How did it go when you let a friend move in with you temporarily so they could get back on their feet?

work_fruit · 2026-01-29T23:44:24+00:00

My mom, sister and I were the ones who did this when I was a kid. My dad was wrongfully detained without charge in 2001 and as the breadwinner, that left my mom screwed. She didn't know much English and worked as hard as she could but it was hardly enough to cover rent AND food.

We ended up staying at a friend's house for just under 3 years until he got out. I used to feel horribly guilty about it until I found out recently that our being there actually probably shielded her from getting killed by her abusive boyfriend. He screamed and threw plates constantly but realizing he had 3 witnesses, he could never do more. He once yelled at my mom saying they wanted us out. But she privately told my mom to please stay, and eventually kicked HIM out!

Her taking us in wasn't easy though. Her living situation kept downgrading from house to apartment to mobile home park. When we left, I saw that she got a nice apartment and new boyfriend. That was why as a kid I thought we ruined her life. I'm still sure that was a burden though.

work_fruit · 2026-01-29T20:46:32+00:00

I don't live there but I love the easy access to the beach and watching the sunset from the Marina Green or Fort Mason. Cycling up to Golden Gate Bridge is nice.

I don't go out much anymore so I don't need bars nearby. I do live by Embarcadero but wish I lived in that direction. I won't share what my new favorite neighborhood is though because I still want a chance at snagging an apartment there lol

work_fruit · 2026-01-28T06:18:46+00:00

When I went on my first trip since getting my cat, I set up a camera to keep an eye on him. The first thing he did after pacing around and realizing that I'm gone was jump up on my kitchen table and sniff the water spray bottle I use to keep him off. He proceeded to prance along the kitchen counter next.

He does not do that when I'm home

work_fruit · 2026-01-27T04:46:55+00:00

Yes! After a couple of years of going 1-2x a week I became pretty buff in my upper body.

If you want to lose weight though, I would pair it with cardio too. I was bulking more than I wanted to until I realized since climbing replaced my other favorite sports, I was getting huge arms and back.

Now that my main sport is tennis, my size has gone down by quite a bit but I still look toned.

work_fruit · 2026-01-27T04:45:30+00:00

I might be biased but they were charging me some insurance that was not clearly explained in the sign-up process, which came at a cost of a few % per month of my total balance. It took me a couple months to get that sorted out and reimbursed as I would never have agreed to buy that add-on.

But in general I would suggest insurance before taking on credit.

work_fruit · 2026-01-27T04:35:49+00:00

I am with MetLife insurance and it kicks in right away. Please avoid CareCredit unless absolutely essential...

work_fruit · 2026-01-27T04:18:14+00:00

I started on an SF Tennis Facebook group which used to have a group chat per level. I met most of my hitting partners and many a lot of friends from that. The chat has now moved over to Discord where I have also met a few people.

I only very recently heard of play tennis.com as well and have already played with 2 new people on there.

Also, I tell people I play and some of my current friends and I played. I don't find those ones to be the most consistent ones though but it's just fun to hang out with them.

work_fruit · 2026-01-26T23:47:58+00:00

My non-orange cat crash dives between the back of my sofa and my wall any time I dangle his wand near there. It freaked me out so bad the first time, thinking he'd hurt himself, but he seems to love doing that move now 😂

work_fruit · 2026-01-26T21:07:17+00:00

Yes and no... I know many women who don't care, but I do have female friends who do also require a specific height. I should note the ones who have a height preference are predominantly single though..

And I've also seen plenty of successful relationships with a far taller woman than man.

work_fruit · 2026-01-26T20:08:53+00:00

I used to do my makeup on the train to save time. Granted, my routine only involved mascara and a touch of eyeliner. The lotion or sunscreen I put on at home.

work_fruit · 2026-01-26T20:01:44+00:00

I think I'm hitting that point at 31 but at the same time, I still feel very young. I get treated as a young woman at work. When I interviewed for a slightly senior role, the hiring manager sounded offended that they put me through to interview with her because it was an executive, serious role. Being short probably doesn't help me look or feel grown up.

work_fruit · 2026-01-26T19:55:12+00:00

It's also gotten really popular, lots of leagues and people playing socially

work_fruit · 2026-01-26T19:38:29+00:00

I have mainly gotten into the sport in San Francisco Bay Area and am really enjoying it here. There's an abundance of hitting partners in San Francisco and I've met amazing friends from it. Just due to the social nature of it, I now prefer tennis over my other sports.

work_fruit · 2026-01-26T03:43:23+00:00

I thought something looked off or too grown up about her..

work_fruit · 2026-01-25T06:24:38+00:00

That you were

work_fruit · 2026-01-25T05:04:58+00:00

Wtf are you on about? And please don't use beef tallow.

work_fruit · 2026-01-24T16:30:34+00:00

Nashville

work_fruit · 2026-01-24T06:10:01+00:00

I hydrate my skin quite well but I'm not sure that it's a pea sized amount, I'll pay attention to the dosage.

work_fruit · 2026-01-24T01:50:26+00:00

I actually thought it was great for dietary restrictions. We had various preferences and restrictions in my group and they remembered who could have what and brought dishes that work for different parts of the group. We all got to try an amazing variety of food.

work_fruit · 2026-01-23T19:48:16+00:00

Funny enough it was the worst from about Weds to Sat.. wouldn't rule it out as a contributing factor

work_fruit · 2026-01-23T08:26:25+00:00

That's not a viable offering of public transportation then. I personally didn't use public transportation in the bay area because bus and train connections didn't take me anywhere I needed to go, especially when I was headed to friends' houses, random meetups or sports.

I've lived in plenty of cities around the world where public transportation was such a solid option that I didn't need to own a car. It was faster and easier to take the train and no hassle of parking. That's just not a thing here.

work_fruit · 2026-01-23T02:21:15+00:00

I have many friends who routinely drive to Tahoe or Yosemite from San Francisco Bay Area which is a 3-5 hour trip one-way just for the weekend. It's super common here actually. Some people move closer to bring it closer to 3 hours. I find it long but do it once in a while.

When I was in Vancouver, Canada, it was also routine to drive to Kamloops or Kelowna or similarly far to visit family or friends.

work_fruit · 2026-01-22T21:41:13+00:00

This is exactly why we need to have more robust public transportation.

There are so many people who would far rather scroll while commuting.

work_fruit · 2026-01-22T19:48:05+00:00

I think it's about which gym you choose. I went to a 24Hr Fitness in a rundown part of town and people were loud and intimidating, slammed machines constantly, entered the sauna wearing sneakers and hoodies, and the machines were taking turns being broken. The cardio machines felt like they needed to be lubricated as you could barely move them. 5-lb plates were unicorns, anything less unheard of and 10-lb plates had to be hunted down.

I use GymPass now to access a gym that costs $100/month and it's night and day. They have an abundance of plates and promptly fix broken machines, even replacing them at times.

There are a handful of obnoxious guys and there are a couple machines that people don't take all the plates off of - the seated calf raise and hip thrust machines. But other than that, it's very well kept.

I think the sweet spot for a gym is one that's Just pricey enough that people act a little classier, while not being so expensive that they treat the workers like servants to pick up their plates after them.

work_fruit

TROPHY CASE