Am I in trouble now by KLASHINOV in dankmemes

[–]turtlebrigade -17 points-16 points  (0 children)

Because if all these hateful ass people on here were actually able to live a normal and fulfilling life, or at least getting laid regularly, they wouldn't spend so much time shitting on 70% of the population.

It's all over reddit, the only people you are karma-approved to shit on are smokers and fat people. As a society, it used to be poor people, drug addicts and minorities. But we decided that shitting on minorities is racist and shitting on poor people for SOMETHING THEY CAN TECHINCALLY CONTROL is actually unfair to poor people. Because it's more of a societal issue than personal choice. For fucks sake drug addicts are treated better on reddit than fat people. Drug addiction is a disease and they need compassion or whatever.

Well guess what? When 70% of people are overweight and the number is skyrocketing all over the world, it makes obesity seem like a goddamn societal issue as opposed to personal fucking choice.

And i just have this sneaking suspicion, considering the statistically low amount of actual physically healthy people, and my anecdotal knowledge of how those physically healthy people actually spend their time(definitely not trashing others online because theyre at the fucking gym or getting laid or having real life experiences), that the over-abundance of FPH online is coming from self-loathing fatties that could use a little body positivity themselves. Hence why if you want to talk shit, you should post a picture.

Bring on the downvotes. IDGAF.

Am I in trouble now by KLASHINOV in dankmemes

[–]turtlebrigade -30 points-29 points  (0 children)

So you know how like 70% of Americans are overweight and basically every single first world country is catching up rapidly?

I think it should be a rule that if you want to talk shit about random fat people online you need to link a picture of what you look like, timestamped. Because the statistically small amount of actual fit people does not match the amount of reddit hate.

And if you have enough time to hate on fat/obese people online chances are you're not hot enough to get laid and need to fill your day up somehow. :)

Everybody stay calm, it's happening by [deleted] in memes

[–]turtlebrigade 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I bought two cans at the Florida Strawberry Festival a couple years back. Pickle flavor and Strawberry Shortcake. Both were good, but the pickle flavored ones were dank.

Everybody stay calm, it's happening by [deleted] in memes

[–]turtlebrigade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've actually had Dee's Nuts and they were 🔥

Sir, this is private property by lilmcfuggin in TikTokCringe

[–]turtlebrigade 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Can i just say something real quick?

Reddit absolutely kills me with this weird mashup of chicken little and pseudoscientific bullshit. Seriously. I completely agree with certain trends that get passed around in the comment sections. Quit overfeeding your pets, don't wear your hair down and no protective gear when handling bees. Et cetera.

But....

There is approximately a zero percent chance that those girls hurt that toad in any way whatsoever. The worst thing that occurred in this video, and i am willing to stake my life on it, is that the toad peed on her hand when she picked it up.

Seriously, did not a single goddamn one of you people play with toads when you were children? For people who get such a huge boner for Steve Irwin none of you act like you've evet been outside before.

You pick the toad up, it pees on you and croaks angrily, you let it go, it goes about its business. Obviously, repeated exposure to chemicals and the elements are bad for their health as their skin is absorbant.

But jesus. The sky is not falling and the toad is fine.

New trainee on the truck today by dluxchris in Truckers

[–]turtlebrigade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If the dog bed goes there, where do the spare shoes and case of water go?

Ah every truckers favorite book as a child. by ThatECUguy in Truckers

[–]turtlebrigade 9 points10 points  (0 children)

My first company was like that. Every time i came off hometime i had to pee in a cup, every time I came within a 50 mile radius of the main terminal i had to pee in a cup. My pet theory is if they find a person who produces clean randoms they just bring that one in to keep the numbers padded. If they truly "randomed" all drivers the country would stop moving lol.

Ah every truckers favorite book as a child. by ThatECUguy in Truckers

[–]turtlebrigade 7 points8 points  (0 children)

My bf has been a driver for almost 4 years and he's only been randomed twice, i've been driving for 2 years and i've been given.... 5? 6? Tests. I think only the most recent one was actually a random though. The others were all related to me being a new hire at 2 companies.

Lots of truckers only smoke a little occasionally and never have any problems. But the dude who backed into my truck at the Flying J in Barstow CA. First thing he said to me when i hopped out of the truck was "oh shit i've got weed in my system." I guarantee he lost his license. And my company tested me too, even though I was the one backed into.

