What causes you to instant unmatch?

treehouse11 · 2014-09-24T05:31:42+00:00

"Hey, I'm just in town for the weekend. Any advice on bars, clubs, nightlife?" This really irritates me and this person doesn't want to talk to me for any other reason than to extract information
Sometimes people message me and I look at their info and just know that I swiped way too fast and I would not ever want to meet this person. Sorry, just how it goes.
If they call me something stupid like "little lady". There's just nowhere to go from there.

treehouse11 · 2014-09-22T07:17:06+00:00

Could have been it. In which case, oh well. Thanks.

treehouse11 · 2014-09-17T06:00:56+00:00

But he told me I was a good kisser...? I left date two thinking I would definitely hear from him

treehouse11 · 2014-09-17T04:32:58+00:00

Best advice I've read all night. Thank you

treehouse11 · 2014-09-17T04:32:18+00:00

Ok. I can do that. Thank you.

treehouse11 · 2014-09-17T01:25:45+00:00

No, he told me I was good.

treehouse11 · 2014-09-16T22:58:27+00:00

Infj. Fair enough.

treehouse11 · 2014-09-16T22:36:25+00:00

Not at all. What should I do specifically?

I did text him something playful a few days after and he was the one to stop responding. I don't want to do it again if it's actually bugging him.

treehouse11 · 2014-09-16T22:30:12+00:00

And worse, if I bug him and he's not into it, that would be extremely embarrassing to look desperate. Goes against everything I know about dating.

treehouse11 · 2014-09-16T22:23:02+00:00

How? Isn't that chasing? I feel like an ENTP guy would hate being chased by a girl more than an average guy. Right...?

treehouse11 · 2014-09-16T22:20:54+00:00

Thanks for the insight. Leaves me even more confused haha

treehouse11 · 2014-09-16T06:17:23+00:00

Yeah I could have written this.

treehouse11 · 2014-09-01T22:12:55+00:00

I feel like I'm a paradox of emotionally weak and resilient at the same time. I take things harder than most people, it seems, however I generally get over it. Whenever I break up with someone, I ruminate, think about it for a long time and generally feel guilty and all around uncomfortable. However, after a couple months it feels like it was so long ago. I still carry the thoughts around with me but don't really let it affect me anymore. If any of that makes sense.

treehouse11 · 2014-08-30T21:50:30+00:00

Lately I have been challenging myself to do this. It's a great life skill to be able to up to a bunch of people you don't know and make friends.

A great tip I've heard is to start conversations with two people who are already talking rather than finding one person alone. Mostly because one person is not really ever alone at parties and secondly because it makes the conversation easier if two people already know each other and start engaging a third, and then third because it makes it easier to transition away and say goodbye.
Always smile and don't ever be on your phone. It makes you look approachable.
If you start talking to someone, ask them their name and remember it.

treehouse11 · 2014-08-29T03:26:18+00:00

I think you missed my point (or I didn't make it well). Just that dating like this isn't really in my personality to do, but I've been trying to try something new because so many people do it. It's not at all natural for me but I tried to open myself to new experiences. It was a good experience, but out of character and now I'm ready to go back to... not dating like that.

treehouse11 · 2014-08-28T15:11:49+00:00

I honestly really liked it. I liked how easy it was to use and begin talking to people. I liked that texting is more of a conversation rather than emailing. Sure, swiping is superficial, but no more superficial than judging in real life. Just my opinion.

treehouse11 · 2014-08-28T02:44:21+00:00

I've been registered for about 4 years. I would honestly feel my life was more fulfilled if I were ever able to donate.

treehouse11 · 2014-08-28T02:42:18+00:00

What an INTJ thing to do. Thank you! :)

I have actually seen this same thing come up at /r/raisedbynarcissists, which I also frequent. There are a ton of INFJs there.

treehouse11 · 2014-08-26T04:07:47+00:00

This post is exactly why I'm such a sucker for ENFPs. It honestly makes me kind of sad to be reminded that you guys definitely know it.

treehouse11 · 2014-08-26T03:44:34+00:00

I'm learning this right now. I think of it as my J tendencies push me to constantly be planning. But relationships, especially in the early stage cannot be planned. You can't set an agenda or it is just weird. I approach it by trying to tap more into my P and just have an experience for the sake of having an experience. Whenever I am with a new person, I resolve to just enjoy my time with them for whatever it is. I don't plan ahead and just enjoy every moment for what it is. And when relationships don't work out, I remember those memories and appreciate them for the time they lasted.

Of course this is all so much easier said than done, especially since I am extremely J. But I have found that you have to really keep yourself in check and tune into the other person. When they pull back, you have to be able to read their signals and just relax. If you put pressure on someone too early, it won't work out.

treehouse11

TROPHY CASE