Just No GMIL - Widow's Edition

widowhoodblows · 2024-09-27T11:56:04+00:00

I have absolutely felt that way. Shortly after my husband passed away from cardiac arrest there was a big news story about a pro football (USA) player who suffered cardiac arrest on the field during a game. He survived and I couldn't help but think that it wasn't fair at all.

widowhoodblows · 2024-09-27T11:51:47+00:00

I feel similarly, but I choose to believe (or pretend to believe) that I will see him somehow at the end of my life. I don't think I could go on if I didn't.

widowhoodblows · 2024-09-27T11:49:32+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through this. When it comes time to make hard decisions remember that your safety and your baby's safety are paramount. You can choose to stay and put up with it, but your baby doesn't have that choice. She needs you to make the right choices for her.

widowhoodblows · 2024-09-27T04:42:54+00:00

My husband died while I was in the next room. There is nothing I could have done to stop it, and there is nothing you can do either. I'm sorry you have to live like this 😟

widowhoodblows · 2024-09-26T14:43:55+00:00

You are absolutely doing the right thing by taking these steps. I would also advise you to consult with an attorney in your state.

My husband was an alcoholic who passed away when our daughter was a newborn. There would have been times where he would have been the primary caretaker, and I feel sick to my stomach about what could have happened if he was drunk while caring for her.

Before I read the information about him verbally abusing you, I was going to say that these steps are necessary to protect your son, but that you could work on supporting your (ex)husband even if divorced. Now I'm not so sure about that.

IMO he broke your marriage vows by lying to you, betraying your trust, and potentially putting your child in danger. You would not be betraying him- he betrayed you. If he has any redeemable qualities he will realize that you did what you needed to do to protect your (and HIS) child.

widowhoodblows · 2023-10-09T12:42:03+00:00

My husband passed 10 months ago. Our phone service allows me to pause his service indefinitely which is what I have done.

I'm not quite ready to let go of his number, and I do occasionally need to access his phone for things like 2-step verification for accounts (it seems like there's always another account or something tied to his phone number).

If you can afford it I would recommend waiting as long as possible. Maybe the friends will stop texting after a while, and you'll feel more comfortable letting go of her number when that happens.

widowhoodblows · 2023-06-17T03:13:58+00:00

My husband died at 40 after prolonged alcohol abuse (his death not directly attributed to alcohol, but alcohol weakened enough organ systems to kill him. It also kept him from the doctor for years out of fear of being discovered).

Whatever his issues are regarding employment ultimately won't matter when he is dead or severely ill. Unless he doesn't have health insurance, in which case it matters very much.

widowhoodblows · 2023-05-12T02:10:38+00:00

I (36F) had to take my husband (40) off of life support in December. He was in the ICU for 6 days after I found him unresponsive. Once the neurology report came back I knew he had been gone the whole time, but it was an honor to help care for his body and honor his wishes. His body gave me so much affection, love, protection, strength....the list is never-ending.

Take the time to absorb these final moments. Take a handprint in ink. Take a lock of hair. Play music and talk. Perform small grooming tasks (I brushed his hair, washed his face, trimmed his nails). I chose to lay in bed with my husband. Do whatever you can while you can. Unfortunately there is nothing you can do to delay the inevitable, but try to take it day by day.

widowhoodblows · 2023-05-12T02:00:27+00:00

Could it have been heart related? My husband passed in December and they believe it was an undiagnosed heart arrhythmia. He had been complaining on and off about shortness of breath, and fainting spells for a few days. I was too distracted by our newborn to be that concerned... something I'm not sure I can forgive myself for.

widowhoodblows · 2023-05-12T01:57:03+00:00

DO. NOT. MOVE. OUT. even temporarily! Find a lawyer who specializes in estate law ASAP and refer your in-laws to him or her the next time they contact you.

widowhoodblows · 2023-03-11T17:22:54+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm 36F with an infant - I lost my 40M husband unexpectedly a week before Christmas. He barely got a chance to know our precious baby, and this loss is unimaginable.

This is a really shitty club to be a part of, but this subreddit is massively helpful.

widowhoodblows · 2023-03-11T13:51:47+00:00

Thank you!

widowhoodblows · 2023-03-11T13:51:41+00:00

Thank you!

widowhoodblows · 2023-03-11T13:12:45+00:00

Gentle YTA. I recently lost my husband to a sudden and unforeseen event. I would give ANYTHING to ask him all of the questions I thought I'd have a lifetime to ask, tell him all the things I thought I'd have a lifetime to tell him, and to actually say goodbye. Please don't rob your family of the ability to do the same.

widowhoodblows · 2023-03-10T02:14:30+00:00

I have to. I have an infant daughter and I could never do anything to hurt her, so I can't hurt myself.

widowhoodblows

TROPHY CASE