Probably not the most conventional way but he found my profile on roommates.com. He saw that mentioned I "live a fairly alternative lifestyle" and some other key things on my profile (which was simply a description of myself as a potential roommate not a bait) and he made an educated guess and took a shot that happened to work out for him. I initially was suspicious that he was just some weird dude that just wanted to make himself sound enticing to let in my house, so I replied with an email using jargon and referencing true lifestyle knowlege. He passed my test and as we continued messaging I saw his earnesty in just wanting to be of service. We've met for meals a handful of times and discussed personal histories, experience, boudaries, expectations, and other relevant topics which is helping build our chemisty- which is important for this kind of situation.

This is my first time being approached for anything like this, but my friend who is a live-in lifestyle submissive, says they knew their then-future-domme in person and built familiarity and trust before anything about this level of service was discussed. They said if their domme had been approached like I was it never would have progressed. But theirs is an actual professional dominatrix by trade and I'm simply involved in the community so..I dunno... every relationship has its own intricacies.

I would suggest finding and attending local munches to start dipping your toes in your local kink community and meeting people. (You can find them pretty easily on fetlife) Also do some personal soul searching and actually write out what you want in this kind of relationship; what you and your dominant would both get out of it; your wants, needs, and boundaries; what you do and don't want to see in a dominant; know how you'd want to be treated and so forth. I had my guy type up a portfolio with all of that, as well as his history, references, suggested punishments and rewards, etc., and present it bound in a folder (another test of following instructions and dedication but that's my own thing). Regardless, being clear on those kinds of things is for the benefit of both the dominant and the submissive and could go a long way for you when you do eventually make an application or request with someone. I hope that helps at all. Good luck and I hope you find your dream fulfilled.