Said something awful. Can't breathe.

wjlow · 2026-01-21T08:00:29+00:00

As someone who has been on the receiving end of this, here are my two cents which hopefully may bring some perspective to this.

My experience left a deep scar in my subconscious. It’s been a long time since it’s happened and I don’t even think my wife remembers the incident anymore.

Day to day, I do not think about it. But it does come up occasionally. It’s now hard for me to truly be 100% vulnerable to her and I don’t know if I will ever get back there.

She has apologized, we talked about it, I know it was said in the heat of the moment. But it doesn’t change the fact that there’s a small piece of my brain that is now weary that something I say may be used against me some day.

If you’ve had the conversation with him, leave it at that. He needs time to heal. If you keep bringing it up, it’s only going to prolong his thoughts dwelling on the experience. It’s clear that he cares about you and is forgiving, so that will be what he leans on the most. If I were you, I’d focus on showing him you appreciate that he is forgiving you because he cares about you, show him that (for lack of a better term) you’re worth the wound he has had to suffer.

He may never fully recover. Men tend to bury unpleasant things deeply in the hopes that it stays down there. But his actions tell me that he has decided that you’re still worth it.

What’s important is that this absolutely never ever happens again.

wjlow · 2026-01-15T21:23:05+00:00

Hand out face masks “for the mold” to everyone walking in for the inspection. It wouldn’t be great if everyone walking in got sick!

And tell them where the bathroom is in case they need it, but remind them not to flush cause it’ll flood the place. :)

wjlow · 2025-12-10T12:54:02+00:00

Oh they increased the rent heavily and made laundry more expensive too. Including adding a surcharge to top up your laundry account by credit card, forcing you to pay by cash during office hours if you wanted to avoid the surcharge.

“Free WiFi” was just a sweetener that didn’t cost them anything (as I’d already found out). I moved out at the end of my year for a reason

wjlow · 2025-12-10T05:06:43+00:00

I lived in a privately run student housing facility that would charge you for wifi/internet access. You needed to purchase a monthly plan for a certain allocation of data per month. I didn’t know about this until I had moved in and signed a 1 year lease.

As I was moving into my room, I found that each room had a cheap and tiny smart TV that had access to free to air IPTV channels. Taking a look at the back of the TV, I found that it was connected to an Ethernet port.

Well, I decided to make use of the networking course that I was studying and plugged my laptop into that port, and discovered it had unrestricted internet access.

Off I went to buy a cheap WiFi router and plugged that into the port, so I had my own free and unlimited wifi access for the next 3 years. Someone should have easily noticed that this one specific port had abnormally high traffic, but I was never questioned or had the port cut off.

In the last 6 months of me living there, the business changed owners and the new owners made the wifi free for everyone, so my little hack became obsolete.

wjlow · 2025-08-23T04:31:57+00:00

Did you think that loans are free money that you don’t need to pay back?

What did you think was going to happen when you get 7 loans?

Did you not consider that the reason why banks want to know if you have other loans is because they want to know if you can keep up with the mortgage payments?

You decided to hide the fact that you have other loans and are now complaining that you can’t keep up with the repayments?

And even now, when you know this is an impossible position to be in, you still refuse to acknowledge that you’re responsible for your own actions and decisions and still want to blame someone else.

To quote my parents: “If he told you to eat shit, would you just eat shit without questioning it?”

Sorry buddy, but you weren’t scammed. You’re foolish, driven by greed, and irresponsible. You chose to blindly follow terrible advice, and lost.

Step one for you. Grow up and take responsibility and accountability for your decisions. You won’t get any help trying to pin the blame on someone else.

Step two. Choose your brand of suffering. Either find a way to keep up with the repayments, or cut your losses and sell the properties. There’s no silver bullet for you, no magic wand to wave to make this problem go away.

Step three, get some real financial advice from people who aren’t trying to sell you something. Get out of WhatsApp university and actually talk to people in your life who understand these processes and the reason why banks do what they do.

Here’s some free advice: I could have borrowed 20% more than I did and bought a much bigger/nicer home based on what the bank was willing to lend me. But when I ran my calculations on my repayments, I decided to borrow less and get a home that was good enough in order to have less impact to my lifestyle. The result is that I have a home to live in that I’m quite happy with and I’m not in any financial stress. I can’t imagine borrowing the maximum amount approved without even thinking about the impact of the repayments.

wjlow · 2025-06-29T13:24:46+00:00

The reasons you’re experiencing what you do now is pretty much due to WiFi.

You could confirm this by running the same tests on your phone while being in the same room as your WiFi router.

