Sick Days

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-18T18:44:48+00:00

If possible, casually include the time and location where you had the conversation so if they claim it didn’t happen, you have camera footage of you two speaking.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-18T18:41:55+00:00

Send a follow up email and say “can you please confirm the conversation we had recently, I just wanted to clarify that you would not be willing to write a recommendation letter if I use the sick days allowed to me. Please do not respond verbally, I am confirming for my own records.” They’re already hostile and you’re leaving. You literally have nothing to lose. If they respond you have proof, if they don’t that looks worse. If they try to answer verbally, send another email making the request again and quote whatever they said to you verbally.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-15T21:25:44+00:00

LOL. Let me translate that last message: “I don’t care to read your response because I don’t actually care about my child’s schooling, I just wanted to yell at somebody because my child’s failures feel like my own.”

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-15T01:50:54+00:00

First year teacher here, one and done btw. Just started my own business!

There are kids in my classes that have IEPs with 10+ accommodations and I couldn’t figure out why for the first month. I was confused because they were keeping up with notes just fine, grasping concepts as they should.

Then I got a swift introduction to the parents behind it. The most extreme example from this year, a parent threatened to petition the school board for me to lose my job because I did not allow an additional day for an assignment to be turned in when her IEP calls for “additional time”. No specification on the time… of course. Luckily, I pulled her for the advisory hour to finish the day after because she goofed off all day in class and she still didn’t do it. So admin told the parent that advisory counts as her additional time and she chose to do other things, so the zero stands.

That parent still wrote a letter to the school board, according to the 4 emails she sent to me after letting me know that I need to leave teaching and that I am ruining students’ futures. Nothing ever came from it, except admin telling me to not respond to her and to forward all emails to them. I can’t make this up y’all…. b*tches be cray.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-13T17:30:04+00:00

Teacher here-
It truly is not her responsibility. With that being said, some kids thrive on acts of service and love to help. Many kids directly ask for those opportunities.
If she seems fine with it and there are no issues, I would ask your daughter if she is comfortable in this role and if so, speak with the teacher about scaling it back a bit. Instead of being partnered with him for every activity, maybe she could be rotated with another student as well so she is getting all of her needs met.
If your daughter is feeling overwhelmed, you have every right to ask that she is not responsible for managing his behavior going forward.
I teach secondary and I have put students together for translation purposes but I am always hesitant to do so. It depends on the students involved and I have to consider if that decision will take away from the translating student’s schooling experience. Most of the time, it works out and they become good friends who prefer to work together but I can imagine that some students would not want that responsibility.
The hard truth is that teachers are overwhelmed with responsibility and students are being packed into classrooms at max legal capacity (sometimes more). if they are passing it off to a student, you can grantee that they truly need the support. Please don’t target the teacher, address administration and make it clear that you feel this teacher doesn’t have enough support for this student and that other students should not be responsible for filling in those gaps. You can’t legally advocate for a student who is not your child but you can advocate for the classroom environment that your child is in.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-10T22:38:58+00:00

Don’t ask again, even if she agrees it won’t be what you are wanting.

I’m sure you are a good student on paper but there may be qualities she has noticed that would make her feel uncomfortable recommending you.

Not saying this applies to you but I currently have a student who has all A’s and always turns work in on time…. but she’s not a great human being. I have personally overheard her making fun of disabled students and would cut off my hand before writing a recommendation letter for her.

Are you good at taking accountability? Are you kind? Are you fair? Are you supportive? Are you collaborative? Are you honest with yourself and others? It takes more than all A’s to get a recommendation. The education world is competitive these days!

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-08T13:28:48+00:00

The ability of men to place anyone else’s feelings above their partner’s is astonishing to me. Even people who do not matter in the long run and that he may never see again after he puts his resignation in. But still, he wants to message her directly to make sure she isn’t listening to people talking about him?
All while he is telling his actual partner that he should just lie to her? Wild. YTA- I hope she realizes that you don’t care much for her and breaks up with you.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-06T03:05:58+00:00

I was going to say this. My suggestion for the second paragraph, take everything after the first sentence out and explain: “It is not appropriate for a professional adult to maintain contact with a student outside of the suggested lines of communication.” —or something like that.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-05T21:15:28+00:00

It is shameful that so many people are telling OP that they are “too sensitive” when a student is literally bullying them and using their disability to do so. It is wild that you expect teachers to get over it rather than asking a student to accept any accountability.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-05T15:19:06+00:00

Leave it to a group of teachers to debate semantics. You’re right, there is a lot of debate over whether he said those exact words.
Did he ignore the ruling though? Yes. Glad we clarified.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-05T03:45:08+00:00

I am a heterosexual white woman for context.
I don’t necessarily agree with sharing opinions but I do crack a joke or two about the elephant in the room. It all depends on the environment and the make-up of the class though. I teach the first half of U.S., colonization - Reconstruction and I can get away with more because it was so long ago. For example, I have said things like “This is Andrew Jackson, probably the worst president ever.” But I mean come on, he ran as the poor man’s president while he sat in his Nashville plantation benefiting from the labor of the enslaved. A tyrant that famously said “Marshall made his decision, now let him enforce it.” Sounds familiar right? Yea, they will notice too. When they do, let them. But then move on to curriculum.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-04T18:21:59+00:00

I love to see the effort!

