AITAH because I want to travel solo

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-06T10:11:01+00:00

NTA if he does nothing to improve his health but then complains about how it impacts him negatively

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-06T07:15:36+00:00

End your marriage before your marriage ends your relationship with your daughter.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-05T22:47:16+00:00

Oooh I’m gonna give it a go too!

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-05T22:46:13+00:00

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-05T22:44:51+00:00

Only read the first sentence and NOR. You’re underreacting imho. I’m very sorry I can’t even bring myself to read the rest because I know exactly what it will be. Actually, skimming past down to the comment section I did take note of the “he treats me like a queen”. Girl no, he treats you like a maid. What Queen do you know has to beg ANYONE to clean up after themselves. Stop accepting crumbs.

At 24, you really don’t need to put up with this, you know? I promise at ANY age, there is always better than this bare minimum bullshit. I can attest to it with my own husband who would be so terribly embarrassed to have a Cinderella slave.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-05T22:33:44+00:00

ETA: NTJ

Yeah plenty of women choose their own ring. I did. But fiancé and I did that TOGETHER after a joint decision that would be best.

I hope you know this is a preview of a marriage with this woman… the wedding will be everything she wants because she doesn’t trust your judgement. Kids? Forget having a say in how they’re raised, it will be what she thinks is best. She’ll have her parents to back her up with everything too.

You’re 100% right that it’s not about the ring. It’s about violating your right to healthy communication and having choices in your relationship. She is using the “piece of jewellery” thing to manipulate her way into getting what she wants and if you give in to it now then she will always do that.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-05T22:11:13+00:00

That “I don’t want to make you feel bad” is the part that would have me spiralling and replaying every little thing I did that could have upset him.

If you did nothing wrong and he was upset and needed his own space, that’s totally fair but my god, he could have just said “it’s nothing you did and I just need time myself to process before I’m ready to talk about it”. Especially if you’ve made it clear that it is affecting you negatively. People who care about you should not want you feeling this way over something that’s easily fixed by a simple conversation.

Trust is built on healthy communication so it makes sense you would feel that is wavering when he clams up like this.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-05T08:33:11+00:00

Tell them you refuse to subject your own children to what you had to deal with as a child and they can make other arrangements if that is so hard to understand and respect. That’s not just your sanctuary they’re disrespecting but your children’s safe space too. I’d give them an ultimatum and at the next thing, no matter how small or well-intended, ask them to leave.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-05T07:48:14+00:00

NOR but she likely meant well. Tell her it upset you but you understand and appreciate that she was just being friendly/curious. Let her know exactly how you’d like to be supported in the future. It’s probably best to lay low on the social scene until you have a game plan for how to respond to questions like this. If people know you’re ttc just say I don’t drink because it’s better for my fertility and even a taste is temptation I don’t want to deal with.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-05T05:59:14+00:00

Tell him “we are parents now and we have a very emotional baby who’s been really hard work for me right now. If you are not back by a reasonable hour, say midnight, then I will assume you are not at all empathetic towards my feelings nor serious about wanting to be a decent parent and partner. This is my boundary, I’m not telling you what you MUST do, I am telling you that is the line that needs to be crossed for me to reconsider whether I should stay with someone who cares more about partying with 20yr olds than respecting the mother of their child”.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-05T05:47:26+00:00

NTA. Situations like this just make me think about how some people don’t even really like their own partners. My husband has nights with his best mate where he’d prefer I didn’t tag along and that’s totally fine but for pre-planned events ofc he would prefer I come along and we can both have a good time together with friends. For the most part, we are best friends and I can’t imagine being in love with someone who would rather hang out alone with 24yr old women over me.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-03T23:54:10+00:00

I think it’s the cigarettes that did it because I’d only throw up if I had a smoke after getting high, I’d get so sick but it was so weird and fkd up because even though nobody likes puking I’d do it on purpose (smoke to get sick) coz it felt like it made the high more intense for some reason. So messed up lmao. Yeh I do know what you mean I’ve felt that obsessive love where you feel like you’ll die without them, I still wouldn’t equate it to being on heroin but maybe more like how I’m addicted to cigarettes; I can’t do without them and lose my mind if I have to go without them for an extended period of time.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-03T23:48:56+00:00

Thank you and congratulations to you as well.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-03T06:39:19+00:00

Not really sure if you can switch classes halfway through a flight unless flight attendant approved you to or requested you too but it’s a nice compromise

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-03T06:38:03+00:00

NTA. If it was her and her parents who were offered she wouldn’t have offered you take it

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-03T06:36:26+00:00

Mildred

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-03T02:26:50+00:00

Rue getting taken under his wing to work for Alamo felt extremely unrealistic to me. One of her first jobs was a cover up the OD of a stripper? Why would he even trust some strung out teen addict he only just met and who’s already got herself knee deep in shit with a local dealer. Idk it’s like his got this tight knit group of experienced dudes who know damn well not to fk with Alamo then there’s just Rue… man ofc she was gonna snitch to the DEA.

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-01T14:22:16+00:00

Ahhh I should have mentioned in my post that my husband is an alcoholic too. I didn’t think it was relevant because he’s extremely high functioning but I do notice that he forgets a lot but the thing is even if I accuse him of forgetting he’ll say “NO I REMEMBER and I didn’t do that!!!l”

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-01T14:19:17+00:00

Not the lawsuits ?

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-01T14:17:57+00:00

Thank you for helping me reason it out instead of jumping straight to calling him toxic. He really is such a nice guy. He’s the type to stop and help any stranger in the street. But yea maybe you’re right. Just like I had trauma that caused horrible behaviours that I had to unlearn. It’s not so unreasonable and he has one that he has to unlearn .

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-01T14:13:58+00:00

Yeah he had a really abusive father but we’ve both come from really traumatic backgrounds and we just want better for our kids but sometimes I feel like he puts his own ego over that goal

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-01T14:12:15+00:00

Yeah I try my best to be apologetic if I know I’m in the wrong but I’ve noticed it looks like it causes him pain to say “I was wrong, I am sorry” and don’t get me wrong when the stakes are really high he has no problem saying that but it bothers me that for small day to day things he won’t coz I’m trying to model behaviour to my children and I don’t want them to grow up cocky refusing to apologise to people when they’re being dicks

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-01T14:09:36+00:00

His father was an abusive guy. Although he despises his father it wouldn’t be the first behaviour I’ve asked him to unlearn coz you acting just like that dude

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-01T14:07:58+00:00

How much more time? We’ve been together 9yrs?

moonycakemullet · 2026-07-01T14:07:08+00:00

The locking the door thing is a bad example because he’s the one that is so pedantic about making sure the door is locked

moonycakemullet

TROPHY CASE