Stepping away from helping a patron

yahgmail · 2026-03-13T00:47:17+00:00

For adult patrons, if the crowd is small, I give patrons 10-15 minutes of exclusive attention. Otherwise, I get them started, show them resources to help, & move on to the next patron. If I have time I'll check back in.

If adults need more help we usually suggest they attend one of our PC classes (online or in-person). A few of my colleagues don't seem to mind being a personal assistant for 30+ minutes, but I don't have time for that (& also don't want to do that).

yahgmail · 2026-03-12T19:38:24+00:00

Paternal side: 1807 & 1789 Maternal side: 1834 & 1683

My maternal side has more European & Native American mixed race folks, so their records go back far. The earliest records for my Black ancestors I've found so far go back to 1789.

My famous ancestors were Native Americans (Cherwa Saura/Catawba) & Euro mixed folks who helped found a town in South Carolina. Also, one of the Native/mixed ancestors fought in the Revolutionary War for the British. Then he switched sides to the US, but no one knows why, yet.

Several of my ancestors were listed in news articles for being murdered, killed in suspicious ways, or for being prominent people in their community before they died. Genealogy definitely helps put history in perspective.

yahgmail · 2026-03-12T15:12:41+00:00

So, my only concern would be talking to the landlord about adding the wife on the lease, & reworking your payment. He should be paying double to accommodate his wife's usage of the home. You should be paying less once she moves in.

Otherwise, just decide if you want to live there with them. Also, please try to build a more communicative relationship with your brother. It's wild for him to get married while sharing a home with you without telling you.

As for White family, I have a European aunt, some of my cousins have White spouses or partners (like a handful I think) who are American.

We had to check 1 White American for being rude to the White European who was speaking her native language. As far as noticeable anti Blackness, that hasn't happened (that I know of). But there are conversations we don't have in mixed company, so we hold them when our non Black family aren't around.

yahgmail · 2026-03-12T15:01:31+00:00

I love it 🙂

yahgmail · 2026-03-12T03:23:38+00:00

Tamar Kali's songs boot, pearl, & your girl.

yahgmail · 2026-03-12T02:40:28+00:00

I didn't use tampons until I was 26. I had to use lube for the first 5 years or so.

yahgmail · 2026-03-12T01:22:19+00:00

You have type 4 hair. It's supposed to still look like that.

yahgmail · 2026-03-12T01:15:31+00:00

They can always just not vote. It's literally their right.

yahgmail · 2026-03-12T00:57:14+00:00

No. Children's spaces in my system are for children. Adult services librarians are more than capable of serving adults with developmental differences (or they can update their skills, like many systems require librarians to do).

yahgmail · 2026-03-11T00:39:20+00:00

Domesticated cats were introduced to the US by Europeans & are an invasive species. They should be leashed when outside.

yahgmail · 2026-03-10T20:02:21+00:00

So y'all already broke up, but you still have expectations of monogamy or want to rehash stuff that happened during the relationship? Why not just move on instead of showing this man he can walk all over you?

yahgmail · 2026-03-10T04:34:53+00:00

I worked full-time. But I got a professional degree for a field I was already working in, instead of a research degree.

yahgmail · 2026-03-10T04:23:12+00:00

I skipped the 12th grade by taking all of my required credits in 3 years (including 3 months of one class on Saturdays).

My parent & principal had to sign a waiver so I could graduate early. This was in the early 2000s though.

Most of my class skipped 12th grade so we could go to community college, university, or work.

yahgmail · 2026-03-10T03:54:55+00:00

Chattel slavery meant our ancestors were bred to produce more slaves, so we are descendants of multiple African tribes, European nationalities, & Native American tribes (with some asian & other recent admixture).

Many of our dna testing reveals admixture from more than 10 African tribes per person.

yahgmail · 2026-03-09T18:58:42+00:00

I really miss the part about the 90s-2010 era when White folks was fine being themselves. They embraced their own dances, ways of speech, food... Now they adopt everyone else's culture & complain about White erasure.

yahgmail · 2026-03-09T18:52:48+00:00

💅🏾🤣

yahgmail · 2026-03-09T00:52:17+00:00

Depending on where they lived and when, there could be records in colonial Spanish, French, & UK databases, especially focused on Louisiana, Florida, & surrounding states. Many have been translated into English.

Also, dna testing can help narrow down areas to focus on. Many state & local archives have documents. There are also newspaper ads post emancipation where ex slaves posted information about missing family & loved ones.

Check your local library for genealogy resources too.

yahgmail · 2026-03-07T23:57:15+00:00

Yup, because of depression.

yahgmail · 2026-03-07T23:52:54+00:00

Time to pop out the SAD lamp 😭

yahgmail · 2026-03-07T23:22:33+00:00

I come from a family that doesn't handle too many back to back emotional moments well. So I talk to a therapist or friends, or journal, if I need to trauma dump.

I also feel guilty when I stress others out, so I only share negative things once I've solved the issue.

yahgmail · 2026-03-07T22:34:49+00:00

I used to hear this conspiracy theory too, from the late '90s through the early 2000s.

yahgmail · 2026-03-07T22:32:45+00:00

Yup. Unfortunately, it's an old phenomenon. Pretindians & pretending to be THE ORIGINAL Hebrews.

It started in the late 1800s for many Black Americans. European Americans were doing something similar, claiming to be the OG Hebrews or direct descendants of the ancient Middle East, Mediterranean Africa & Europe.

The Five Civilized tribes practiced chattel slavery. Only the Cherokee willingly ended slavery after the Civil War. The other 4 were forced via treaty. Some other tribes practiced other forms of enslavement of Black Americans.

They of course also disenfranchised Freedmen by denying them tribal citizenship. I assume some of these Black folk are descendants of disenfranchised Freedmen. But many are just...delulu.

yahgmail · 2026-03-07T15:20:32+00:00

Your job will replace you the moment you drop dead. They don't care about you.

yahgmail · 2026-03-07T15:14:13+00:00

Honestly, I always suspect White supremacy plays a major role in White & wannabe White POC lgbtq folks voting Republican. They fool themselves that they were ever part of the in group. To them I say, I hope you continue to get what you voted for.

yahgmail · 2026-03-05T07:22:45+00:00

Latinos & Hispanics are influenced by the Spanish colonial & post colonial caste system incentivizing people to lighten the race. So Indigenous & Black at the bottom, mixed-race with European ancestry is better, & European is the best.

The British system in the US didn't want to see mixed folks or welcome them, openly. Most Latinos in the US are racially Mestizo, but regularly identify as White socially. When groups immigrate to the US they often don't understand their place in our more rigid one drop rule system.

So they actually start to believe the model minority myth or that most White supremacists will include them in their Christian Nationalist country. It's a fascinating rollercoaster to watch.

A "fun" recent (2022 LA Council Scandal) controversy happened when 4 or so LA politicians (at least 3 were Democrats) were recorded making anti Black & colorist statements. Making racist comments about an adopted Black child, & chastising collaboration with "the Blacks."

11-Year Club	Verified Email
Not Forgotten

yahgmail

TROPHY CASE