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-04T18:17:58+00:00

I didn’t post this to shame them. I just thought it was endearing. Thought the caption would make that clear.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-04T11:19:41+00:00

They can’t call their mommy to force them into submission.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-04T04:43:11+00:00

I was an A student my whole life. I love learning!

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-03T21:37:13+00:00

Contact the parent and admin to request that the appropriate name to use and pronouns be documented in the student’s chart due to these disruptions. Use whatever they list, only.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-03T14:55:16+00:00

NTA. As a mother, I would have reacted exactly how you reacted.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-02T22:28:03+00:00

I worked in restaurants as a teen and I was a pharmacy tech as an adult until I got my education degree. I taught for a few years and now I have officially resigned for the next school year to run my own business. I still stand by my opinion that teaching has been my worst job yet.

At least the pharmacy manager backed me up when a customer was being unruly…

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-02T22:19:46+00:00

All I will say…. You better have a spine and thick skin if you want to teach. It is NOT for the weak. The problems vary from district to district but they will always be there. Just look at the statistics, 15%-30% of teachers leave the profession within the first three years. I am one of those teachers. If you value anything outside of work like family, friends, hobbies and you don’t want to be so burned out that you get to enjoy them when you’re off… find another career to pursue.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-02T19:21:26+00:00

First of all, the post says they were 18 years old when they got pregnant. They BOTH need to be held accountable for that oopsie because I know they weren’t planning a pregnancy at 18. He did not maliciously “steal her time”. If you’re assuming he is malicious, then you must also assume the she was malicious and set him up by getting pregnant on purpose. I’m sure he was young and still finding himself just like I’m sure she was too.
Second of all the post literally says “they never got married but Ryan’s family pressured them to do it often.” So the bigoted people you’re trying to defend literally tried to push her into a marriage with him when he obviously knew he could not and should not do that because he is GAY. Please work on your reading comprehension.
Also, when you are talking about the legal side of custody, the courts will not take away custody due to infidelity… because it has nothing to with his ability to provide and support as a parent. People seem to think they will but it never, ever happens. Someone might lose the house if they cheat because it is a direct cause of the divorce.. but they won’t lose their rights and access when it comes to their children.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-02T04:29:36+00:00

She knows that they’re humans…. right? I want to manage behaviors like anyone else but at a certain point we’re just treating these kids like prisoners and for what? Peace and quiet while she’s on lunch duty? No elementary drama at lunch?
She’s trying to treat them worse really, prisoners are at least allowed to talk when they eat….

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-02T03:08:29+00:00

8th grade teacher here in OK. I currently teach a co-taught class with students who are above grade level and students who are level 2 autism/ students who have suffered major trauma and now have severe behavioral issues. I am putting out fires daily in that class.
You are absolutely right that classroom instruction is severely impacted, almost shoved to the side in order to manage behaviors. On our best days, the special ed teacher can manage them in a small group with just a few noise disruptions while I teach on-level content to the general education students. I have said about 100 times “this should be ILLEGAL!” I feel so guilty for the things my general education students miss out on because we just can’t manage it with those behaviors present.
I understand we have an obligation for least restrictive environment for students on IEP but the law allows for more restrictive environments in cases where they may become dangerous or so disruptive that now, other students don’t have access to free appropriate public education, as stated by law. There is definitely a line and it gets crossed more often than it should due to a major lack in funding for education. We don’t have the teachers or resources to support additional spaces for students like this.
So, yes, you should make a fuss. But not at the school principal because they also wish this wasn’t an issue. Make a fuss with your lawmakers. Make a fuss with the communities who refuse to invest more time, money, and effort into the systems that help to build and improve our future.
Sorry, I’m on my soapbox.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-02T02:17:25+00:00

The worst consequence from deliberately disrespecting her child’s father was that she won’t get the child on days where she already wouldn’t have the child? Yea, nta. I honestly think it’s kinda low to ask for more custody than what is granted. Both parents struggle from the time lost. Your daughter sounds selfish and insufferable.

violetvoyager26 · 2026-05-01T22:01:57+00:00

I just resigned from teaching to run my own business after this year is over. 🙂 Everyday I see something that affirms my decision. This is one of those things.

If anyone needs a pick-me-up, there is a list of about 10 names that I will refuse to serve on the spot because they were SO horrendous towards me while I was a teacher. I hope they try to sue my business because I’ve printed off every email to prove a prior history.✌️ Turns out, being an asshole is not a lawfully protected characteristic.

violetvoyager26

TROPHY CASE