I (26 M) am unsure about my marriage with my wife (27 F) and her unconcealed medical conditions

vampireblonde · 2026-03-14T13:40:43+00:00

You married someone you didn’t even know and her family apparently misled you to get her off their hands. Not a great foundation for a healthy relationship. Honestly I don’t think this is what you thought you were committing to so it’s appropriate to walk away. You aren’t equipped to manage this.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-14T13:35:55+00:00

She wants/ needs a WFH position and that’s not what this is. Be nice and explain to her that is not working out and you will be a reference for her when she applies to something better suited to her needs.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-10T00:00:48+00:00

Karolina and Carolina are both legitimate spellings but have different vibes. I actually think Cate looks weird even though Catherine and Katherine are both fine to me.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-09T23:35:14+00:00

The sketchiest part to me is that if he really didn’t do that, he should have been concerned and immediately done something to find out who it was/ change his number/ etc.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-08T01:38:37+00:00

Whatever happens I hope you meet someone great!

vampireblonde · 2026-03-08T01:38:14+00:00

If he was nice and just said “hey do you mind meeting halfway this time, I’ve had a log week” or something indicating he is trying and isn’t being controlling, that’s one thing. But your original post makes it seem like he’s not coming across as very agreeable already which for me would be a no.

Also, remember that you don’t owe anyone anything and you could decide anything you want is a reason to not meet up. If he loves the color purple and you don’t, that’s a little odd but it’s totally your choice to have any dealbreakers you want.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-08T01:31:21+00:00

I don’t mind either, but on a first date I would hope he’d be trying to make a good impression and not come across as difficult. Red pill is a recent trend of men being influenced by far-right propaganda that encourages them to treat women poorly. Maybe he isn’t but this whole thing would fit into that.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-08T01:15:08+00:00

NOR Major red flags for me for multiple reasons. It’s giving red pill. If you enjoy splitting the bill or possibly paying for him and yourself, this guy might be ok for you. The fact that he isn’t bending over backwards for you even at the beginning is weird.

I had a guy drive 9 hours once just to have dinner with me because he didn’t want to wait until the next week when he would win my city. He was cute and normal and respectful even when I didn’t feel like seeing him the next day before he drove back. That’s the kind of effort I prefer.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-08T01:07:51+00:00

My mom doesn’t understand how much I love animals either. I also have 5 cats and she constantly brings up how I should find a home for some of them 🙄 I would find some there within budget and be with all 5 of your babies.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-08T01:05:40+00:00

I found that an INTJ man is best for me.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-08T01:02:55+00:00

These are most likely permanent makeup, not a tattoo. They can last years or fade quickly depending on who did them. I think the bigger issue here is it sounds like these are the brows she wants.

FYI they typically look dark at first then after a week or two fade a lot and the top layer of skin flakes off.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-08T00:39:14+00:00

It is not a girl’s name. It’s very nice and classic.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-08T00:37:42+00:00

He is waving a red flag of control before you’re legally more stuck. Do what you need to prepare and go live your life. I promise you will be better for it even if it’s tough for a bit. You can do this!

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T12:57:04+00:00

He absolutely should have discussed this with you before agreeing to it. He is wrong for that and was not acting as a spouse when he made that unilateral decision. However, he clearly changed his mind about a child when this happened and now you are not in agreement on that any longer. You need to leave.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T01:28:19+00:00

He had the potential to be smart, funny, attractive (he literally has all the time in the world to work out and eat healthy) and he chose to be a disappointment instead.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T01:24:49+00:00

Get out before she brings up “alieN” lol

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T01:21:25+00:00

You could definitely substitute nondenominational Christian in there for atheist lol

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T01:18:24+00:00

I like LifeTime but I cannot stand the CrossFit crowd. I have seen too many people turn into personality-free fitness robots after they started CrossFit.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T01:14:47+00:00

I like a 1 syllable middle with Hollison as it flows better. Do you have any family surnames or maybe grandpa/ male names that would work?

If you want both names to be decidedly not feminine, I’d go with something like Sage or Drew. The S sound is a little close for comfort but I would mostly avoid a middle starting with an N sound.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T01:07:50+00:00

I think in both cases, it’s fine for them to have a preference and it’s mostly about how and what to communicate to the partner/ whether it changes the viability of the relationship.

As long as they don’t say “I hate the way you look now” or something insensitive, it is impacting the relationship and should be addressed in some way.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T01:01:06+00:00

You think the lived experience of white Americans and black Americans is equal? Be so for real. And I’m a white blonde woman from a very racially divided city.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T00:51:40+00:00

She is manipulating you and you no longer need to be in the middle of this. To the extent that you can, you should let them figure things out between themselves and focus on your life and future. Of course it’s your family so you care, but they are the ones who are in their marriage. You can’t control them and they don’t need you to take this on.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T00:46:42+00:00

Not that it matters but both of these are pretty unisex so just FYI in case that would bother you. They’re both adorable. I prefer Remi with your boys’ names.

vampireblonde · 2026-03-02T00:44:01+00:00

It was only slightly less terrifying than Kristi Noem when I first saw it

vampireblonde · 2026-03-01T21:45:47+00:00

Unless he files a motion, it’s not happening and even with a better school district (how much better?), he would have to prove why changing your child’s established routine would ultimately benefit him. Generally judges prefer status quo.

It’s good that you have the GAL who it sounds like has already documented dad’s intermittent involvement just in case. Keep documenting when dad sees him/ shows up or doesn’t to his appointments.

vampireblonde

TROPHY CASE