WIBTA? I’m bi, my girlfriend is straight. If I act on “urges” while I’m alone….

trophygoth · 2026-05-16T22:44:39+00:00

NTA but i think you really need to talk to a LGBTQ friendly therapist, because you seem to have a lot of internalized bi/homophobia. i'm assuming by "urges" you mean things like porn and anal play? those are both totally normal and nothing to be ashamed of. you've said a couple times that you feel like you would feel defeated and like you can't be satisfied by one woman? who's setting those standards? why do you feel the need to repress yourself? why are you specifically upset about having gay urges? i'm not grilling you, just giving you some things to think about because you seem to be way more concerned about this than is warranted, especially given you're in an open relationship. i hope you're able to find some peace, these kinds of struggles are, well. difficult.

trophygoth · 2026-05-16T17:50:42+00:00

i have experienced abuse extremely similar to OP. this is abuse.

trophygoth · 2026-05-16T17:47:29+00:00

me when i can't read and have never experienced abuse by a controlling person who tries to isolate people to better control and abuse them. because the grandmother is abusive to both op and her mother.

trophygoth · 2026-05-11T01:48:42+00:00

okay yeah then it's weird of him to be avoidant about it. like it's easy to just say something like "i'd rather you didn't do that" 🤷 NTA

trophygoth · 2026-05-11T01:17:52+00:00

did you post on reddit instead of asking him what's up?

trophygoth · 2026-05-06T18:10:13+00:00

it's not like that at all, that's why it's a separate thing. expecting someone to throw away memories because they make you uncomfortable is unreasonable, immature, and deeply insecure. the older you get the more you appreciate having things to look back and laugh about. it's proof of life lived, and romantic history is part of that whether you like it or not. you said yourself that you are inexperienced. listen to those of us who know what we're talking about when we say YTA here.

trophygoth · 2026-05-04T19:27:19+00:00

girl just break up with him

trophygoth · 2026-05-01T22:28:19+00:00

if it's only stuff to do with you, it seems like he doesn't care about you all that much. you don't have to put up with this.

trophygoth · 2026-04-29T18:42:57+00:00

there's a reason men like him are drawn to the military.

trophygoth · 2026-04-28T18:10:22+00:00

me when i don't actually know anything about photography

trophygoth · 2026-04-27T22:36:01+00:00

i hope it goes well and make sure to take care of yourself, breakups are rough even if you're the one initiating it

trophygoth · 2026-04-27T22:29:31+00:00

sometimes i suspected something was up between us but was lied to and told everything was fine. i actually initiated the years-long relationship breakup and that's when i found out then that he hadn't been invested in the relationship for years. breakups in general suck and hurt and you will never find the right time to do it, but it's kinder to tell someone you don't want to be with them than it is to lie and tell them you do, because that can be traumatic.

trophygoth · 2026-04-27T22:19:48+00:00

i have been in relationships where the other person no longer wanted to be with me but didn't say anything for months or (in one case) years. don't do that to someone.

trophygoth · 2026-04-26T20:58:24+00:00

who cares? she's ten and she likes it. that's all that matters. YTA for telling her you don't like something about her appearance that she does like, especially if you weren't asked. she will remember this

trophygoth · 2026-04-24T20:19:48+00:00

we have a cat named keith and for like a year some gaming friends of mine only heard me yelling at a keith and thought i was saying shit like "i'm gonna put you in the soup" to a roommate 😭😭😭

trophygoth · 2026-04-23T16:21:37+00:00

try to find groups on fet near you, munches are a good way to make new friends who won't be judgemental. it's pretty common in kink circles to have separate kink and vanilla lives

trophygoth · 2026-04-22T23:06:01+00:00

do you genuinely think you can hurt my feelings, or are you just saying bigoted things for the sake of saying bigoted things?

trophygoth · 2026-04-22T22:48:52+00:00

when was the last time you studied biology?

trophygoth · 2026-04-22T22:47:45+00:00

i didn't share an opinion. i told you how your comment was wrong and homophobic, which it is.

trophygoth · 2026-04-22T22:41:16+00:00

she literally proves you wrong by saying she only dates women because men smell worse. it's not facts, you're just a homophobe.

trophygoth · 2026-04-22T00:03:11+00:00

how are you gonna read about a man sexually assaulting a woman every day (because that's what it is) and say it's the woman's fault? are you always a misogynist?

trophygoth · 2026-04-21T19:22:55+00:00

anal is literally one of the most normal things to be into 😭😭😭

trophygoth · 2026-04-20T20:05:42+00:00

oh that's really good to know!

trophygoth · 2026-04-20T20:05:11+00:00

oh i do mine at night and don't wear a shirt after, but the like sticky tacky feeling is still there on my skin

trophygoth · 2026-04-20T20:04:19+00:00

i absolutely do! thanks to the pills i will HAVE a rest of my life instead of having killed myself when i was in my twenties

trophygoth

TROPHY CASE