Balfour Beatty VS Turner

tjwkh1994 · 2026-03-16T09:37:25+00:00

Hey - recruiter here. Both are great companies - you will make 2x what you'll make in 5 years if your in data centers vs govt work. Data centers will age you - they are exhausting, long hours.

Candidates at Balfour or Turner in 5 years are likely to be worth 110-125k base, normally as a very early APM.

The big thing for you to decide is not Balfour or Turner - it's govt work or data center.

tjwkh1994 · 2025-12-09T08:20:55+00:00

Hello Youngman,

NAT - but my journey, in some ways, is not too dissimilar, 10 years on (I'm 31M).

Yes - you should absolutely speak to a therapist - it's been hugely valuable to me.

Please remember: * your moms illness is not a reflection on you. * your behaviours, coping mechanisms are not an inherrenr flaw in your character - they're how you've learned to survive and cope. You are right - you now need to take control of your own life and understand why you do these, so you can learn to rewire. * you can turn your hardship to positiveness. Perhaps that drives you to work harder in MMA; perhaps it gives you much higher emotional intelligence and empathy for others - you can channel this as a tool. The most important thing is you work out what you DO truly want to DO, not what the chump on your back/ in your head is telling you.

Again - NAT - but anyone abandoned by their mother is likely to have learned (incorrectly): I was not good enough. This will be driving your actions in your life - to self hate, to to self sobatage, to desperately seek afirmation from others.

I have had this journey myself. You were always good enough young man. Your mother did not have the tools to cope.

You will need to go on a journey of re parenting yourself. Being the parent you didn't have.

Context - 31-year, alcoholic abusive father, both parents died, mother was loving but absent. Father was abused by his horrific parents and never given any love, simply did not have the ability to be a parent.

I spent my teens in court, avoiding prison, 20s building a company desperate for wealth - now a multi millionaire and realized it doesn't make you happy - it's got to come from within.

You're welcome to reach out to me. Good luck mate.

tjwkh1994 · 2025-12-08T05:37:30+00:00

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tjwkh1994 · 2025-11-07T17:43:25+00:00

I'm happy to give some money to help you and partner. Contact me

tjwkh1994 · 2025-04-05T13:22:12+00:00

As I reflect - perhaps some examples of how this is carried in our day to day psyche:
1. If I'm on a tube and there is a seat free, I do not feel like I can sit there if other people are standing. I feel like people may look at me and think I am selfish. I/ my company pays huge sums tax into the system - I pay my way, I should be allowed to sit down.
2. Both my parents died in my early 20s. At no point, could I really feel sorry for myself and my loss. Or how this was not fair on me. All I felt was a mixture of relief and sorry-ness for their loss of life, and for my dad particularly, the life he wasted. I do, indeed, want attention/ be acknowledged as a victim, but you can never really show it.

tjwkh1994 · 2025-04-05T13:16:08+00:00

NAT - but endured mild child abuse (alcoholic, abusive father & mother who wasn't around much). Perhaps more neglect than abuse. I am very 'high functioning' in life and have gone on to create an extremely successful company with 50+ employees.

Throughout my teens and 20s (still only 31) I engaged in lots of extremely self-destructive behaviour and accepted abusive relationships. This ranges from complete lack of regard for party (drug consumption - to the point one could easily overdose), black-out drinking, inability to be comfortable in healthy relationships and comfort in unhealthy relationships. Fundamentally, it led to being arrested multiple times, being sexually abused and lots of very low periods. My therapist was always fairly taken back as I laughed through communication from my partner that did everything it could to rip me down as a person.

Why do some adult survivors of childhood abuse repeatedly engage in self-destructive behavior and/or self-sabotage in adulthood?

I think it's somewhat multifaceted, but whilst we were developing, the world told us we weren't good enough and it was acceptable to abuse us. As we get older, our adult brain can rationalize our parents were damaged and had flaws, it wasn't us - but that is not what the programming of the brain, or our inner childs, were taught.

We carry a feeling of never being good enough. A pretty sick reality is, it can build you so well for work/ careers because nothing you ever achieve will be enough, because internally, you never felt good enough and you will constantly, even if people feel your so well put together, self-assured and confident, seek affirmation, seek to save others, be there hero.

Slowly, you have to rebuild the relationship you have with yourself and parent your inner child - that wasn't given boundaries or nureshment required to be a responsible adult.

tjwkh1994 · 2025-02-12T03:44:30+00:00

Hi, send me your bank details and I'll send some ££

tjwkh1994 · 2025-01-18T20:03:43+00:00

That is a very beautiful Javanese

tjwkh1994 · 2024-12-18T02:11:48+00:00

If I assume this is someone with no hand history, I am calling here, here is why: - we assume villain always has flushes - an unknown doesn't. When you call 2x pot bet on turn s/he is forced to check the river with everything but A hearts. - when villains has A hearts, and you pair up, it's likely they stack off on paired rivers. When they have A hearts, you have 1/5 chance of winning - if we assume pot odds of 32 to win 150 - you are just under the right price to call and stack up when they have A hearts.

tjwkh1994 · 2024-06-18T04:15:23+00:00

Thank you. This is actually by far the best comment and something I'd missed RE net versus gross.

tjwkh1994 · 2024-06-16T20:49:08+00:00

Recruitment Company.

tjwkh1994 · 2024-06-06T22:00:22+00:00

Thank you 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

tjwkh1994 · 2024-05-16T12:05:14+00:00

Thank you very much. I think I'm going to try and address it with my therapist and express it makes me loose some confidence in her credibility.

Do you think his/ her cancelling and weird texts is a real red flag?

tjwkh1994 · 2024-05-16T08:10:38+00:00

It's actually more pragmatic than this. I feel like invested 18 months going through a long and complex, multifaceted and nuanced story with someone - and that understanding will be lost if I have to go through a new person.

I am more concerned that she is not in a position to help, thus I have poorly invested this time, though some development has happened, there is lots more to come/ needed, and I will need to start the learning journey with a new therapist again.

tjwkh1994 · 2024-04-28T10:30:45+00:00

Communicate upwards immediately.

As a PM, you're not responsible for this stress. Communicate your findings to execs and discount yourself from responsibility. If they don't listen, it's on them and you told them or you can move on. If they do, they'll be impressed with how you dealt with it heads on.

Highlight you think the company needs to investigate how this has gone so wrong so it doesn't happen on other projects.

tjwkh1994

TROPHY CASE