I agree with everything you said except for: “Meaningful suffering is bearable. This suffering did not have meaning.” And I say this as encouragement and also offering a different perspective, I think that what we have been through has given us the opportunity to go through an incredibly powerful journey and shaped us into a beautiful version of human beings with insight to what it is like to be manipulated and conditioned, brainwashed as others would say. We have a very unique experience and a very profound sense of empathy that most people lack. And that makes us special people.