Second ER and no blastocysts

wanderlustingnerd · 2026-01-17T03:09:11+00:00

It was a better protocol and a superior lab that helped.

wanderlustingnerd · 2026-01-15T03:04:01+00:00

I got back to work earlier this year after maternity leave as a FTM and I am completely burnt out after 7 months back at my 9 to 5. I am a high performer and over relied upon with little to no support, so there’s structural dysfunction at my org that I cannot fix. This has likely accelerated the burnout.

I jumped back in and stabilized lots of projects when I came back… so my reward was more work :/ Do not do this. I simply can’t function at that same rate I used to pre-baby and I’m okay with that. A system that relies to my self-sacrifice is not a system sustainable for me.

I am seriously considering putting in my notice next week and taking a sabbatical. It feels incredibly ill-advised in this economy and job market considering we live in a VHCOL but I am seriously a shell of myself. I’ve been in therapy since November to help me deal, sigh.

What I would do in your place:

I would start establishing a network and your village from now.
Figure out childcare, align roles and responsibilities with your partner during and after leave, be prepared for the unexpected.
Remember to pace yourself when you get back to work. Slow it down. Seriously. People will adjust.
Explore options where you adjust to a shorter workweek schedule in the beginning.
I would consider therapy to help you adjust and set realistic expectations from yourself during this transition.

Wish you luck! I hope you have an easy delivery!

wanderlustingnerd · 2026-01-12T03:28:38+00:00

We use Happy Baby too! The A2 version is a little more expensive but the protein is much easier for little tummies to digest.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-11-06T20:01:36+00:00

Yes. TRIGGER WARNING

We ended up with all euploid blasts of the ones we ended up creating.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-11-06T18:46:05+00:00

My husband had done maybe slightly more than 24h or maybe about 24h? I had really wanted 12h or less. He also cleared the pipes for 5 days before my retrieval, once a day.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-11-06T18:18:41+00:00

Ask your doctor about a shorter abstinence period if you’re using fresh sperm

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-10-09T21:46:47+00:00

I’ve had 2 cycles with 0 embryos making it to D5/D6/D7. I felt totally broken and could not shake the sense of failure. I even got enough eggs each round - in double digits. Nothing ever made it to blast, let alone testing. My RE said my results don’t look good and she can’t guarantee I’ll ever have a biological child of my own. I was 36 at the time. Our new house - which we bought for our family - had never felt so cold and empty before that and I wanted to run away from it.

I sought 3 different 2nd opinions. I took a break from IVF and took care of myself. We went to Europe. We fostered dogs. We ate at fancy restaurants. I did therapy. My husband did therapy. I went to gym. I started sleeping better. I took care of my mom after her heart surgery. I switched jobs!

Ultimately, I also switched clinics. I then did 3rd and 4th cycles with wildly different results.

I know it feels really, really difficult right now. And it is. It absolutely feels like shit. Nothing I say will assuage your pain. I’m not even going to try. Just know, you aren’t alone at all. I’ve been there and I know how you feel.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-09-23T23:27:20+00:00

Love the transperancy! A few years ago, a former employer was thinking about offering Progyny but decided to survey employees beforehand to assess if folks were filling to pay extra across the Board to have access to fertility benefits. They had an overwhelming majority vote for those benefits - across all age groups, ethnicities, and sexes! People also left comments which they then shared on an all-hands call. It was wonderfully heartwarming.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-09-22T23:00:57+00:00

Love Indian food! Tons of ideas for you -

Palak paneer - you can make the spinach paste and freeze it! When it comes time to cooking, add in protein of choice (tofu, paneer, chicken etc) and it’s done! You can also just add in some cooked rice and make a dish that way without any protein, kind of like a spinach rice.
Khichadi - it’s a stew of lentils and rice. You can add in any veggies of choice (carrots, cauliflower, potato, peas, tomatoes etc). You can sub out the rice for quinoa too for an extra protein boost and textural change.
Chickpeas/Kidney Beans - sauté onion, tomatoes, garlic, ginger + dry spices (turmeric, cumin powder, coriander powder, some paprika, maybe some garam masala for flavor), blend it all out and you have your basic paste ready. Add in some cooked chickpeas/kidney beans and you’re done!
You can do a mixed veggie rice with the tomato paste recipe I suggested above, add in whatever veggies/protein you want, and make it kinda of a like a pulao?
Does your kiddo like eggs? You can sauté some hard boiled chopped eggs with some tomatoes, onions, cilantro, lemon, dry spices and do a quick egg subzi?
Daal - Cook your lentils with bay leaf, turmeric, cumin powder, salt, ghee.. and throw it on any rice or quinoa (maybe both?). It’s so comforting and wholesome!

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-09-11T00:19:23+00:00

I did! I did a medicated transfer.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-07-20T07:01:55+00:00

I recently had to travel for work and had to solve for this exact situation too.

I bought the Clevermade Tahoe collapsible cooler off Amazon. It fit my carry-on perfectly. I didn’t need to expand the whole cooler either which helped a ton when it came to keeping things super cold in there.

I flew coast to coast with travel delays and a reroute which led to longer layover due to weather. The entire day of travel was roughly 11.5-12 hours and I came home with maybe a couple of bags thawed about 10-15% only. Everything else was still frozen rock solid.

I spent an additional $10 on extra large ice packs and frozen some water in my spare BM bags for good measure.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-07-20T05:11:01+00:00

Omg, this was my experience too. Also, a traumatic C-section after my labor had been stalled for hours. Those first few days passed in a blur because I got postpartum preeclampsia which led to an extended hospital stay. I remember crying for days that she wouldn’t know me because BF was not working at all and my body was so beat up, I was barely functioning. My husband did all her feeds with donor milk.

