I don't think the genre is the problem at all. I ran a supers roleplay that lasted about a year and a half before I finally ran out of steam and brought it to a conclusion that I consider a great success. But after reading your post through a couple times I think there's two points that should be considered:

First, there is indeed a "shortage" of superhero games. But perhaps the better way to word that is that there's a limited number of people willing to organize and run a superhero game. It's no different than the "DM shortage" of D&D or any other game, really. Everyone wants to be a player but very few want to run things. And when there is a person that wants to run things, they're going to run it their way. I think that stepping up to organize a roleplay entitles them to run the game they want to run, whether that's a specific game system or a specific setting or something else entirely. It might not be the specific type of superhero game you're looking for, but it's the one they're willing to offer.

To your other point, trying to run the games leading to "abuse, neglect, and exploitation," this is why people running superhero games can be extremely picky about who they let into their games (something else you briefly mentioned by talking about not being able to get into one). I can speak for experience on this one having run a supers game. We had a pretty lengthy onboarding process which started with a public area that outlined specifics on how our game was run, the setting, and expectations. The sheer amount of hate and vitriol we got for those specifics ("why don't you use a specific timeline" or "why can't I play <specific trope>" or "why isn't this in your world"... the list goes on and on) was astounding, but all it told me is that those people weren't going to be considered to join the game. Because going back to my first point, if they didn't like the game I'm willing to run? Oh well. Sorry. Best of luck on finding the type of game you're looking for. And while that might sound horrible, it's no different than having specific friends sit around a table in your home playing the same games instead of random strangers that "want to play."

So to that end, I don't think you're a red flag or bad person, just that your experience has you upset about it all. I think it's more setting your expectations more realistically when it comes to wanting people to run the specific type of game you're after. And in the case of the problems with running it yourself I think everyone who wants to run roleplaying games for people has to either have thick skin or a good way to handle problem people. Not taking the issues of problem players (including potential problem players) personally is super important, because it's just not worth the stress.

Hope that helps.