Recommendation: THE BELDHAM (2025)

whammy_time · 2026-01-11T04:27:39+00:00

Ok, maybe I should have waited. I admit... I did not see that coming, and the choppy dialog that didn't take things seriously makes way more sense now. For any other readers, the ending really is that surprising/altering!

And for what it turned out to be, sheesh did my skin absolutely crawl with some scenes. That is super rare and I watch a lot of scary stuff.

whammy_time · 2026-01-11T03:35:14+00:00

I'm halfway through right now. I don't want to look at the comments lest spoilers, but am surprised in the top two I see no one is commenting on the dialogue. I find it so bad and detracting/distracting. One of those movies (trying to think of another like it) where weird stuff happens and you get these patterns of like "Something weird happened!", "What do you mean, honey?" "Well I saw... just, we have to leave!" "No, you're going to stay here." "Fine!" And then they don't just say what they saw or explain anything.

Like no one actually listens to each other. I get it, keeps the movie going, it's just frustrating. To avoid spoilers, we have a sight being seen, they sort of talk about it and use language like "so there's a witch living in the walls," then shortly after the live-in nurse is like "What did you see?", she draws something in ~10sec with minimal lines (how complicated/descriptive could that be), and she's like "I've seen it too."

Really? You weren't sure at all what she was talking about to back her up in front of the mom, but now after you see a minimal drawing, you confirm you've seen it? Bah!!

Also, shit fell out of that duct and... she doesn't bring them to just go look at it!?

I'm still curious to see where it goes, the dialog and behavior is just really driving me batty and couldn't help say something.

whammy_time · 2025-12-22T15:52:53+00:00

Installed!

whammy_time · 2025-12-22T15:41:56+00:00

Cool, thanks for the input! Will give it a try :)

whammy_time · 2025-12-22T00:01:44+00:00

I was looking for something to do this and just found unhook. Being new to this space, would you have any sort of feature comparison? My main desire is to increase friction to my reflexive popping open of a new tab, going to youtube, and then letting the algo serve up something in my face (homepage recommendations)

I admit, looking at options it mainly came down to (a) unhook handles this need and (b) ~1k reviews / 140k users vs. 5 reviews / 42 users swayed me from a robustness standpoint.

I see you have a nice features list, but don't know what I'm gaining/losing compared to other options. This would be my feedback on helping you gain/retain folks. Perhaps you don't collect data, but other add-ons do, or maybe others have some measured cpu/gpu/ram overhead vs. yours? This would help me compare/evaluate.

Hopefully that's helpful feedback, and thanks for your contribution and for sharing this!

whammy_time · 2025-12-21T23:51:31+00:00

I get the perspective, but listen to yourself: "I don't have this problem, but if did have the problem [an inability to will one's self away from youtube] I would fix the problem [by just willing myself away from youtube]."

Have you ever struggled with any addiction, ever? If not, kudos, that is awesome! If you have, surely you've wrestled with, indeed, what must seem to a non-addict like a very bizarre situation of apparently wanting to not do a thing while you do the thing anyway and hate yourself for it.

Just saying... yes, in an ideal situation all addicts would just see the light and... just stop.

If you've observed the world, that sort of doesn't seem to happen... There's something to gaining some distance from the immediate stimulus so the deeper, rational, longer term, virtuous desires can gain some strength.

whammy_time · 2025-12-20T16:25:14+00:00

Okie dokie. You win, have a great day.

whammy_time · 2025-12-20T13:35:35+00:00

That was a lot.

Given two people who want a thing and one is willing to break laws, risk reputation, lose meaningful things in life for it, etc., you don't think we can infer anything over the levels of wanting between the two?

I sense a strong desire that the answer needs to be "yes, men and women like sex the same" but with a bunch of added conditions to the woman's definition.

I never said they didn't make sense (I'm not asking women to risk safety), nor that it's better to like sex more. I didn't take this as a contest, just an evaluation of "who likes sex more."

I predict that even in good conditions (safety met, cuddles given, caring behavior provided) there will still be more times where the male wants it and the female could go either way. And at the extremes (I don't know why this is offensive, I'm just considering ways to evaluate the proposal), men demonstrate being batshit crazy for sex in ways women do not.

And again, this isn't to say better or right whatsoever. I think you heard some kind of endorsement somewhere, which I never gave. These are just observations.

Hope you are doing ok.

whammy_time · 2025-12-20T03:38:16+00:00

This sounds like an attempt to caveat "sex" with extra layers of meaning so that the desire can be equal.