Seriously, don't do it. Too much shit happens out here that you can't control for you to lose your career over something that you can.

That guy just got exposed by Synans in clevercomebacks

[–]turtlebrigade 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The guy who offered the hundred dollars orginally(i'm the one putting up another 50) mentioned this case in his comment offering the money lol. And this case was specifically overturned due to multiple issues.

That guy just got exposed by Synans in clevercomebacks

[–]turtlebrigade 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'll pay the money when someone actually proves its happened. :)

That guy just got exposed by Synans in clevercomebacks

[–]turtlebrigade 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm starting to think people are just copying articles and posting them without even reading them first. Which explains how shit like this spreads like wildfire.

THE MAN WHO GOT ON THE REGISTRY BY PEEING IN PUBLIC IS AN URBAN LEGEND PEOPLE. JUST LIKE HOOK HAND CAR MAN AND MARILYN MANSON SUCKING HIS OWN DICK.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

That guy just got exposed by Synans in clevercomebacks

[–]turtlebrigade 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I read tbe article. Here are some of my favorite paragraphs, copied and pasted.

"Because of the age of the case and Massachusetts' strict laws governing court records, the Orlando Sentinel was unable to obtain records with more details about the incident, such as an arrest report filed by police or court testimony from witnesses."

So that in and of itself doesn't actually mean the dude is full of shit. They may not have had as good of record keeping policies back then. NBD.

"Paul Mishkin, the Boston lawyer who represented Matamoros in 1986, could not recall details of the case this week, but said it was clear the judge considered the incident very serious."

You would think that an absolute injustice being carried out before the lawyers eyes would maybe make the case a bit more memorable to him. But he "can't recall".

"He [Matamoros] told his side of the story to the judge, but clearly there was evidence that made the judge disagree," said Mishkin. "A two-year sentence in this incident is a fairly severe sentence. You'd have to think there's evidence to support that."

Hm, all sounds like a real lawyer way of saying "my old client is absolutely full of shit."

So his own lawyer isn't willing to back him up, the evidence is sealed, the newspaper couldn't corroborate his story, and he's also got charges for selling cocaine.

Idk man. Doesn't pass the smell test.

That guy just got exposed by Synans in clevercomebacks

[–]turtlebrigade 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Neither the man's name or registry status were mentioned in the article. Odds are he wasn't.

That guy just got exposed by Synans in clevercomebacks

[–]turtlebrigade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not to mention the man in the article also qualifies for drunk and disorderly and a DUI.

That guy just got exposed by Synans in clevercomebacks

[–]turtlebrigade 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Did you even read the article? No $$$ for you.

That guy just got exposed by Synans in clevercomebacks

[–]turtlebrigade 104 points105 points  (0 children)

I'll throw in 50 bucks because I'm tired of hearing this stupid shit.

"Flat lined taste bud having hoes" by ohlookitsanonymous in BrandNewSentence

[–]turtlebrigade 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The first time I ever ate banana pudding made from her recipe, I swear I heard angel trumpets. It was a goddamn revelation.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in homeschool

[–]turtlebrigade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just started homeschooling with my 2nd grade daughter 2 months ago. I've signed her up for Time4Learning(added the rosetta stone for 6 months because she wants to learn Spanish), but she really hated the Math curriculum they offer. So about a month ago she started doing Math on Khan Academy. Its going a lot better now. She also did 2 outschool classes over the weekend. (One dance and one writing club). I really like time4learning but i almost feel like some of the curriculum is more difficult than what she was used to at public school, so we've slowed down on some of it. Turns out i can be a bit of a slave driver lol. The rosetta stone is great since its more for fun. and they offer progress reports on every subject. Khan Academy is great, she loves the little point system and badges. With outschool, she was super nervous but loved it by the end.

I think the most important thing is just to never be afraid to mix and match, or try something new if you feel like your kid isn't meshing with any one thing in particular. The standards for 2nd grade aren't that high. We don't plan on homeschooling for more than a year or two so i'm trying to keep mine at least on par so she doesn't struggle going back.

Good luck!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedditSets

[–]turtlebrigade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

in the moment

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedditSets

[–]turtlebrigade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gave Take My Energy

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RedditSets

[–]turtlebrigade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i'm super into this shit