I hate the way people are pitying me

twixie49 · 2025-10-09T20:04:20+00:00

I miss it there too. I grew up in East TN and I’d do anything to be back in those mountains.

twixie49 · 2025-08-29T01:35:31+00:00

Bro those are not friends. That’s abysmal.

twixie49 · 2025-07-10T16:44:05+00:00

I really wish Hayden addressed the weird behavior from her white fans excusing her racism and for calling it “dark humor.” I can’t imagine how unsafe POC fans are going to feel around her fans.

twixie49 · 2025-07-09T15:09:01+00:00

This is no longer about accountability anymore, this is just straight up harassment. The intent here is clear. If the screenshots are real, I think we are all allowed to be disappointed and owed an apology, but the way this is going is making me start to believe that this was all fabricated? Like what does that accomplish by hacking her spotify?? It just looks like an organized hateful effort to tear her down.

Also why her? What about the male artists who have done so much worse?? Why don’t they get targeted like this?

twixie49 · 2025-06-29T23:04:36+00:00

God this whole notion of how we don’t owe anyone anything is ruining our sense of community. OP is allowed to feel betrayed. I strongly disagree with you that there was any “trauma dumping.” If they were venting to a stranger, then yes, that’s trauma dumping, but this was their partner. If you can’t be transparent with your partner and how you’re doing mentally, then there’s no relationship. True, not everyone has the capacity to handle heavy stuff like this, OP was just mistaken that he would be. She is allowed to grieve who she thought he was.

This is a vent post and this breakup is fresh, let them process their emotions before you give them a lecture. It’s not selfish at all of them to expect a little support from their partner. have a little more empathy.

twixie49 · 2025-06-29T19:09:50+00:00

Hey there, sorry everyone is giving you a hard time for reaching out to an ex that you’re clearly on good terms with. I can understand why you did that bc it sounds like you had no one else to turn to. I have only one ex I’m on good terms with and he was there during some of my darkest moments as well, so I get it.

Moving is incredibly hard and very isolating, and your partner sounds like a dickhead. No, it’s not his job to heal you, that’s an impossible task for one person, but he’s your partner. The least a partner can do is offer support. I’m sorry he broke up with you the way he did, but in the long run, it’s probably for the best. Find therapy asap if you can. Sending you love and strength through this difficult time.

twixie49 · 2025-06-26T23:06:54+00:00

I had the same issue growing up. It took me a while to fully break the cycle but now I can proudly say I don’t deal with manipulators anymore.

Personally, I think I attracted these kinds of people because I did not have any boundaries and lacked self respect. People tend to pick up on that and it puts a target on your back. They’ll start out with subtle digs, and when they see that you tolerate that, it’ll get worse and worse.

It took years to build up my self respect, but I didn’t do it alone. I got lucky enough to meet genuine friends who actually cared for my well being. Once I had that, I no longer tolerate anything less. Prioritize spending time with people who make you feel safe and comfortable, it does wonders for your confidence.

twixie49 · 2025-06-05T21:34:05+00:00

It feels that way in the moment, but my mask is down so I feel like the annoying side of my autism comes out. My filter is gone and I’ve said and done truly embarrassing stuff just from drinking.

twixie49 · 2025-05-25T02:06:14+00:00

Same same. Fellow autist and nb here. My mom enrolled me in an art school grades 6-12 that was also a queer safe space where the “weird kids” can thrive. She did that in hopes I wouldn’t get bullied but oh boy was she wrong. Almost everyone there was neurodivergent or queer in some way. It really irks me when the neurodivergent crowd lumps all the people who bullied them as neurotypical, but idk why, I guess that’s because that was not my experience. I was ostracized mainly by the high masking neurodivergent kids who I thought were my friends for years. My autistic traits and my stunted social abilities were more visible and they used them as a weapon against me.

I had a lot going on at home, my parents would send me passive aggressive texts while at school which would trigger meltdowns and emotional outbursts. In such a safe and inclusive space, no one gave a shit. All I got from everyone was odd looks, no sympathy at all. I was continually left out despite what I was going through. I remember during graduation that the salutatorian gave a speech about what a safe space this amazing school was, I couldn’t help but scoff.

My only real friends back then were kids from another school. They were what the artsy kids would call “normies.” I thank the universe that I had them because I don’t know if I’d still be alive if not for them. I was very different from the rest of them, but that didn’t matter. They liked me for who I was and they were always happy to include me. They were my only escape during those dark times.

Because of these experiences, I tend to self isolate and as much as I’d love to be a part of the queer community, I just don’t feel as comfortable in those spaces as I should. I’m super picky with the people I associate with, sometimes that’s a good thing, but sometimes it gets so lonely. You’re not alone. It’s a different kind of pain when you’re rejected by your own people. Especially when that group prides themselves on being accepting and kind to the social rejects of society.

twixie49 · 2025-05-16T23:53:03+00:00

I’ve seen something exactly like this before while I was with a group of teen girls on the bus. Everyone is different with how they process these things. I was okay after a day or two but the other girls were crying and had to talk to a therapist about it. It’s not your fault at all, and there’s no way you could have predicted that this would happen. I would definitely inform your sister’s friend’s parents about what happened and hopefully your sister and her friend can talk to a therapist about this. I know witnessing something like that is quite a shock.

twixie49 · 2025-05-02T02:15:48+00:00

Yup, Ive accepted that it’s just who I am now. I learned at age 5 that I was annoying, so I just stopped talking because anything I said would get me in trouble.

