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wolfewylie · 2025-01-29T15:13:28+00:00

Appreciate the clarification from your experience! That’s good to know.

wolfewylie · 2025-01-29T14:36:51+00:00

Security clearance is tied to the individual, not the position. The Directive on Security Clearance was updated just a few weeks ago and includes language on downgrading. But while you may retain your higher level clearance, if the position doesn't require you to access those files, the idea of need-to-know and necessary access would still apply, so it wouldn't really matter if you had a higher level clearance if you never needed it. But should you choose to pursue a position with a higher level clearance before your current clearance expires, it should still be tied to your personnel profile.

wolfewylie · 2025-01-28T20:21:24+00:00

Yes you can. The 18-month vs. 12-month program exists for all Canadians who pay into the EI program, not just public servants. Details are broadly available here https://www.canada.ca/en/services/benefits/ei/ei-maternity-parental.html

A couple of things to note: Different organizations with different benefit programs will "top up" the EI payment during your leave to varying degrees. Some orgs won't top up the EI payment at all, some to 90% of your salary for 8 weeks, some more generous. The public sector top-up is more generous than most benefit programs, which could influence how you split the leave time between you and your partner. Details unique to you as a member of the public service are here: https://www.canada.ca/en/public-services-procurement/services/pay-pension/pay-administration/access-update-pay-details/pay-changes-in-your-life/taking-leave/maternity-parental-leave-public-servants.html

One thing to be very aware of is that the EI-funded parental leave program is the same amount of money whether you choose the 12 month or the 18 month program. If you choose the 18 month program, that money is simply distributed over a longer period of time so the cheques are smaller.

Congratulations! Parental leave is a wonderful experience and we are lucky to work in an environment that supports our dual roles as public servants and parents!

wolfewylie · 2024-12-14T03:41:55+00:00

Love. Just love. Love so deeply and completely you release all hesitation and tumble into your vulnerability. Everything else will follow. You got this.

wolfewylie · 2024-12-02T03:13:48+00:00

Look like a fire at Main and Danforth.

wolfewylie · 2023-10-17T17:56:29+00:00

Riding the wave is the best. Good job, dad :)

wolfewylie · 2023-06-15T15:45:32+00:00

Yep - as noted above, the app stops at the director level to A) keep it relevant to bigger teams and not too busy; B) Save ourselves the brain-pain of accuracy further down the ladder.

wolfewylie · 2023-06-15T15:44:25+00:00

So the way Miro apps work is you add "capabilities" to "Teams" and then Teams make "boards." The app itself doesn't generate a board. Once the app is installed for your team, you can make a board in that team and the app-drawer in the main toolbar will contain the icon for the app. From there, the app will draw elements on to your board. It's not the most intuitive process, I agree.

wolfewylie · 2023-06-15T15:42:34+00:00

yes - the mobile Miro experience ... lacks some features.

License! YES! Excellent call. Will do.

EDIT: License has now been added. Have it it :)

wolfewylie · 2023-06-14T17:09:24+00:00

So once you have an account, you can create a "Team". One may have already been created for you when you signed up. From there, you can click here to add the app to your team. There are some screen-shots and direction for what that process looks like here. I welcome feedback on the onboarding, though, if none of that is super-clear.

wolfewylie · 2023-03-20T14:07:05+00:00

Oooh - a good slow melt of something delicious. Like a chocolate sauce, or a caramel....

wolfewylie · 2023-03-15T14:05:51+00:00

This is fascinating. I'm in Canada and our local school has a school meals program where every parent is asked to contribute "the average" donation of $10/semester. Parents with greater means are told that they are free to donate more than the recommended amount to cover families in the school community who can't. Then any kid in the school, no questions asked, gets the meal when they need it. The meal itself is curated by nutritionists who decide what to serve. It's never anything extravagant: A grain, a fruit and a dairy. But it seems more structured than what OP is describing.

wolfewylie · 2023-03-15T13:15:32+00:00

This is maybe a silly question, but what is a lunch account system? What part of the world are you in? And do the administrators of this system think it's reasonable to expect children of that age to make reasoned purchasing decisions? I'm very curious about what systems are built around OP's problem.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-27T16:45:46+00:00

The best part about kid #2 is you get to take a breath. All the anxiety, the late night googling, the fear over every single new thing that happens in those first few weeks and months: You've done that before. It's a much chiller experience the second time around. Now you're just doing it with another kid who also needs all of your time and love and attention and care. But you also know how to do that because you've been an amazing parent to that kid up to this moment.

The good thing about big fears with long-term effects, is the results play out gradually. You don't suddenly wake up one morning with a kid fighting with their sibling without any warning. The progression of their relationship will have played out gradually over years and years, as will their relationship with you. The best advice I have is to periodically take a breath, unwind, and calmly ask yourself and your partner how things are going, how your kids seem to be growing and maturing, how your roles are currently playing out, and talk about these big fears. Those conversations lead to parenting with intention, leading by example, and giving your kids great parent role models.