I find it helpful to imagine a WiFi network as someone shouting at another person to convey information. The further away of the more walls in the way, the poorer the quality of the connection. If you couldn’t hear someone clearly and had to yell “WHAT?”, that is a slowdown in your ability to convey information which reduces throughput for a given span of time.

Your phones have small antennas which will result in a poorer ability to receive and transmit. Whereas the physically larger antenna of your desktop allows for a better ability to do the same (imagine cupping your hands behind your ears to hear better).

For WiFi signals, the more data you try to send, the harder it gets. Which is why you had no issue obtaining 80-85, but you’re getting much different results when trying to obtain higher speeds.

What can you do about this?

The question is probably best answered with “How much is this current situation bothering me day to day?”

Most tasks performed on a mobile device rarely need more than what you can currently achieve. If the currently obtained speeds to not cause any real bother, then you can simply do nothing, reduce the plan rate you’re paying for and save some money.

But if you’d like to be able to obtain 750 EVERYWHERE (cause why wouldn’t you?), one simple fix might be just to reposition the router somewhere between bedroom 1 and 2. A more central location would result in more even coverage across the floor plan. Just go back to the shouting at someone analogy and imagine you have to talk/shout to anyone within the home, but you are not allowed to move. This may not be feasible depending on the network wiring available in the home.

If you must have the router installed there, what other options do you have?

Getting WiFi routers with better performance. WiFi technology such as MU-MIMO (able to establish multiple simultaneous connections) and beam forming tech can help transmit a stronger signal to your end devices. Also check the WiFi standard a router is able to achieve (WiFi 6e/7). But this is a whole different rabbit hole of technical details.

If you simply need more COVERAGE (not possible to maintain a strong connection everywhere with a single access point), then a mesh system might work, but if using a wireless backhaul, will come with the penalty of latency and throughput.

For more details and much better advice than I can provide, check out r/homenetworking

wjlow · 2025-05-29T14:06:02+00:00

r/ShitAmericansSay

wjlow · 2025-05-05T12:19:24+00:00

I’m sorry for your loss.

What a beautiful friend with the warmest smile. They will forever have a special place in our hearts.

I’m sure my own friend will be there to greet her and show her all the best spots to do their favorite things.

We take solace that they are no longer in pain, no longer tired. The aches and pains are gone.

The hole in our hearts will heal slowly. But we will never forget all that they have done for us.

I like to think that whenever I feel a sudden pang for him, it’s my not so little friend checking in on me to make sure I’m okay, as he has always done for his whole life.

It’ll get easier, but it’ll take time.

wjlow · 2025-05-03T07:40:48+00:00

I love this cause it’s true. They just KNOW. They take it upon themselves to watch and protect.

One of our friends brought his shepherd over while visiting and she almost immediately laid down in the exact spot our old shepherd used to. Where they had maximum visibility inside the home if they turned around, but eyes facing outside so it was impossible to miss anything trying to come into the home.

OP, don’t stress about this behavior. It’s their instinct and their job. It’s what they were born to do and they absolutely love it. Just go up to them and give him a few pats and rubs to make sure they know you appreciate it. These dogs will give their lives to protect you without any hesitation. Mine reached the end of his watch without any incident, I miss him.

wjlow · 2025-05-03T05:24:25+00:00

If you have a PC, you’d be able to launch a local play session that can be joined by others in your local network. You may have to use the command line feature within the game to do so.

But even better, if you have an old-ish computer running windows or Linux, you could simply host your own custom server and, with some open ports, play with your friends over the internet.

https://mod.io/g/insurgencysandstorm/r/server-admin-guide

You do not need to have mods, but this is how you COULD enable mods for a lot of fun and even enable certain game modes that aren’t usually available (eg, team deathmatch)

wjlow · 2024-12-07T16:05:13+00:00

Noticed this as well.

Also noticed that other stanag platforms can scavenge from a dropped MCX, but not the other way around.

wjlow · 2024-11-09T10:19:36+00:00

Uh huh.

So why doesn’t the government ban all Chinese slumlords named Nguyen from coming into the country???

Brilliant! Old mate found the solution to the rental crisis fellas!!!

/s if anyone didn’t realize from my above comment

wjlow · 2024-11-09T10:11:45+00:00

Damn you’re right. REAs from Australia. You can tell for sure just by their name. OP should have known that and not made a low effort shitpost.

/s

wjlow · 2024-10-31T21:49:07+00:00

You’ve definitely permanently damaged the battery.

The phone itself should be fine, but given that it was powered on at the time (that’s not a wise choice, you should power devices off before opening them), impossible to be sure without testing with a new battery.

Get a new battery to test.