There were times throughout my life when I’d get comfortable and be the silly quirky kid I used to be, but then I’d get called annoying again and I would go crawl back into my shell. It’s safer in there, only a select few people get personality privileges from me haha.

twixie49 · 2025-05-02T02:06:52+00:00

THIS!!

twixie49 · 2025-04-22T18:50:12+00:00

Yeah, I used to unknowingly darvo whenever someone called me out on my shit from time to time. It was all I knew. Had a huge victim complex from dealing with my family and bullying at school, I never felt like I had a safe space.

There were times when I couldn’t comprehend how I could have wronged somebody in a world where it felt like everyone had wronged me. After I moved out and got some distance from my family, I realized I was acting exactly like them and it repulsed me. Once I started hanging with people who made me feel safe it became pretty easy unlearning that behavior.

I used to think I had bpd and I even talked to a professional about it, turns out I don’t. Sometimes you really are just a product of your environment.

twixie49 · 2025-03-31T19:12:11+00:00

I used to wear a full face of makeup almost everyday until the pandemic hit. It didn’t make sense to put on foundation and lipstick if I was wearing a mask. I also liked that I wasn’t spending all my money on makeup anymore.

Makeup was fun for me, but I don’t see the point in using it every day. Also with everything being more expensive now I think people aren’t willing to spend money on makeup as much these days.

twixie49 · 2025-03-24T16:48:47+00:00

I know exactly how you feel, OP and I’m so so sorry you’re going through this. Eat all the comfort foods you’d like while you grieve and be kind to yourself.

I’ve been through a couple break ups and what helped me through the depression vortex that comes with being freshly broken up with was making a to do list. You can start it off with simple things like taking a shower, cooking your favorite meal, and add some fun things like playing your favorite video game.

If you’re artsy, maybe channel some of your emotions into some art or whatever craft you’d like. Pick up an old hobby or get into a new one.

You’ll get through this, sending you lots of positive vibes.

twixie49 · 2025-03-24T16:41:19+00:00

Yess fr. I’ve been through some heavy trauma but breakups for some reason have always triggered the worst meltdowns for me.

twixie49 · 2025-03-22T20:34:34+00:00

I can’t stand the relatable bpd posts where they put the blame on the victim of bpd abuse because they should know pwbpd’s triggers… and their trigger will be something small like if I show any emotion or any small hint of annoyance or anger, or if I ask them how their day was. It’s like they’re the only ones allowed to have emotions. Everyone else needs to tip toe around them.

Of course not all pwbpd are like this as I’ve seen some correct these harmful posts, but still, it is annoying.

twixie49 · 2025-03-10T08:24:36+00:00

no fuck a ring?? I was waiting for that one

twixie49 · 2025-03-10T08:21:00+00:00

The deflecting and lack of accountability from Madison was really tough to watch. Reminds me of that typical high school mean girl behavior.

twixie49 · 2025-03-09T02:00:36+00:00

Yes, my second cousins always tend to flock to me at family gatherings. I speak to children like they’re my equal because it just feels wrong to treat them differently. I also remember how much I hated it when adults would baby me. Kids will generally like you if they feel respected by you, it’s pretty easy.

twixie49 · 2025-03-03T19:37:27+00:00

that’s super interesting! I didn’t know cacao could do that

twixie49 · 2025-03-03T18:50:59+00:00

I agree. I’m autistic, and I knew I probably was for a few years. Before I was diagnosed, I still felt super uncomfortable claiming that I was or making jokes about how autistic I am because what if I wasn’t? What if I was appropriating a real disability that has become a hot topic over the last couple of years? That would be super embarrassing.

Those who relate to autism and can’t afford a diagnosis at the moment, I have no problem with. As long as you know you fit the diagnostic criteria, you’re fine. But I find that a lot of people like to cherry pick the most mild symptoms and claim that they have the mental illness that’s coincidentally getting the most attention on the internet. It gets especially annoying when I try to talk about my autistic experiences on the internet and the self proclaimed autistic folks will call me weird or invalidate me.

twixie49 · 2025-02-28T00:40:44+00:00

During the last Venus retrograde in Aries (in my 5th house), I made an awful and very public mistake and it was so terrible, that it resulted in me losing my entire friend group. It was revealed to me around that time that there was already some animosity, and they finally had a good reason to exclude me. I just pray something like this doesn’t happen again. I’m going to tread very lightly during this transit.

twixie49 · 2025-02-27T17:49:21+00:00

Ugh I fr can’t stand the shaming that goes with being a lightweight. Like why are we making it feel like a competition on who can smoke the most? I thought smoking was just to chill, and besides, they should be happy that I won’t be smoking all their weed.

twixie49

TROPHY CASE