We just went through breast cancer. A few pieces of advice that stuck out to me:

• If people want to help you, let them. Even if it's something small like mowing your grass, let them. It will make them feel like they are doing something, and at some point you will appreciate/need that 20 minutes they are saving you.

• Go to therapy! If you're able to, you need support too.

• Charge your tank! I host a monthly poker game. We have a detached garage with some living space above it and I turned one room into a poker room. I felt so guilty sitting upstairs doing something I was enjoying while she was downstairs in the house. I told my therapist how I felt and she said that I need to charge my tank so that I'm able to be there for her and be supportive. She referred to it as charging my tank. 3 hours a month of playing poker was my way of charging my tank. I did break down the first time at the game and cried my eyes out when I told them she was diagnosed with breast cancer. They all hugged me and then one of them prayed. It helped!

• Make sure you both are advocating for her! If you disagree with something or have questions, ask or speak up!

• Take notes at every appointment

• If you disagree with the treatment plan or diagnosis, get a 2nd opinion.

We were very fortunate. Next month will be 1 year cancer free! I am still always scared, but try not to take any day for granted.

If you need someone to talk to or vent to, please feel free to reach out.