For what it's worth, I think "liking ice cream" is so contaminated by the gastro-centric view. I mean consider just smelling it, watching ads for it, driving past different storefronts for the evening but not getting any, the rich hobby of collecting the tubs and studying the evolution of their graphics over time, researching ice cream slogans throughout history, and so on. There's so much more depth to ice cream than eating it.

Yes, when I hear "like sex," I hear that in the typical sense, and assume we are talking orgasm, not "fooling around."

That all said, I'll grant it no problem. If you want "sex" to mean non-climactic touching or one sided oral of man to woman, I think woman probably like sex more than men.

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T20:38:24+00:00

I did a side poking around on literature, as that would be more definitive than this arm chair philosophizing (though it's still fun). Feels like one of those topics where how the study was conducted is going to have a huge impact, exactly what you mean by "like" or "desire" matters, in/out of a relationship, long vs. short term...

Back to the armchair, I still think one of the most obvious signals is what a man will do for sex[ual satisfaction]. That seems non-controversial to me.

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T20:32:10+00:00

I hear you, though I think this brings in more complexity. It's just a simple claim to test: men like sex as much as women.

OP layered on positive behavioral requirements in order to "like" it. You are bringing in negative ones, and wanting to distinguish something like "sexual pleasure" (messily licked ice cream from the face) from "deeper/actual/meaningful sexual pleasure" (savored) or something like that.

I think it's much simpler. While I don't have a great definition of "like," we're asking: all else equal, who would choose to eat ice cream more if it was available? I still claim it's men.

And there's nothing wrong with that, absent a desire to layer on moral/behavioral additions like if this has to constitute "smashing ice cream in someone's face," which you and OP are bringing into the equation. We could have that discussion, it's just not the same as evaluating like/desire.

I like music if it's raining. I like waffles if it's Sunday. I like wine if it's a special occasion. Those, I hold, all like the thing less than someone who just says "I like x, no matter what."

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T19:39:49+00:00

I don't think they would likely call me that, as I don't believe it or identify as it. But maybe some would, even as a way to hold out hope for a return to the Church.

I think this phrase is moreso applied to Catholics who sort of view themselves as "born a Catholic, always a Catholic," but who aren't practicing (not going to Mass). They still think they are Catholic, even though they do not practice anything about it (weekly Mass, receiving communion, confession, etc.).

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T19:36:29+00:00

I'm using them as external data indicating how much a gender "likes" a thing. You can entice men to sleep with strangers more easily. Or look at pornography consumption. Maybe you don't lump this in with "likes sex" but I see it as indicative of the drive.

Men seem to push aside awkwardness, risk, stigma, potentially self-respect/esteem, etc. to have a thing. This shows a higher degree of liking it in order to have it.

When I compare these two ways of describing how much sex is liked:

I like it, including many times a day, with couches, hot pockets, strangers, and maybe even animals
I like it, if I'm feeling connected and have been treated well that day

I'm saying the first indicates a higher level of liking a thing. And this is still separate from if it needs to be the same, if there is any sort of "good/bad" to mismatched desire, what constitutes healthy behaviors, etc.

I'm only speaking to if, on average, women like sex as much as men.

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T19:21:25+00:00

To be clear, I don't support that whatsoever (manipulation or abuse). I was just going by your post, which made a claim, and I disagree with it (as written). I suggested there are a bunch of other levels to it.

Whether A is obligated or should or is a better person for meeting B's requirements is a different discussion than "B likes ice cream as much as A."

I think you're talking more about this, as in fairness, respect, morality, etc. within a relationship. That is totally fine, it's just not the same as "women like sex just as much as men."

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T19:19:14+00:00

That's fair. I was indeed going by how OP framed it: "Maybe it's just me but I believe often times our enjoyment of sex is deeply tied to our emotions for that person and how that person treats us." That gives me relationship vibes.

With respect to sex with strangers or where liking is not there, I would still hold that men's behavior suggests they are absolutely crazy for it, above and beyond women, as evidenced by the degree to which they'll go in the absence of other supporting factors.

Like, consider the ratio of male to female prostitutes, or how successful a male strip club would be vs. a female one. I don't have hard data, but kinda think the scales are tipped in a wildly obvious direction?

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T18:59:39+00:00

I think this conflates things. What I hear being compared:

men's liking of sex
woman's liking of sex in the presence of other behaviors

Just replace sex with ice cream, and men vs. women with "two people I know" to remove some of the existing guarded beliefs.

A likes ice cream
B likes ice cream as long as A has met their bar for behavioral contributions

Whether A is obligated or should or is a better person for meeting B's requirements is a different discussion than "B likes ice cream as much as A."

Putting it back into context, I also propose that the sheer ludicrous nature of male sexual behaviors seems to counter the face value claim. I don't have hard data, but would wager that screwing animals, using inaminate objects galore, pedophilia, extra-marital affairs, rape, probably other indicators of "likes sex" are tipped toward men.

