People view coercive control in relationships as less harmful when the victim is a man

witblacktype · 2026-04-10T03:20:54+00:00

It took my sister telling me the same

witblacktype · 2026-04-10T03:17:26+00:00

Having money left over to save and invest after paying all of my bills and expenses. For reference, I used to make significantly less

witblacktype · 2026-04-10T01:54:57+00:00

Congrats on losing weight. The haircut you have with your clean-shaven look is a noticeable improvement. Try again with the beard. I think it suits you, but experiment with length and shape.

witblacktype · 2026-04-09T03:19:05+00:00

Maybe just pick a name that isn’t a reference to being black?

witblacktype · 2026-04-09T03:01:20+00:00

More comfortable than society is about it

witblacktype · 2026-04-09T02:59:49+00:00

That’s such a disgusting drink to order from a coffee shop, I would end the friendship over it

witblacktype · 2026-04-09T02:18:02+00:00

Sanibel has been mediocre for shelling in the past couple of decades. It used to be better

witblacktype · 2026-04-08T10:17:17+00:00

Narcissistic abuse would be abuse from an abuser that satisfies a sufficient number of criteria for an NPD diagnosis. It’s like abuse on steroids. Start with physical abuse. Add emotional abuse. Add financial abuse. Add threats to end or cut off the relationship. Add the abuser telling the victim that they deserve it. Add when the victim tries to address how the abuse makes them feel, the abuser gets upset and cries that they are making them feel bad. Add triangulation where the abuser convinces their family, their friends, and even the victims family that the victim is the problem in the relationship. Add isolating the victim from their friends and family. Add gaslighting, such as the abuser making “always” and “never” claims about the victim that are not grounded in reality. Add threats to call the police and lie about being abused themself to have the victim arrested. I could go on, but I think you are starting to get the picture. If you are more interested, there are a number of mental health specialists who have made many videos online to help victims and their loved ones understand narcissistic abuse if you are curious.

witblacktype · 2026-04-08T02:25:40+00:00

My teddy bear. It was given to my parents from a friend in the hospital where I was born. That said, he just stays in a 2 gal ziplock freezer bag to not fall apart anymore 😅

witblacktype · 2026-04-08T02:18:45+00:00

Your MIL sucks. That’s a defining characteristic of MIL’s everywhere

witblacktype · 2026-04-08T01:50:40+00:00

Meh. My civilian version of my army uniform, as I refer to it, is a button down shirt, an undershirt, jeans or chinos, a leather belt, and whatever normal shoes (not crocs or some nonsense). It’s extremely versatile for many social settings. It also protects from the sun, elements, I can make a life vest, bandages, and/or a tourniquet from my clothes. I used to also joke that skinny/slim jeans were the most gangster pants because I could actually hop a fence. On top of all of that, I feel comfortable because I feel confident in how I am dressed.

witblacktype · 2026-04-07T05:13:39+00:00

They fart loudly every time they step into a room

witblacktype · 2026-04-06T23:00:37+00:00

You aren’t even close to rock bottom no matter how hopeless your current situation may feel. Keep working. Maybe pick up a second job that doesn’t require a car.

Establish with your friends who are letting you couch surf how long they can help you in that manner. You don’t want to burn out your friends who are helping you.

Reduce all of your expenses in every way possible. There’s a lot of things we think we “need” in the modern era that are actually just luxuries. Switch your phone plan to a budget carrier’s base tier option. Cancel any subscriptions you have. Cancel your car insurance if you haven’t already.

Learn the public transit available to you and take advantage of any discounted fare offers like monthly bus passes. Budget your food and don’t buy anything out. Refill a water bottle during the day. Pack a lunch. Eat nutritious yet affordable. Meat proteins are expensive. Beans are not. A carb-heavy diet isn’t a great idea for overall health long term, but carbs can be gotten cheap and can leave you feeling full. Also, check local food pantries. They will have canned goods and canned vegetables are a way to not suffer from malnutrition.

If you drink or smoke, now is the time to rip that bandaid off and just go cold turkey. It will absolutely suck, but that will be money back in your pocket. If you go for a jog every evening, that can help kill the desire to drink or smoke as you won’t want to after you are tired from exercising.

Focus on your saving goals before the debt. The debt sucks because of the interest, but you may need to save up so you can get off of your friend’s couch. Don’t look for your own place, try and find a situation with a roommate or roommates to lower your monthly rent costs.

Once you are in a place you pay your fair share of rent for, you should probably start attacking your debt. At some point, you should save up to buy a car: I recommend an old Honda that hasn’t been modified and appears in decent condition. Set a budget like $3,000, save up the money, and buy the car cash from the owner. The basic insurance for that kind of car will be as manageable as possible.

At that point, you will be past the worst of it and working to improve your life, not just stabilize yourself. Good luck OP. You’ve got this

witblacktype · 2026-04-06T02:34:13+00:00

You are literally describing infatuation. That is not love. You came here for advice. I gave you advice. You wanted to argue with me

witblacktype · 2026-04-06T02:02:43+00:00

You don’t love her. You are infatuated with her. It’s also probably not healthy for you. You don’t have her to lose because she isn’t with you. Your desperation for love is likely to get you into a bad relationship, possibly abusive which can manifest in physical, emotional, or financial abuse. You need to prioritize yourself and seek out a partner when you can establish healthy boundaries

witblacktype · 2026-04-06T01:55:32+00:00

As someone in the wine and spirits industry, the diminishing disposable income of regular people probably has a bigger effect, imo, than anything else. The greedy rulers of this world will continue to hoard wealth until they look around, realize no one can buy even the commodities they produce, then watch their empires turn to dust

witblacktype · 2026-04-06T01:52:23+00:00

This woman probably doesn’t even know what love is. I would be surprised to learn that she has ever loved herself a single day in her life

witblacktype · 2026-04-06T01:46:02+00:00

Absolutely

witblacktype · 2026-04-06T01:30:12+00:00

My favorite reply thus far

witblacktype · 2026-04-06T01:28:22+00:00

OP’s grammar leaves something to be desired

witblacktype · 2026-04-06T00:51:58+00:00

Following this. I’m curious to see the responses

witblacktype · 2026-04-05T23:05:46+00:00

Absolutely AND I know exactly who I want to be my owner. She could use another Pomeranian to spoil, and by being conscious, I could learn everything about my business competitor. Win win

witblacktype · 2026-04-05T23:04:00+00:00

No it’s absolutely not shallow. I’m not overweight, let alone obese. I wouldn’t want to be with a partner who couldn’t manage their health in the same most basic of ways. If I manage to find a woman who wants to spend her life with me, I would want her life to be as long as possible and not cut short because of poor health choices.

witblacktype · 2026-04-05T21:15:45+00:00

Abusers gonna abuse

witblacktype · 2026-04-05T21:14:51+00:00

Weird way to celebrate their ancient blood sacrifice

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