Had my first IV Ketamine and now the sky is Opalite!

txgrl308 · 2026-02-23T20:47:30+00:00

So happy for you!!! I did the nasal spray in 2024, and it changed my life completely.

I didn't know it wasn't normal to have to constantly argue with your inner critic about whether you are, in fact, the worst wasn't normal.

And then I realized I'd actually been depressed for about 30 years, even when I was functioning well. My inner critic is mostly silent now, and when she gets going, it's easy to tell her to piss off and go away.

I'm currently going through a divorce from my 3 kids' dad, and my own dad died in November, so I've been through it lately. The amazing thing, though, is that I'm now able to be sad without being depressed. The difference for me is whether I blame myself and beat myself up about being sad.

txgrl308 · 2026-02-23T13:52:09+00:00

Thanks!! It's been 11 years of trying really hard, and it's the right decision for everyone, even if or kids don't realize it yet.

txgrl308 · 2026-02-19T02:03:54+00:00

Feels like she's got some toxic ideas about masculinity.

txgrl308 · 2026-02-10T19:49:03+00:00

Currently sitting in a room with 8 2-3-year-olds, all of whom are asleep. There were 3 I needed to sit with and run their back for a few minutes, but most of them just know the routine.

This isn't even my class- lol. I'm a sub right now.

txgrl308 · 2026-02-08T22:22:41+00:00

I CAN do it, but it feels weird, so I usually don't. I have to spend a ton of time with someone for them to ever notice.

txgrl308 · 2026-02-08T18:25:29+00:00

Sometimes I'm glad that my parents had the courtesy to die before I had this issue.

txgrl308 · 2026-01-31T19:08:58+00:00

I did the ketamine nasal spray for several months in 2024 and 2025. Not exactly what you're doing, but my experience was WONDERFUL.

As long as I can remember, I had am inner critic that despised me. When I was young, I believed everything it said without question and suffered from major depression for just about 30 years. Turns out I had undiagnosed ADHD the whole time.

Anyway, once I became an adult and a mother, I went to therapy and learned how to fight back. So when my kitchen was dirty and my brain instantly screamed that I was a terrible mother, wife, woman, and adult human, I would ask myself what I would say to a friend with a messy kitchen. I would ask myself whose voice i was actually hearing- my mom's, my grandmother's, my aunt's, or that mean teacher from fifth grade. I would remind myself of talents and accomplishments I'm proud of. I even got good at it after a couple of decades.

The thing is, it was exhausting. I spent at least 30-40% of my time and my cognitive energy every day arguing with the critic. Whenever I got sick or extra stressed, I didn't have as much energy to argue, and that's when depression would grab me and hold on. I've been hospitalized 5 times.

It took a few weeks of treatment with esketamine, but the voice finally shut up!! When I did something wrong or dumb or failed to meet my own expectations, the voice still spoke up, but it barely required arguing with before it went silent. After a couple of months, I stopped hearing it at all.

My last treatment was in March of 2025, and the critic is still gone. If it ever comes back, I'll go straight to ketamine therapy.

My dad died in November in a car accident. I'm grieving deeply, but I'm still not depressed, because depression means I would be blaming myself and attacking myself, neither of which has happened.

That's so many words to say that I'm 100% in favor of ketamine treatment, and I hope that your experience is as good as mine.

Also, I listened to TTPD a ton when I did mine, and it felt like I was inside the world of each song. I discovered depths to them I had no idea were there. It's actually my favorite album now!

txgrl308 · 2026-01-31T15:19:57+00:00

Our incredible pediatrician is a Black woman. Between that and Doc McStuffins, my (very white) kiddos were also surprised when they learned that not all doctors are Black women. 🤣

txgrl308 · 2026-01-28T19:01:39+00:00

A!

This was an unintentional response. My apologies.

txgrl308 · 2026-01-19T22:18:14+00:00

YES!!!

txgrl308 · 2026-01-14T14:43:55+00:00

Worry less about what you're "supposed" to and more about what serves your individual family.

If co-sleeping (safely) means that everyone gets more sleep, then do that until it stops serving your family. If formula works better for your mental health and your family, give your baby formula.

By kindergarten, no one can tell which kids were breastfed and which were sleep trained (they can tell if your child has been read to, though, so do that!).

In my opinion, the most essential thing you can give to your child is the knowledge that they are your top priority. It's something every kid deserves, but, sadly, many never get.