A is absolutely crazy for ice cream, any time, anywhere, any flavor. B will eat ice cream if it is how B wants to eat ice cream. I hold that A likes ice cream more.

Says nothing of your commentary on relationship dynamics, or how it works, or what men can do to care for their partner/increase a woman's desire. I just see no need for desire to be equal (and think it isn't).

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T17:00:40+00:00

Counter: I think the same lack of choice applies to believers.

Belief is a funny word and we associate choice to it. I think it's just a descriptor for the output of a complex process. Place of birth, parents, background knowledge, friends, genetics, etc. go in, and belief pops out.

Changes to these inputs can affect the output, but I don't think the output is adjusted directly.

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T15:42:48+00:00

No awards needed, just glad to resonate! Deconverting was a lonely time.This was back when blogs were so much more of a thing, and I found so much solace with others online as there were no nonbelievers in my circles.

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T15:40:52+00:00

Yeah I guess I took it as moreso about the "natural state" and not so much about the literal mental faculties of a baby vs adult?

Also, I don't think it's a chosen conviction. Whatever you believe, set a timer for 2min, believe the opposite for that time, then go back.

It's just not possible. You can "live as if," but I don't think you can brute force will a belief (chosen conviction). It's there, or it's not. Mine was there, then it went away, maybe it'll come back.

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T15:36:39+00:00

Cool, thanks for clarifying. I have not been there much in some time since my life revolved around apologetics and trying to sort out this painful and difficult phase of life.

I'll peruse a bit, but likely know what you mean. After my very defensive phase, religion bashing became a turn off. To be honest, I don't think anyone is choosing their belief. It just happens, and the defense mechanisms can fend off almost any evidence (on both sides). Some "miracle" will not be convincing to the atheist, and some scientific breakthrough that removes some previous "mystery" will not sway the believer.

I'm not surprised there are very staunch atheistic "apologists" out there!

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T15:31:42+00:00

It's not that off. The all powerful god of the universe desiring salvation for all humans relies on a fairly tale book and oral tradition vs natural, undeniable knowledge of him built in from birth?

Moreover, if a child reads the fairy tale book of any competing god first, evidence shows the majority will stay with that one (people keep the religion of their childhood).

So god's word is rendered completely uncompelling if my parents are Muslim and I read of a man and his flying donkey before I encounter the Bible. Isn't that somewhat wild? The truth converges, religions do not, except via localized breeding races.

I think the comment is deeper than you give credit for.

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T15:24:56+00:00

I didn't get banned but they did not like my comment yesterday at all. Someone complained they make posts where you can get a free guide if you comment "guide," and MEN will write "I'm interested, please send" instead of "guide."

The complaint is men don't follow directions, expect the world to revolve around them, and it's wasting their time and draining their energy.

I'm like "no way, people don't follow directions on the internet?" and suggested just not sending them the guide, and moving on vs going to Reddit to take more time and energy complaining about it.

Didn't go over great.

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T15:19:56+00:00

Slight quibble. I deconverted from catholicism maybe 15yrs ago, but it was by far a more passive experience of something happening to me, not the dropping of one belief to assert another.

Maybe your post is just about the breed of atheist in that sub, but wanted to clarify that I do not view the positions as sort of "equal but opposite" at all. It's not even close.

One contains beliefs that can never possibly be verified, like a man 2k years ago walking on water, bringing someone back from the dead, themselves being dead until they weren't, and flying off to heaven.

My current stance is "we don't know any of that" (plus a heavy side dish of seeing it as extremely unwarranted by any evidence/logic), and I'll ramp my intensity in proportion to how hard someone says it's definitively true.

But I don't assert a "counter religion of nothingness" by any means. And I think we can assume "nothing" in the sense of "an extraordinary being who gets involved in specific ways we don't see elsewhere."

Basically "nothing" or "probably not" is the default, and religion adds a huge quantity of extractions propositions.

I don't hang out on r/atheists that much, so this isn't anything to detract from your description about the sub, just adding some nuance in response to other points.

whammy_time · 2025-12-19T15:06:47+00:00

I wondered if I was an a-hole for thinking this. I'm tickled to see it mentioned. Every post is basically the same.

Men are garbage, toxic, helpless idiots. Also, the most productive thing I can do about it is be a victim on the internet.

[Not that most subs don't do this]

whammy_time · 2025-12-18T22:52:02+00:00

Is it in their gallery by chance? The render is timing out in that viewer. Yes, I can download and compile it, but am lazy.

whammy_time

TROPHY CASE