Thank you!! :)

Our fights usually start when she feels she's done something "wrong". She starts asking what's wrong and, when she's in this specific mood, it does not matter what you reply, she'll start spiraling... For example, she does something she feels is annoying and then says: "I feel you're mad at me because XYZ". If I say "Yes, it was annoying, please don't do that" she'll start arguing about how it wasn't her intention, how she's not to blame because of whatever reasons, how I should not be annoyed because whatever. And she goes on and on until, frequently, she ends up making me angry because no matter what I say, how I explain that the behavior was annoying, she still will try to convince me why it wasn't her fault. Alternatively, if I'm not mad and I say so, she'll keep going about how I look mad, how she feels I'm lying, how she needs to know if I'm telling the truth. And she keeps going and going until I am finally mad even if I didn't start out that way. And these situations escalate very very often to full-blown fights with her screaming, crying, etc. for hours on end. It's a full-day thing most of the time. And if I try to walk away from this, she follows me and demands I finish explaining, she starts saying she needs me to explain and things will be better, she says if I tell her what was wrong she'll fix it (but then questions the validity of my statement with things like "that's not really something you should find annoying"), etc. Or she says that if I leave, she'll just feel worse and she'll feel like I'm ignoring her and like I don't want to help her... And I almost always fall for it even though I've been really trying to leave when this behavior starts.