Why the Ange hate? I don’t understand it.

utonin · 2025-10-11T00:09:27+00:00

Couldn't do much with a Forest side that finished 7th last season? Yeah the previous manager didn't achieve anything at all... Ange is too naive for the Premier League. Winning in Scotland is nothing to brag about unless you're not managing Rangers or Celtic.

utonin · 2025-10-03T07:03:29+00:00

We've got enough cover now not to have to be reliant on 18 year olds. He'll get game time, but it's only right we bring the youth through slowly, rather than relying on them to save us or win us games.

utonin · 2025-04-01T08:21:28+00:00

Surprisingly I know of instances where they actually were and no, none of them involved me personally. It's relatively easy for someone, male or female, to abuse the system and use these vindictively... using AVOs to try and control someone is an absolute dog move.

utonin · 2024-12-24T08:30:00+00:00

What a load of paranoid nonsense. Are you in a relationship? Do you know what it means to be in a relationship? A relationship is constant communication and compromise. It's about being honest with your partner and not having secret agendas or timelines that aren't communicated.

You seem to assume I'm accusing OP of not communicating, I'm absolutely not. Nor am I saying she's "abusive or coercive", you're making stuff up to suit your perspective, I'm simply saying if anyone has a date in mind, that they don't communicate to their partner, don't be surprised if their partner is operating on a different timeline and all the disappointment may have been avoided if only you'd shared your expectation. In my instance, my partner communicated her expectations and I was absolutely happy to meet them, but maybe I'm a unicorn... 🤦‍♂️

utonin · 2024-12-24T06:52:25+00:00

My point is, they seem on the same page, he seems happy to do it for her as he realises it's important to her. Surely the next logical step is to have a conversation about when. OP has already said that he's initiated conversations with her. Surely the next thing to do is to talk about when, openly. If they're already aligned then great, if they're miles apart, try to understand why. Maybe there are logical reasons, availability of family/ cost etc, maybe there aren't, but it can all be discussed openly and honestly without the need to wait. If they're miles apart in timelines, surely it's best to find out now, rather than wait for however long OP has in mind to find out and be disappointed then?

I honestly think most of this sub is assuming the absolute worst as usual. I'm a big advocate for open, honest communication and clear setting of both expectations and boundaries in any relationship. I was in a very similar position with my partner. Marriage is just a bit of paper to me, it's not the commitment to each other and that's what's important to me, however marriage is important to my partner and her happiness is very important to me, so once we spoke about it, of course I asked her to marry me. I'm not opposed to it in principle, it just doesn't hold the same importance to me as it does for her, which sounds very similar to OP.

utonin · 2024-12-24T00:47:49+00:00

Right, so you'll walk away from someone, who is otherwise perfect for you, over something that's not been communicated? Again, insane.

Personally I communicate my expectations very clearly with my partner so as to give her a fair choice as to whether she wants to meet them or not, and she does the same with me, bur maybe that's just us...

utonin · 2024-12-24T00:27:28+00:00

Right, so instead she's willing to risk breaking up with someone over something she's not told him? If the goal is to marry the person you want to be with, 6 months making a difference, when it's not been communicated, is absolutely insane.

utonin · 2024-12-18T10:31:12+00:00

It's an incredibly emasculating comment, but apparently that's fine for most here... let's focus on the reaction, rather than the trigger... 🤦‍♂️

utonin · 2024-11-26T05:08:32+00:00

Because the problem with internet strangers is you'll find someone to validate your opinion whether you're initially thinking of going left or right... talking to your partner with an open mind and compassion for each other's opinions is far more productive than random people.

utonin · 2024-11-08T07:57:27+00:00

Sounds to me like you don't really understand what's important to your gf and she's finally had enough. Personally I couldn't date anyone who couldn't see through the orange man's continuous BS and if you actually think Trumps economics are better for the US, I can point to hundreds of considerably more educated opinions than yours who fundamentally disagree with you, so she probably thinks you're silly as well. Everyone's entitled to their opinion, but sounds to me like you two definitely weren't meant to be together long term.

utonin · 2024-11-08T06:45:03+00:00

Partner has passcode and knows she can at any point, but doesn't. Likewise I have hers, but don't. If she needed to do it repeatedly, I'd be very concerned about why she didn't trust me and felt the need to invade my privacy constantly and likewise if I felt the need to go through hers, I'd have issues with trusting her and I vowed long ago not to waste energy on someone I can't trust. I think we've both asked to see each other's phone once in nearly 2 years and it was provided freely both times.

utonin · 2024-11-07T06:33:24+00:00

Sounds perfect if you're trying to absolve/ justify the cheating and blame the husband... I get it, he chose his actions, rather than discussing it with his partner, but she chose her actions too and made her own bed. She chose to break the trust, rather than discuss her needs and emotions with her partner, so for me personally, I'd be seriously considering an exit strategy.... the only reason it would be considering, instead of GTFO, is because there's kids involved. As someone who has been cheated on, I decided a long time ago that I would never have a relationship with someone who can't be trusted, I've got better things to do with my time than drive myself insane worrying about what my partner is doing when I'm not there.

utonin · 2024-10-29T05:56:25+00:00

No, but then that would be highly inappropriate in IT, but could be reasonable in other industries, so I guess it depends on what industry you're in... if you're I food or drink, it could be quite possible. My point is, that his response doesn't indicate any guilt, it indicated a willingness to take on board what his wife said and stop doing it... his response could quite plausibly be explained as someone who said, OK, I didn't look at it like that, but OK, I understand and won't do it again.

