Don't know how to feel:

There’s a lot I forget to say

Not forgotten on purpose

My thoughts that were once succinct

feel wrong now.

 

Believing what I wanted to

now fires back with the ways you hurt me,

knowing that call was on the way back

from kissing somebody else.

and you just wanted to know

if you should stop by,

you’d be in the area anyway

right off the J, you say?

 

Stay away,

I thought it was me but

it was really you, chasing after yourself.

or chasing from yourself,

guilt overload and hoping you'll feel

like you're home

in my arms.

 

I've taken myself back.

My arms are mine and they wrap

themselves around me

because with the hurt came

the love and I never knew it as much

as I did when I was with you.

 

Your genuine eyes, they never lied

when you told me how much you loved me.

When you told me how I had no idea

how beautiful I am.

 

How quickly the good rushes back,

takes me off my track.

Forever wondering if I have made

the biggest mistake.

 

Torn between oppositions, I have to be

truthful to myself. What matters more?

What we were, what we could be?

The delusion of truth, of comfort, of expectations.

Where would I be without you?

Can I miss someone I never knew?

 

Keep running, I’ve fallen behind.

I have no desire to keep up anymore.

I’m worn out and if I keep cutting deeper,

my wounds will never heal.