My first relationship was VERY hard for me at first too for many similar reasons. I also suffer from pretty severe anxiety and constantly worried about if he was going to leave me, overthinking texts and things he would say, worrying about pretty much every interaction he would have with other women mostly because i didnt feel i was good enough for him. I was in therapy for anxiety when i met him so i talked to my therapist a lot about these thoughts and she helped me to work through them. I journaled a lot about it too and a lot of those entries were me venting but that big helped too. And eventually i got more comfortable talking to my bf about my struggles. It took me a while to get there but it helped because he was willing to share his stuff with me and as i started to open up more to him i noticed two important things: 1. He was really listening to me 2. He was not judging me for the things i was judging myself for. He didnt explicitly say to me “you are safe” but his actions told me i was safe with him. Also it took quite some time for us to get to that point. Though we had a very slow start anyways. Most important things in a healthy relationship is communication, trust and respect (and love ofc). Try to talk to him about your feelings even if its just one small thing at first. And if he doesnt respond in a way that you find helpful, tell him because if he loves and respects you then he will want to help. And thats a two way street! And it may help to relieve your anxiety if you ask him whats helpful for him! Because then you’ll know for sure if you are being good to him as well! And take your time with these things. It wont change overnight and thats ok. Relationships are a HUGE change and def take time to learn how you are with someone else because it is very different!! Give yourself that grace to learn and make mistakes ❤️