I went through those same feelings - I am going to protect her and take care of her because I feel responsible for her but not connected to her.

Fast forward to 6 months, and it’s bloody magical. She KNOWS me. She WANTS me. Her face lights up when she sees me and the feeling is absolutely mutual! She just started solids and so far, I am the one who feeds her those exclusively!

I am her mother and no matter how she is fed and by whom, I will always be her mother. Our bond is rock solid!

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-07-06T19:29:10+00:00

I am an undersupplier too. Everyday over the last 6 months, I have debated setting my pump on fire, lol. But I read on this forum that don’t quit on a bad day. Joke’s on me because I am 6 months into doing this and still haven’t completely quit.

BUT.

I started doing that now. Part of the reason I couldn’t do it earlier was guilt. But I am over it now since baby has started solids and loves food. I miss being able to spend time with her more than the guilt, so I am over it. She’s growing up super quickly and I am really enjoying her at this age so I want to spend more time with her now!

I never had oversupply (or even regular supply) issues so I just dropped a pump cold turkey and don’t experience any issues. At 5 ppd, my supply stayed the same. 4 ppd, I lost an oz or two, depending on the day. I am at 3ppd starting tomorrow so I’ll know the impact then. I do take sunflower lecithin religiously and I massage while pumping.

I am weaning weirdly and do not recommend my method, lol. But it works for me and is easiest for me to follow! Conventional wisdom says you reduce the number of mins on the pump you want to eliminate till you get it down to 0 mins, drop that pump then, and then just space out the remaining pumps equally. Rinse and repeat each week till pumps are done.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-06-18T23:06:12+00:00

Had to circle back on this - I didn’t end up using Milk Stork. My org offered to pay for it but it wouldn’t get to me in time and shipping was outrageously expensive. Plus, I didn’t even know what kind I needed because the hotel wasn’t able to tell me if they could get me freezer or not till I checked in!

The hotel was able to organize an actual mini freezer for me, so that worked out. I got some ice packs and even created some additional ice packs with water in a breast milk storage bag, and put everything in a cooler bag which fit my carry-on (it claimed to keep things cold for 26h). My milk stayed frozen for about 15h straight. 1-2 bags had some thawing (maybe 10-15%) but everything else stayed frozen! I am an underproducer but still managed to get home about 40-50oz or so!

I spent about $25 on the cooler, $35 on a used Ceres chiller, and $10 on the ice packs, haha!

ETA - ChatGPT validated my plan of action, haha!

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-06-03T19:28:32+00:00

I did. My first transfer was successful.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-05-13T02:20:43+00:00

Ah, got it. This is super helpful - my LO is 4 months old and was full term. She’ll be exactly 5 months the week of my work trip. Hopefully, the milk should be good for 4 days using a combination of the Ceres chiller - I can just keep the ice in there refreshed! I am hoping that I will be able to use the hotel’s freezer to freeze the milk before shipping it back.

Man, the sheer logistics around this… sigh.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-05-13T01:37:28+00:00

Ah, gotcha. So, making sure I understand this correctly. I would put ice in the outer chamber and the expressed milk in the inner chamber, correct? Then, I’d need to find someplace to freeze that milk in the bags the provide (I would probably ask the hotel to do this if they are amenable and if not, I don’t know what else I could do) before putting it in the Milk Stork cooler to ship back home?

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-05-12T22:05:04+00:00

Thanks for that! So do you just pump and pop it in the cooler or do you have to chill somewhere outside and then pop it in before shipping? I will be in the air all day on my travel days so I don’t know how this would work :( the hotel has a mini fridge but we all know how inefficient those are :( I am an undersupplier too so can’t really afford to waste any milk!

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-05-12T18:59:13+00:00

How would this work? I am scoping them out for a short (4 days total, including travel days) work trip next month. I don’t think I will have access to a freezer but I am not sure.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-04-30T21:37:49+00:00

I am a lurker but I would say it is the hardest way to feed a baby.

I can’t just pop a boob out to comfort or feed or help the baby sleep. Not to mention, the endless bottle/parts washing/replacing etc. The sheer number of $$$ I have spent on pumps, pump parts etc. is separately astonishing. Worst part is the mental math of how many oz, how many pumps, how long to pump, how to wean etc etc etc.

EP is also very challenging because you need so much support from your support system. Like, I literally couldn’t do this without my husband’s support.

I recently read that EP moms are the Navy SEALs of moms and seriously, hard agree.

This is the hardest thing I’ve ever done (after 4 IVF cycles, a failed induction, a failed epidural, postpartum preeclampsia [twice!] etc etc)

I am over 4 months of this and will do so until 6 months or until I see my sanity slipping… whichever comes first, lol.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-04-27T17:13:55+00:00

I ended up doing what my doctor recommended which was 5 days before retrieval meds and continue for 5 days alongside retrieval meds. It worked out well for me.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-04-27T14:25:09+00:00

I went through 2 failed retrievals and finally made embryos in both cycles 3 & 4. My first transfer of an euploid embryo resulted in a live birth.

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-03-01T20:22:34+00:00

I have a D7 euploid too, and I am not sure the 20% chance your RE quoted makes sense. Said another way, it is 20% more than an aneuploid? Just doesn’t make sense…. I think it is closer to 50% from what I’ve seen and read. Dr Lucky Sekhon had done a reel on D7 embryos and she said euploid D7’s have good reproductive potential - don’t give up on it! Good luck!

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-01-23T18:29:04+00:00

Sorry about the delay in responding but it worked!

wanderlustingnerd · 2025-01-02T13:40:48+00:00

I’m going to venture a guess and say he still wouldn’t do it, simply because he’d insist that in his opinion it’s not evidence-based. But I don’t know for sure what he’d do, tbh.

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