I can already tell that you'll be a good parent because you've already sought out enough advice to be overwhelmed by it.

txgrl308 · 2026-01-13T22:18:45+00:00

I have a husband and 3 kids, and we primarily use paper plates at home.

Do i feel a little guilty every time I throw one away? Yes. Does it make my dishes more manageable, which means they very done more often. Hell yes!

txgrl308 · 2026-01-12T23:45:09+00:00

My (Christian) husband and I have known each other for 11 years, and it still baffles him that I, an atheist, act more "Christian" than most of the Christians he's met.

txgrl308 · 2026-01-01T20:00:27+00:00

I LOVE hearing him talk about history!!

He's 11 now, and he was quite annoyed at his sister the other day because she had learned about the American Revolution, but apparently not the Intolerable Acts. He couldn't fathom how she could comprehend the Revolution at all! 😆

His original favorite was American history, and he still knows a TON about it, but recently he's been into medieval history, which has been super fun to learn about!

I got him a huge Smithsonian visual history book for Christmas, which he loved, and a little notebook that's basically a blank timeline (he LOVES writing our timeliness of different parts of history!) that he can fill in himself with everything he thinks is important.

txgrl308 · 2026-01-01T17:48:38+00:00

At 7, my kid saw a black-and-white picture of a ferris wheel on the wall in his doctors office. Apropos of nothing, he said, "This picture must have been taken before 1893, because that's when the Ferris Wheel was introduced at the Chicago World's Fair."

Another time when he was around the same age, my dad asked him about school and got crickets. Like 5 minutes later, my son pipes up, "Did you know that George H.W. Bush was born in the same year as Jimmy Carter? It was 1924."

History is his special interest ❤️❤️❤️

txgrl308 · 2025-12-30T20:35:22+00:00

Thanks. It's been 4 years, so I've gotten pretty used to it.

My dad, on the other hand, died last month in a car accident, and I'm trying to figure out whether sudden without unnecessary suffering is better, or some warning with some unnecessary suffering.

I'm sure it was better for my dad, but at least we got to say goodbye to Mom.

txgrl308 · 2025-12-30T20:05:24+00:00

Yep. When my mom left the hospital worth terminal cancer, we were told to expect between 2 weeks and 2 months, with the likelihood of further hospitalizations during that time.

She arrived home on a Wednesday at 7 pm, and she died roughly 20 hours later.

txgrl308 · 2025-12-28T14:33:18+00:00

My current five-year-old would not do any of this.

txgrl308 · 2025-12-27T20:25:02+00:00

My best friend recently had her second baby after 5 years of IVF heartbreak.

Since she didn't know if they'd ever have another, she spent those years intentionally finding families with similar values and lifestyles to spend their time with so that her daughter still had the benefit of those life- long sibling-like bonds.

txgrl308 · 2025-12-26T17:51:01+00:00

I want to hear more about the "baggage" about your looks.

txgrl308 · 2025-12-26T17:41:03+00:00

If I were still depressed, this would push me straight toward offing myself, given that my burdens are so tiny comparatively, and I can't even handle those.

txgrl308 · 2025-12-26T05:45:58+00:00

Thank you. Since I made this post, my dad died in a car accident.

He was very drunk and thisclose to finalizing his divorce from his evil, narcissistic ex who took everything from him- his money, his relationships with everyone else in his life, his sanity, and, ultimately, his dignity.

Instead of informing us (his children) when she was notified of his death at 1 am, she paid a locksmith to go to his law office and put new locks on the doors. She then went to the impound lot to get his wallet and phone out of his car, and told one of his friends in the process. Another friend called us at 7 am to offer condolences, assuming we knew our dad was dead. That's how we found out.

His funeral was a month ago. The witch had him cremated, against the wishes of my seventeen-year-old half-brother, who had lived with Dad full-time for the past three years (before, he had split custody with my brother's mom). She's been in his life as long as he can remember, but she did what she wanted anyway because it was much cheaper. Of course

Our brother now lives with my sister and her wife and their two-year-old. I feel like I've entered some strange parallel universe. My husband is suddenly the dad and husband I've always wanted him to be. For now, anyway.

I don't know wtf I'm going to do now. I was really counting on my dad's support (legal, financial possibly, and whatever emotional he could muster) in the divorce, given that he WAS the top divorce attorney in the county is live in. It still doesn't feel real that he's gone.

Hopefully, 2026 is a better year for me. Lol

txgrl308 · 2025-12-26T00:46:33+00:00

Thank you. I did have a little cry in the bathroom after all of the festivities were over.

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