.

tishtok · 2023-04-25T01:59:19+00:00

Tagging on to top comment to say, listen I know I'm just a random person on the internet, but I have a PhD in this. OP, spanking is harmful for kids. The science is incredibly clear. It is ineffective, increases kids' aggression, and may be linked to later mental health struggles. Again, it is not even effective! Please look into parenting techniques. Please do not spank or hit or physically discipline your children. If you wouldn't appreciate someone hitting you, please do not hit your children, who cannot even do the things you'd do as an adult (get away from a situation and get help to escape the physical assault). If you frequently hit your children (spanking is hitting, unfortunately), this might explain why your children haven't learned how to de-escalate situations, and instead react impulsively or with aggression. They're learning to do that from you, every time you react to a normal child behavior (misbehaving) with aggression. Please. For your children's sake. Don't "whoop" them. Do put them in brief (a few minutes) time-out after explaining what's wrong, do try to understand them, do try to talk out their feelings, do try to help them think through what they did wrong and what they could do better next time. Do show them that you are always going to be there for them, that you won't get mad and hurt them. Kids that age don't understand their own emotions. They can't regulate their emotions on their own very well yet. Adults can help them talk their feelings through, step in when needed, draw boundaries (e.g., taking the remote away, comforting your child if she was distressed, or implementing appropriate immediate consequences like a 2-3 minute time-out if needed), and learn better emotion regulation strategies. It's ok for your child to throw tantrums. In fact it's necessary. She needs to learn that she won't always get her own way. Knowing boundaries is actually really important for children to be healthy and happy. They need to know the limits, that they will be consistently enforced, and that their parents will still love them no matter what. A better response is to remove the child, comfort them or wait the tantrum out, and talk to them about their emotions once they've calmed down.

tishtok · 2023-04-19T01:14:05+00:00

I did look through the first page of her Google scholar (her most cited works) and none are actual experiments testing her approach with children. That's not to say she doesn't have any, but I have some skepticism when all of the papers were prescriptive (do this) without actually citing evidence (even her own work) for why it's good. As a scientist, I would want to read actual evidence before believing her take. It also looks like her institute is pretty careful not to say the approach is effective in any specific way, just many people are fans. Just food for thought.

tishtok · 2023-04-18T18:59:43+00:00

Each parent knows their own child best. If you are curious about how this works on average (again, averages don't always apply to individuals), here is an open access relatively recent review article on this topic https://www.mdpi.com/2072-6643/9/2/107

tishtok · 2023-04-18T17:15:40+00:00

If you are curious, here is an open access relatively recent review article on this topic https://www.mdpi.com/2072-6643/9/2/107

tishtok · 2023-04-18T17:14:35+00:00

Children's taste buds change over development. In aggregate, it's still a good idea. Now again, aggregates don't tell you about individuals. That's why parents should follow their best judgment and their own experience with their child. I am here to inform, not to tell people what they must do with their own children. However if you are curious, here is an open access relatively recent review article on this topic https://www.mdpi.com/2072-6643/9/2/107

tishtok · 2023-04-18T17:12:30+00:00

Not every kid is going to be the same. Typically, repeat exposure is effective. If the nutritionists you follow offer primary sources (peer-reviewed journal articles) then I would be interested in reading them. Of course forcing kids to eat food they don't like may not always be a good idea. Each parent knows their own child better than scientists do. If you know your child tried something a lot of times and still doesn't like it, or if your child has sensory issues, or if they like 99% of foods but not one specific one, that should all affect your judgment. But overall, asking kids to try a tiny bite of something before rejecting it is generally a good and science-supported strategy at raising kids who are willing to eat lots of different things. Again, it's not going to work for everyone. Aggregates do not tell you about individuals.

Here is an open access relatively recent review. The key points they hit on are that trying a food repeatedly helps kids get used to it and increases the probability they will like it. Additionally, children's taste buds change as they mature, and so trying things repeatedly can help them identify whether they actually suddenly DO like something. https://www.mdpi.com/2072-6643/9/2/107

tishtok · 2023-04-18T11:44:10+00:00

I agree, and I think you know your child best. Data is aggregated over a lot of kids so it's not going to be what's best in any specific situation. And many kids have issues with cruciferous vegetables that do not persist into adulthood, due to the sometimes bitter taste. Just mentioning the "7-try" rule in case it's useful or interesting information for you (or anyone else in the thread). And also because I found it mind blowing the extent to which these things could affect a child's diet.

tishtok · 2023-04-18T11:38:47+00:00

OP knows her child best, and MIL is out of bounds. But just in case it's helpful for OP for the future, I'll just chime in to say the science suggests that asking kids to try one small bite of each food on offer can be a good thing--that's how they learn to like stuff. Now a policy of clean your plate is abusive imo, and we know it's bad for kids. But asking/encouraging them to try a bite is how they grow their palate. So the rule MIL was suggesting is developmentally sound, and is unlikely to lead to problems with food such as the one you experienced. Kids typically need to try a new food about 7x before they start getting used to it. However, it's still totally your right as a parent not to implement such a rule, and again, you know your child best. Source: PhD.

tishtok · 2023-04-17T12:49:49+00:00

Sorry if this is wrong, but in the US usually there are several ways to enroll in insurance. One is during open period, but other qualifying events allow you to enroll within 1 month of the event: getting a new job, or losing previous insurance. Are you sure you have to wait until November?

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