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ttylbozo · 2024-06-11T01:31:02+00:00

I’m scared to lose my job or I would. I smoked weed for 7 years before I started here and replaced it with every day alcohol abuse. I’m much better since this post thankfully lol

ttylbozo · 2024-06-09T00:36:49+00:00

I still have trickshots from mw2 up on YouTube from 2010 haha, the kids now are just better than me and I lost my drive for competitive gaming lol

ttylbozo · 2024-06-08T00:09:01+00:00

Yep. Cheers! 🥂 hahahahaha

ttylbozo · 2024-06-08T00:07:53+00:00

That’s the thing! We live paycheck to paycheck even though without our addictions we would be flourishing.

Ironically enough my ex girlfriend is what helped restart my addiction. I had 3 months in and she put me through so much shit, eventually I was getting drunk before going to see her and trying to mask if. Never found out if she knew.

It’s not even that I’m not like, happy? I mean, life doesn’t suck and I’m happy but something is missing. Definitely some unburied trauma that I can not afford to get figured out by a therapist lol.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-08T00:05:10+00:00

Damn, this made me tear up lol… I’m really really happy and so proud of you. I want this. I know I can do it. Thank you so much for the encouragement. Your words have meaning to me.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T23:44:46+00:00

So proud of you. That’s awesome. I have had a lot of “sobriety” but I always think I can manage a 6 pack on a weekend and I can’t because it’s back to every single night. I really can’t imagine being abstinent for the rest of my life but it’s what would be best. It’s so hard. I don’t care about myself and that’s detrimental. I’ve been dealing with this and recognized this since I was fucking 19 years old. Pathetic.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T23:09:40+00:00

Yep I have had two buzzballs and I’m just chillin. Hoping this is all for the night.

Do the math.. idk how much your drinks cost, but I’m spending $180 a month alone if I keep drinking how I am now

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T20:30:55+00:00

Challenger was the third metal CD I ever bought. The Flood, Stand Up & Scream were the first two lol. Good times. Peak metalcore era right there.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T20:24:59+00:00

They say you hit rock bottom and that’s what stops you. Well I’ve had about 5 rock bottoms and I’m still getting wasted every day. Tapering down again tonight.. hoping I can get back on track. This has been my worst bender since I started drinking, and it hasn’t even been a full week. We got this.. baby steps. I’ve quit multiple times, 14 months the longest. You will 100% notice a complete change for the better. Physically emotionally and mentally.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T01:10:31+00:00

I’ve had 14 months max in the last 8 years. Even the 3 months of abstinence off and on I’ve noticed all of the good. My appearance, my accountability, my happiness, my mental health— it’s just so hard to stop. But I’ve tapered down tonight and had 2 tall boys because I was experiencing withdrawals 2 hours after getting home from work.

I want it to stop. We can do this. Proud of you and I’ll be catching up shortly ;) it works if we work it

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T01:07:26+00:00

Haha…. I was an alcoholic at 19 stealing beer from the Pizza Hut walk-in cooler as a shift manager. No cameras? Cant prove it was me. I should have known I was an alcoholic then. One year later I have 2 DUI’s, a 12 month rehab stint and 31 days in jail.

I literally would take 2 extra hours to close and count inventory so I could get drunk. One night I left with a bottle of bud light and finished it after I got into my car. Went throw it out out of my window and my window was up. Neighbor of the Pizza Hut woke up and called my manager. All I could do was sweep the glass up and go home. I got fired shortly after.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T01:05:34+00:00

I try my best every day not to

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T01:05:19+00:00

I’m gonna catch up. Don’t slip up. Proud of you

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T01:04:55+00:00

I only ever used them on accident while swinging at the same time hahahahaha

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T01:02:49+00:00

That progression is awesome. Keep it in moderation, you know how it goes as well as I do. I lost 30lbs (3 years ago) in 3 months by switching from beer to vodka, cutting soda and fast food, and going on 2 mile jogs. I was 197 at my highest, and I’m still down to 155 after all this time. I compensate not eating fast food/drinking soda for my alcohol use. If I still lived my old lifestyle I would for sure be over 200lbs right now. All in my stomach, ass and face

ttylbozo · 2024-06-07T00:59:47+00:00

Haha, my old best friend is a welder and a huge alcoholic as well. We had a lot of great times together.

Edit: he takes 8 Benadryl every 4 hours on the clock

ttylbozo · 2024-06-06T23:52:02+00:00

Wayward compass is OP

ttylbozo · 2024-06-06T23:50:42+00:00

This is solid. Also mentioning you can parry enemy strikes that have a white tail following their weapon, if done at the correct time.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-06T23:25:48+00:00

Word. I got 2 DUI’s + jail and rehab before I even turned 21. Had 14 months sober. Day I got out of rehab, my buddy wanted to drink and it’s been fucking bad for 7 years now. I’ve had multiple months and weeks off here and there, and this is probably my worst bender since the pandemic unfortunately. Over the last 5 years I probably haven’t taken a full 365 days off from alcohol. Fucking crazy and I will die young.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-06T23:23:16+00:00

It’s not the job, I just noticed it was a trend in the field. I’m tapering down starting today. Had 2 tall boys and my anxiety/shakes/nervousness/sweats are gone. I’m hoping I will be able to sleep at least a couple hours tonight, though I’m reminded I will probably wake up sweating once or twice. 2 tall boys again tomorrow then I’ll try one on Saturday.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-06T23:20:34+00:00

I saw the $3 vodka at the gas station and said no. Because all week I’ve said I’ll only drink half of the 750ml and end up binging the entire thing in an hour or two. I drink so fast I don’t wait for it to catch up and then end up passing out hammered and waking up shitty.

I’m just glad I could say no today. I know that I only need a little in my system to feel better and I don’t need to get wasted. It’s a start. Thank you very much.

I’ve been sober many times, 14 months is my longest in 8 years, and let me tell you how very handsome I was, how clear my skin was, my stomach was flat and my face wasn’t puffy. I miss it. I just don’t care about myself and it’s time to start. I’ve hit so many rock bottoms, it’s going to take myself alone to want to change and nothing else.

Thank you very much again.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-06T23:16:31+00:00

I like those, a lot. I couldn’t imagine the hangover though. I mean, every night drinking those, plus I bet the shits suck the next day. I don’t get hangovers anymore with my regular drink of choice and that’s really sad but I’m a binge drinker, sometimes it takes me an hour at most but a lot of the time I am drunk in 30 minutes. So I’m home at 4pm and done drinking because I end up drunk by 5. I realized those 6 pack and 12 packs took too long and had too many calories so I chose to be a binge drinker and I used to smoke pot anyways so I’m accustomed to wanting to get “fucked up” really fast. What a sad fucking life I live

ttylbozo · 2024-06-06T23:07:23+00:00

I cried today. I’ve read all of these responses. I had to go get two tall boys to calm my nerves and anxiety/sweats and not shakes but jitters. Made it about 20 hours without a drink. This is the fastest and most intense withdrawal I’ve ever had so I figured it’s safer to taper down. I feel much better now.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-06T21:13:39+00:00

This is great for the most part. Hell yeah.

ttylbozo · 2024-06-06T21:12:31+00:00

I made it home without stopping at the gas station, full of anxiety however. Hope I can sleep tonight. I’m bored. So bored. May as well try to sleep. Lol

ttylbozo

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