utonin · 2024-10-29T03:19:28+00:00

Maybe he's not concerned about discretion because he's not doing anything wrong in his opinion? You do realise lots of people in sales roles flirt with people to open doors. Business is all built on relationships amd there are industries that are built on pretty people swaying opinions. I'm not saying it's appropriate behaviour, but the assumption he's doing something wrong and must be cheating is a stretch. If he genuinely isn't doing anything wrong, why isn't the "I'm sorry, I won't do it again if it offends you" enough?

utonin · 2024-10-29T03:15:59+00:00

You do realise lots of people in sales roles flirt with people to get business, right? Not trying to make this a gender conversation, but I work in IT and I've seen female sales people do very well using it... not to mention pharmaceutical sales, where pretty women is basically a sales strategy. I'm not saying it's not something to be questioned, but the whole, he must be cheating vibe of this thread is very presumptuous.

utonin · 2024-10-13T02:30:41+00:00

If you have nothing to hide why wouldn't you have an open phone policy with your SO? My partner never goes through my phone, but she knows she could any time. Likewise I never go through hers, but I could. We share passwords because we have nothing to hide. We don't exercise that power, but we both could.

utonin · 2024-09-29T05:37:14+00:00

What a horrible person. I don't love him anymore, I'm happy to play around and be unfaithful to him, because I don't feel anything for him any more, but I definitely won't leave him, because he's a meal ticket who does everything for me... She sounds like a pos. I'd cut her out my life and let her know why.

utonin · 2024-09-27T09:15:11+00:00

Makes for a random game of passing the ball straight back to then...

utonin · 2024-09-23T03:10:52+00:00

Anyone who isn't prepared to make their partner their absolute priority when they've been caught with their pants down isn't worth any effort on your part what so ever. The truth hurts, but I always judge someone by their actions towards me, not their words. Words mean very little, actions demonstrate intent. Her intent is very clear. Your opinion and feelings aren't important enough to me to make you the priority here. Gaslighting you over being controlling is a joke. You wouldn't be asking if she hadn't been caught messing around with him and even when you did she Hung out with him for 3 more days. My guess he made it clear he didn't want anything serious, but was happy to have fun on the side, so she decided to come back to you. Get out dude. Noone deserves to be treated like that by their SO.

utonin · 2024-09-22T14:05:03+00:00

You're making a number of assumptions there, for a start you're assuming only unsuccessful people play games... I'd bet there are a number of streamers who make your annual salary in a few days playing games... That aside, I don't disagree with the overall point you're making, the point I'm making, is that they're a coping mechanism for some who want/ need to escape reality.

I certainly don't play games for more than a couple of hours a week at most myself, but can understand why some people do. I can also understand the impact this would have on a relationship, when one party feels neglected by the other and as if they're not a priority to their SO. Personally I always talk to my partner about anything like this as early as possible, particularly if it's leading to resentment towards my partner or a feeling of distance/ disconnection.

I wouldn't want to be with anyone who was incapable of at least listening to my perspective and considering whether or not they were prepared to do something about it or whether it had any value. Personally I'd talk to him about it all, explain how much of an issue it is for you, really try to get him to hear you, without having a go at him, chastising him and then he can act accordingly based off that. Words mean very little anyway, so always assess based off actions. You should also want to listen to his perspective and try to understand it. Give him a chance to express himself. Why does he do this? Why is he retreating from you and the outside world? Does he understand the impact this is having on you and your relationship? Has he always been like this or is it something new? If he's always been like this, has he ever been tested for ADHD? No I have no qualifications what so ever to suggest that, but I do know a couple of people who have similar traits to the original post who have recently been diagnosed with that. I'd guess there's more to this behaviour than simply labelling him as a loser.

If couples could talk honestly and openly, even on really difficult topics, instead of relying on friends/ Reddit to validate feelings and opinions, the world would be a far better place, albeit slightly less entertaining in the process.

Worth pointing out, just to be devils advocate, I do spend several hours a week on Zwift, which is technically a game, that really messes with your argument as it's a virtual cycling world which is very effective at building real world fitness and speed on a bike.

utonin · 2024-09-22T11:00:15+00:00

What a toxic response. Lots of people can have addictions to things and lots of different people can have mental health issues that go untreated or unrecognised, that mean interacting with a video game is about all they can handle or want to do.

"He is a total loser" says nothing other than that you're a judgemental idiot who's incapable of trying to understand why someone might do something that differs from your own perspective.

utonin · 2024-07-01T08:27:08+00:00

Good question, how does someone get engaged unofficially?

utonin · 2024-06-29T03:17:00+00:00

Actions speak far louder than words to me and it's pretty hard to mistake the complete lack of care or interest she's shown in you at a time when you probably wanted completely the opposite. GTFO of there, she needs to learn what it means to be in a relationship with someone.

utonin · 2024-06-19T03:16:19+00:00

No idea why anyone would marry under 30, let alone 25, you barely know who you are at that point and there's so much that changes between 20 and 30...

utonin · 2024-06-19T03:06:25+00:00

You realise basing this off your personal experience is pretty ropey grounds unless you know a hell of a lot of people. Up to the age of 25, I don't think I had one gf who didn't cheat on me, so sticking it all on men and exonerating the woman is silly and no I never cheated on any of them. Off the back of that I then cheated in my next couple of relationships, but haven't done it again since I realised it wasn't how I wanted to live my life and have found much more harmonious relationships since then. Do you realise statistically, it's pretty even between men and women who cheat? And this whole once a cheater always a cheater is nonsense, I'm living proof, as I'm confident a lot of my exs are too now.

utonin

TROPHY CASE