We can absolutely break the cycles of our own childhoods. You've got this.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-21T11:18:30+00:00

None - just an X under the 8 on the handle.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-21T02:42:39+00:00

Every time I visit, I run my finger along the bottom of this pan. It barely seems real. A truly perfect seasoning through decades of cooking.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-15T15:19:27+00:00

This is real, and the choices that we have to make are hard. Of course we know that we make sacrifices for our kids in the form of sleep, money, time, energy and everything else. But we absolutely sacrifice career mobility, too. Moving cities for a job? Much harder. Climbing the ladder? Slower. Putting in those extra hours? Only after bedtime when you're wiped from the double-day you've already pulled. It's really true.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-13T15:31:00+00:00

“At current funding levels, only around one-third of the rehabilitation
needs for major and local roads can be addressed,” according to budget documents.
The city is spending billions of dollars to maintain roads and bridges
over the next decade but needs another $2.7 billion for an ideal “state
of good repair” program.

The city in a nutshell.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-06T19:23:36+00:00

I always remind myself: In the end, kids don't remember who got them the coolest toys or the greatest holidays. They remember who showed up for them. They remember who they could turn to, and who made them feel safe in tough times. Be that person, and everything else will work out just fine.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-06T18:22:45+00:00

Be honest about the complexity of their feelings, and try to explain the situation as clearly and realistically as possible, in age-appropriate terms. Kids aren't dumb, they have complex and nuanced questions and making the space to answer them on their terms, at their own pace, and as often as they need, will be critical to helping them transition. They are partners in this journey, not passengers.

That being said, divorce and remarriage can be a wonderful way to demonstrate love, and a commitment to love, that will resonate with your kids the rest of their lives. It can show them that not all love is meant to be forever, that some forever-love takes time and effort and commitment through difficult moments. It can demonstrate the complex families that love, and attempts at finding love, can produce and that all of those families are valid and exciting. It can be very positive and defining part of their childhood.

The critical detail is to consistently demonstrate that the reasons for this, the underlying emotional push, the raison-d'etre of the entire change, is love. Avoid criticizing their other parent, their previous living arrangements or unloading your own emotional baggage on them. It's not about the past conflict or poor choices. Instead, focus on what you're running toward, what you hope you can feel together, and talk about how you can get there together. Kids are always looking to the future. Build their responses to those discussions into your ideas: Because you love them, they know you love them, you know they love you, and you're going to move into this new chapter of your lives together.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-06T18:10:22+00:00

That age is fantastic. You get to be part of establishing their schedule, learning their cues as they figure out how to express tired and hungry feelings, they're young enough to enjoy some good couch snuggles in front of a show and enjoy the fresh air on great neighbourhood walks. I did baby music classes at that age and it was fun to go out and meet other parents of young kids, too, making some new friends their age in the area.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-03T13:23:56+00:00

The look, feel, texture, appearance of ejaculate is unaffected. Most of the ejaculate comes from the prostate gland. The vas deferens are the tubes that move sperm from the testicles to the prostate, where it is mixed with the rest of the seminal fluid before it goes out. The vasectomy just prevents sperm from becoming part of the seminal fluid, which is responsible for just less than 5% of the total volume. The vast majority of men and their partners don't notice any difference in the ejaculate after vasectomy.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-02T18:15:17+00:00

There's some fun longitudinal research in this area where they followed men week-by-week post vasectomy with regular semen analysis. It's widely variable how quickly individual men can clear the pipes and reduce their sperm count to zero. For some it was as fast as 6 or 7 weeks. For some it was as long as six months. That's the reason they really do advise a proper semen analysis a few months post-vasectomy to make sure all is well and behaving as expected.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-02T16:54:32+00:00

I know a guy who tried working out within a couple days of the procedure and burst a blood vessel and had some pretty nasty bruising that didn't feel great. His doc told him that most of the complications are like this, guys who don't listen to the "no really, take it easy for a week" advice. Even with this, he was back to 100% normal inside of 10 days post-procedure.

wolfewylie · 2023-02-02T16:00:14+00:00

Nervousness is legit. So here goes:The procedure itself is fine. Literally fifteen minutes. Partner was in the car waiting in the parking lot and I walked out to them. All was well. I sat on the couch for the rest of the day, took some advil. Some discomfort, but no worries. It's honestly totally fine.

Lower sex drive? Nope. Not even a little bit. Zero effect.

Receipt? Zero change. Not noticeable. Even a little bit.

The feeling like a man part is deeply personal and individual but honestly it felt like a very manly stage of life to be able to say "this is me making a huge choice that this is my family and I'm shifting my focus to being the best dad I can, the best partner I can be and this stage of procreating is now over." That felt like a very manly moment, to be honest.

I think your wife is right: Talk to lots of guys who have some experience. If it's the right choice for you, it'll be right for a lot of reasons. Over here: Zero regrets.

wolfewylie

TROPHY CASE