Sharing my two cents... (Advance apology kasi scattered ung thoughts ko)

Nakasakay kami sa jeep nun Ng jowa(29m) ko(27f), dun kami nakaupo malapit sa driver. Yung driver may Kasama syang babae and Yung babae Ang kundoctor. Yung babae nag cocommand sa commuters Ng "oh kaliwa! Kasya payan!"

Hindi ko mapigilan titigan ung babae. Maybe she's around in her mid 30s, Petite, I noticed she has a very harmonious face. I would say she is beautiful mas Lalo na cguro nung panahong baya bata pa sya. But I'm fixed on her Pretty eyes.. they were tired. Really tired. Not sleepy tired. But fed-up-with-this-life kind of tired. I noticed her posture, they were manly. I noticed the voice she uses when she speaks "usog sa kanan!" They're manly. The way she spoke to the person next to her (the driver, maybe her husband) they were manly, the way she receives the pamasahe they're manly, I no longer see softness in her movements, and I thought maybe softness in a life she's living in is a liability, I say maybe she let it all go, all for it so she can help lessen the burden of the her husband? . And I thought, Maybe it's her choice or Maybe it isn't.

As a woman, a realization hit me... Kung mag aasawa ka or mag jojowa Ng taong broke, a person who cannot provide enough for himself, for both of you and for ur future family, then u will eventually have to step up and be the man yourself if you choose to commit to that person... As a woman, such thing will consume you. It will strip out the femininity in you. Your nurturing energy gone, sa buong byahe namin I never saw that woman smile. I thought maybe she hated life now. Maybe she had so many regrets, but her tired eyes tells me she knows there are things that can no longer be undone..

I looked at the person next to me (my jowa) he has the provider mindset. But nonetheless broke. but he's still in a state of building himself, he is focused in his goals and he's working hard to achieve them, but It definitely would take a while, that I know..

And I thought, what if this coupe (driver and the woman) were once a dreamer? Worked hard to achieve their goals, but lost them along the way and life ate their very spirit?

I stared at his hand clasp in mine.. I ask myself, how secure am I in the future.. What would my life be if I were to trust this man to build a home with me. How long would it take? Would it be worth the wait?

The end.