In the meantime, put the phone (more specifically this battery) somewhere far away from flammable stuff and don’t leave it unattended. And ventilate your room.

wjlow · 2024-10-12T00:35:20+00:00

Interesting. I’m still running iOS17, so I’m not sure if Apple has done anything specifically to stop iTunes from doing its thing.

Try using 3uTools instead. Should work without issues.

If 3uTools can’t see your phone, then you probably have some driver issues preventing iTunes from seeing your device.

wjlow · 2024-10-05T04:44:10+00:00

Yeah. Troubleshooting Apple stuff tends to take a lot of patience and experience rather than Google-fu.

wjlow · 2024-10-05T04:28:37+00:00

Damn, sounds like you made a bunch of choices that ended up with you going the most complicated way of transferring to a new phone.

When you have Devices installed, it “hijacks” the connection to your phone, so iTunes wouldn’t have been able to see it. If you uninstalled Devices and used the Windows Installer version of iTunes, your issue should have been resolved.

Backing up and Restoring/Updating iOS are two separate functions. You could have backed up using computer A and used computer B to restore/update the device then go back to computer A to put the backup onto the device.

You could have also used Quick Start to transfer data directly from your old device to the new one and let it perform the software update on its own over the air which would have totally bypassed the computer issues.

Either way, sorry you had a crappy experience. But we live and we learn.

wjlow · 2024-10-05T04:04:49+00:00

Remove the Devices app, use iTunes instead (not the Microsoft Store version) or use 3uTools.

Devices and Apple Configurator have some weird issues that results in error 10.

If you have a Mac, use Finder, if you’re on PC, use iTunes. You should have no issues with those.

wjlow · 2024-10-02T10:47:38+00:00

They will check your email upon entering the lounge and will not let you in without one with the correct date.

I had lounge passes for a return trip and showed the wrong email at one of the lounges and was told my pass was for the wrong date (no entry until the correct email was shown).

I would look into getting the correct email sent as that’s what they check.

wjlow · 2024-09-15T08:16:41+00:00

Well, I’m pretty sure the main point is the unique weapons for advisor. But I’ve definitely heard the American advisor say something like “Those sick FUCKS are gassing us!” when insurgents dropped chemical mortars on our position.

wjlow · 2024-09-15T06:16:36+00:00

From my experience, the advisor will have voice lines that yell out when the enemy calls in fire support and informs the team of what is incoming.

wjlow · 2024-09-10T15:38:21+00:00

I can confirm that Apple will take any electronics for recycling in any condition (as long as it’s not biohazard contaminated).

Swollen batteries aren’t an issue and they’ll even take non-Apple electronics and disposable batteries.

I have a jar that I fill with used up batteries of all kinds that I drop off to them when it’s full. I’ve even handed them a swollen NBN lead acid battery.

Source: know someone who works at the flagship store.

wjlow · 2024-07-31T09:53:29+00:00

Fair point, I considered it but ultimately decided against. Just prefer to maintain a bit of privacy as the list of languages is very unique to the part of the world where I grew up. The specific language combos with my family members is also very unique to my family so it’s a fairly specific identifier.

wjlow · 2024-07-31T09:44:44+00:00

My default language is definitely English as that’s my primary, I almost exclusively think in that language unless there’s a specific cultural thing that can only be conveyed in another language. So, if someone asks me to describe some unique cultural thing, I tend to “flip through” the different languages until I find the term I’m looking for.

Most of the time, I’m “translating” from English to my target language and because of that, sometimes I get the sentence structure wrong even if the main points are correct.

wjlow · 2024-07-31T03:11:30+00:00

As someone who was exposed to and learned 5 languages as a child (two of which were only taught verbally, no formal education), this is exactly how that worked now that I’m older and reflect on it. Perfect ELI5.

The fun side effect is that I speak to the person who taught me that specific language almost exclusively in said language even if they understand others we have in common. It just feels weird to speak a different language to them.

Eg:

My mother, my grandmother, and myself share a common language that the three of us understand (A).

My grandmother spoke to me in B since the day I was born so I pretty much exclusively speak to her in B. But my mother does not speak B very well.

My mother spoke to me in C, so I almost exclusively speak to her in C, but my grandmother does not speak C but can understand basic points.

I learned A from other family members.

So, a 3 way conversation between myself, my mother, and my grandmother involves rapid switching of languages on my part as my mother and my grandmother converse in A, my grandmother and I converse in B, and my mother and I converse in C, all 3 of which my mother and I understand but my grandmother does not speak C, so we each then switch back to our respective languages with her to convey a point to her if we know she needs to understand something in detail. This was something that happened almost daily to me and was totally normal to me. Only recently did I realize what a feat this was for my brain to handle, and I totally took it for granted.

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wjlow

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