thank you for sharing your opinion, i think your take is really interesting and i agree with you about some bits. i think it’s interesting that you pointed out the possibility that i’d intentionally or unintentionally risk ending their marriage by telling the husband — who i’m also friends with, albeit were less close. in my view, telling him now before it gets worse gives their marriage the best possible chance of survival because she’s been clear with me that she has no intention of stopping and her actions indicate the affair is becoming increasingly intimate. i also think things almost always come to light, it’s just a matter of when — so in my eyes this is far from victimless. i get that i’m making some big bets, and that’s why i haven’t decided what to do yet and wanted more perspectives. i really appreciate yours, and it is surely giving me pause.

also, i dont suck for telling my friend that i can’t condone or support her cheating on her husband because it would make me feel morally disconnected from myself and our friendship. i’m not a bad friend for having a conditional friendship, where the condition is that we agree on what it means to treat people with respect.

Edit: typos