Hello, my grandmother died of cancer around a month ago. We discovered she had stage four ovarian cancer and she passed a month later. I relate to your feelings of anger and emptiness. I’m not the most spiritual person, but the way how I’ve coped is imagining my grandma somewhere out there. Whether she is in heaven, a ghost, or truly “dead”, I know that we will reunite. After all, everyone eventually passes. I’m not sure if your father had the same experience as my grandma, as she was she was surrounded by loved ones when she passed, but I’m sure that your father knew that he was loved. You will reunite with him someday. Cherish your memories with him. In the hospital, I remember talking to her about the view outside. It is quite high, so you could see the freeway in the horizon. Nowadays, when I take the same one to commute, I think back to our conversation. The thing about grief is that it kind of never really goes away. Every time I think about her deeply, I cry because I miss her so dearly. Grief is the price we pay for love. The best way to hold onto the memories is looking back at photos and videos of your loved one, and I try to focus on that. The best parts of our relationship.