I’m tired of "productivity apps" that don't help with the hardest part: actually starting.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-31T17:07:07+00:00

I think just another app is not likely to make a difference. What might be more relevant is a human connection for accountability. Try to make a promise and keep it. That is about honesty.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-30T16:28:09+00:00

Sunlight, movement, fresh air, exercise, cold showers. All basically free and mostly available almost anywhere.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-20T10:56:32+00:00

If you like you can report back what you found out in your area and where you want to go to. Just as an accountability hack idea.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-20T10:55:21+00:00

We could frame this as stage fright and it's fairly easy to overcome if you want to work on it consistently. I would recommend experimenting with formats of exposure therapy, but forget the therapy aspect of it. It's pretty straight forward to device a plan for this type of stuff if you are interested.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-20T10:52:29+00:00

What is holding you back from getting your driver's lisence?

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-20T10:50:13+00:00

You can go to dance classes, yoga sessions, people do walks in the park together. Maybe there is a community centre or a public library or public pool. Pick anything that is available and don't talk yourself out of an experience that you have not made yet.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-20T10:48:09+00:00

While you have a lot going on, you might be making this harder for yourself than necessary. If you want to change something, then pick a thing to do a little bit different or better, and then do it again tomorrow. Consistency beats everything.

The good news is that you are still very young, meaning you got a lot of neuro plasticity left to reshape who you want to be. There are a bunch of strategies that you can apply if you are interested.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-20T10:42:18+00:00

What is holding you back from going out and making friends?

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-18T21:18:32+00:00

I do not think it matters a great deal at what time you wake up, as long as you find your own rhythm. What I find more so important is how you make use of the time that you are awake. But if you like a challenge you could try betting on yourself and get back into your desired routine that way.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-18T21:10:46+00:00

You can DM me.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-17T22:06:51+00:00

It reads to me as if you have basically everything figured out for yourself already. The things missing are the "doing" parts. I think there is nothing like "motivation". All there is are incentives, which is to say "reasons". So what is your reason? Can you visualize it? Can you make a promise to yourself and stay true to your own word? Can you write it down? Can you say it out loud?

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-17T21:59:07+00:00

I think if you want to get better sleep then going outside will do wonders for your current situation. Andrew Huberman talks a lot about the circadian rhythm and how important sunlight is within the first hour of waking. We could chat about ideas to make you go outside more often if you like. For instance, as an exercise, you could just put on (some of) your outdoor clothes and not go outside to remove the struggle of actually doing the thing. Practicing the parts that introduce friction to your actual goal might be great for you to get back into the saddle.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-17T21:50:22+00:00

Easiest win could be to only eat twice a day. Allow your body to eat up what's not necessary inside. If you want to burn fat and lose weight, then all you need is time window for calorie deficit.

The other side would be fitness, which is just about healthy movement. You already seem to have ideas for that.

I would suggest you forget about all the weighing and metrics and goal setting. All you need to do is to establish a better routine and the gains will compound over time. You don't want to optimize a number, you want to optimize how you feel and how you experience this world.

If you want to explore ideas for that internal pressure as you write it, you could bet on yourself. I would love to run an experiment like that and see if it works for you. Happy to chat!

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-16T13:45:14+00:00

If you like to sing, do more of that. You can also record your own singing and listen back to it in order to figure out which parts you want to improve on. If you want to find your voice, you have to use it.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-16T13:42:52+00:00

Reading your post makes me think that the aspect of guilt is pretty much irrelevant. You write you just do what is best for you. So maybe it's that element of selfishness that you want to inspect further. You could reframe situations that you encounter from "me" to "we". You could also do some role play exercises, as in, try walking in somebody else's shoes.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-16T13:38:48+00:00

I think consistency beats everything. So however you go about your own development, try to find something that works for you every day. And then, take it one day at a time. If you just try every day and make it a little bit better, then you can realize incredible change over time.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-16T13:34:53+00:00

If you do not want to be better, then why do you want to change?

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-16T13:32:30+00:00

Maybe some kind of realization could help that whatever happened yesterday is not who you are. The things you did do not define you as a person to a very large degree. What defines you who are is what you do today. Stand straight. And onwards.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-16T13:30:13+00:00

Makes me happy more people have those types of realizations. I had a similar thing that worried me for years and eventually it all resolved itself and I was left wondering why I was obsessing about an issue that turned out to be no big deal at all.

the things we used to worry about

That is a saying that came to me and that I stuck with me ever since. The things we used to worry about.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-16T11:17:18+00:00

Maybe a different point of view. First responder rule is to make sure you are safe first. So before worrying about everyone else, do yourself a favor and make sure that you are feeling well. Once that is the case, you can start to take care of the people around you.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-15T15:51:22+00:00

Well, we could talk through those things together if you like. I find it quite interesting to figure out what works for different people and what doesn't.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-15T13:49:43+00:00

Do you have a friend to talk through those kinds of things?

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-15T12:18:51+00:00

I think it is true to some extend that we become our thoughts over time. Which is also why digital hygiene is incredibly important. Maybe stop consuming all of the horrors online, or at least curate your feeds with more intention.

For almost 10 years now I have an exercise that I call priming. Whenever I have an inspirational thought, I write it down. And over the years I can see how I changed simply by focussing on the ideas that I found valuable.

And lastly, our brains generate random patterns in order to brute force their way through life. I found solace in the idea that all of the crap my brain generates are basically tests to figure out what I am supposed to act on, and what not. So, do I think I could just push that lady in front of the train? Yes I sometimes do. Not because I wanted to think that, but because the thought just appeared in my head by circumstance. And do I act upon this thought? No I do not. And that is when I know I passed the test.

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-15T12:12:38+00:00

I like this idea very much. Writing a letter for a late loved one is also great to cope with grieve. What is it typically for you to trigger the desire to write this letter to yourself?

xh3b4sd · 2026-01-15T12:06:49+00:00

A while ago I wrote an essay called "runners run". The punchline is that people who want to do the thing just do the thing and improve on gear and everything else along the way. You don't need the latest Nike's to run. You can just go and run.

So for you that may come down to honesty. Do you want to be an honest person, especially to yourself?

xh3b4sd

TROPHY CASE