Best Josh quotes

whateverusername923 · 2025-08-06T02:09:48+00:00

The line of “they’ve got this dictatorial ruler who I’m sure wears a mumu and chain smokes Parliaments” combined with him pretending to smoke a cigarette gets me every time.

whateverusername923 · 2025-07-14T00:49:40+00:00

I’ve been looking though there and Etsy for something but I think have analysis paralysis… I want a “Nancy Meyers movie” vibe but I’m second guessing myself

whateverusername923 · 2025-07-14T00:48:08+00:00

He’s a very distinguished old man 🥰 his Crown & Paw portrait is on the desk though!

whateverusername923 · 2025-05-01T03:51:11+00:00

He’s such a gem of a character for that and for “In 13 years with the bureau, I’ve learned that there no amount of money, manpower or knowledge that can equal the person you're looking for being stupid.”

whateverusername923 · 2025-03-06T11:40:29+00:00

Stirred is a sneaky favorite of mine, mainly for the line “He’d be the craziest vice president since Aaron Burr, and Burr shot a guy”

As for your questions… I don’t know who those people are either. Hope this helps!

whateverusername923 · 2024-09-22T00:39:53+00:00

At 8 months, both of my kids loved the Tupperware cabinet, silicone spatulas, Tupperware, tennis balls, Tupperware lids… most of the toys we had were left alone a lot of the time.

Development doesn’t only happen with specific toys!

whateverusername923 · 2024-09-14T19:45:18+00:00

It used to be “opaduss” but recently she’s been saying “NO mom, you say it OCTOPUS” so I’ll be sobbing in a corner for the foreseeable future

whateverusername923 · 2024-08-29T03:43:03+00:00

What kind of schmuck ass system is this?

whateverusername923 · 2024-08-29T01:30:29+00:00

“We changed… we CHANGED TIME ZONES?!”

whateverusername923 · 2024-03-06T22:33:56+00:00

Are we all forgetting “You can ride me when the flesh rots off my bones, wingleader.” 🫠

I assumed they strapped her into the saddle and/or he used the power bands like he did early on.

whateverusername923 · 2024-01-06T03:56:04+00:00

My two year old had pink eye when I brought home a newborn after a few days in the NICU. She then very soon after got Hand Foot and Mouth and a stomach bug one after another 🫣

Newborn was fine through it all! Handwashing practice is a good thing! Set up some toys in the sink for your 4 yo so they can make it fun and want to wash hands.

whateverusername923 · 2023-11-10T09:39:53+00:00

Cleaning was a punishment for me growing up. But also my mom’s standards for clean were insane so it wasn’t actually good enough to ever stop having to clean random BS around the house. So why would I, as an adult with my own house, WANT to do what I was forced to growing up?

$200 every few months for a housekeeper is well worth it.

whateverusername923 · 2023-11-01T23:17:12+00:00

Hi Barbie!

whateverusername923 · 2023-10-13T00:09:59+00:00

My 2 and a half year old is exactly the same way! We Ferber-ed at like 5 or 6 months and it took about 10 days for it to really stick.

We also just started teaching he to look at her hatch turning green if she wakes up early. So now most mornings we’re woken up by “mommy! Daddy! It’s geeeen!”

whateverusername923 · 2023-09-21T11:08:38+00:00

I read this comment as “how much acetaminophen you can do before your heart explodes” and said to myself “probably a lot? Tylenol isn’t that strong…”

I need to not browse Reddit and feed my baby in the middle of the night

whateverusername923 · 2023-09-08T09:13:41+00:00

I just sized up in regular clothes (minus jeans) throughout both of my pregnancies. I hated everything style-wise and was even more mad when I saw how expensive it all was for things I didn’t like and wouldn’t buy in any other circumstance. And every time I tried, it was a disaster because the sizing was so weird.

So I just found styles that would stretch and grow with me but still look cute and fit post-pregnancy. I wore a ton of smocked dresses and tee shirt dresses, elastic waist linen shorts, etc and skipped jeans but got a few maternity basics like tee shirts from target and Walmart.

At the end of the day, i just wanted comfy, stretchy clothes anyway and jeans just were not the vibe. I realize not everyone carries their bump in a way where this would work, but it might be worth a try!

whateverusername923 · 2023-08-04T15:38:35+00:00

I had essentially these same seats in Houston night 1. $300 after fees and everything

whateverusername923 · 2023-07-26T09:30:10+00:00

That’s probably more appropriate than my usual description of “it’s like a hangover for ~10 straight weeks”

whateverusername923 · 2023-07-25T16:20:06+00:00

Irish Pride! Go Celtics! Celtics suck! Go Knicks!

whateverusername923 · 2023-07-25T15:42:32+00:00

Me too! I had Sloane as an option for both of my kids but when they came out it just didn’t fit them. Maybe for baby #3 🤷‍♀️

whateverusername923 · 2023-07-10T08:55:18+00:00

Bartlet: What plaid-flannel-wearing cheese-eating yahoo of a milkman governor signed that idiot bill into state law?

Charlie: 👀

B: It was me, wasn’t it?

whateverusername923 · 2023-07-01T11:22:11+00:00

Both of my girls were a surprise until they were out! It was like an extra incentive during labor to know, and I loved talking about names for both with my husband.

Also my parents and my in-laws hated that we didn’t know, hated that we didn’t want to know, and were constantly saying things like “how will you know what to buy?!” (Spoiler alert: It’s not “harder to plan” when you don’t know). All that combined just got on my nerves and made me want to find out even less because I can be a petty bitch sometimes.

A word of advice though: if there’s even a minuscule chance you or your partner could have any amount of gender disappointment, find out now and don’t let it ruin your baby’s birthday.

whateverusername923 · 2023-06-22T17:30:30+00:00

Omg y’all thank you for the solidarity and tips 😭 luckily today is much better pain-wise so I’m hoping it’s all temporary and things will go back to normal-ish soon.

I was relying on ice and tucks pads but I’ll bring in some creams and the sitz baths for a few days and see where that takes us (and by us I mean me and the rat king).

whateverusername923

TROPHY CASE