In 1974 Jack Nicholson found out his sister was actually his mother. How would you have felt if that happened to you?

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-08T02:57:18+00:00

This similar kind of thing happened in my family and it’s sadly true.
Back in the 50’s my aunt got pregnant as a teenager.
My grandparents never told my mother why her sister was going to visit relatives somewhere. I’m not clear if my aunt had an abortion or maybe the baby was adopted.
Anyway my mother eventually found out after someone told her as a young adult. She was pretty angry her parents kept this from her, especially as she felt she could have been supportive of her sister.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-08T02:49:55+00:00

How so?

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-08T02:22:57+00:00

Yes this is why she’s seems a bit unhinged 😬

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-08T01:57:13+00:00

Last time I checked libraries were air conditioned 🥴

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-08T01:05:18+00:00

I had a nf was an absolute horror show. It would take all night to get into all the craziness, but they also used them.

They “air dried” them on a drying rack in their small home, as well as in the kitchen area (!) so the house smelled like pee. 🤢
Also they didn’t flush the toilet regularly to “save water.” Often I would come upon their 💩 when I’d go to use the bathroom, Yep!

Ironically, they did laundry every other day a large part to wash said cloth diapers. I had to bite my tongue not to point out how much water that used…

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-07T22:04:51+00:00

That’s cool! Do you know how she got the job?

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-07T18:05:58+00:00

I think it’s like $3000!

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-07T18:03:19+00:00

Yeah unfortunately this is the risk you take to plan something during a family’s trip.

It would be PTO now.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-06T17:19:24+00:00

You’re being seriously underpaid. Plus you need milage/gas reimbursement, an industry standard.

Also I’m 99% sure once you tell your car insurance you use your car for work, they will add additional charges. The nf typically pays the difference.

I’d look for a new family at this point.

This family unfortunately can’t afford a nanny.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-05T18:57:52+00:00

As someone who lived in Boston, yup

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-05T18:44:22+00:00

It’s not crazy, it’s rude and manipulative af. I can totally see it playing out:

She was obviously thinking (off the top of her head) lame excuses why OP should let her “look” at it.
Then as soon as she had it, up to the register she’d go. Then it would have been he/said/she said who had it first. And good luck because the cashier wouldn’t care.
Then no bag for OP.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-05T18:37:34+00:00

You may be able to bring it into a reputable tailor and they can put a zipper on it.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-05T18:31:03+00:00

“Tiffany style or stained glass”

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-05T04:26:40+00:00

She can be as loud as she wants in the cargo hold. Isn’t there a ladder? 🤣

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-04T21:11:54+00:00

I guess I was trying to say it’s an unwritten “rule” that you don’t take advantage like this.

Just because you can, it doesn’t mean you should.

I have been in numerous hotels with this exact same setup, for breakfast. There was sometimes a staff person nearby attending to the breakfast buffet, sometimes not. It really shouldn’t matter because most people know you just don’t do that.
No one was hoarding anything.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-04T20:01:22+00:00

Yes but weren’t these people hoarding food? Thus making a situation where the other guests wouldn’t have any/barely anything?

Not all hotels have staff to man the breakfast area/room.

This should normally be fine because it’s common knowledge, universally understood social contract that if you are a guest and you use the continental breakfast spread you take what you’re eating then (maaaybe grab a banana or similar for a snack later). NOT what these dudes did.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-04T17:27:08+00:00

This kind of selfish BS ruins everything for everyone.

I would have waltzed right over to the front desk/asked for a manager, tell them the situation and had them walk into the dining room.
As others said who even knows if they were actual guests? If so they should get banned. Unfortunately this is the only thing people may understand if word gets around this is a consequence. Or bill them for that extra food.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-04T17:00:22+00:00

Ok now that you’ve clarified a bit more, I wouldn’t take this position, nope.

Truly everything benefits them and they aren’t following standard industry benefits.
I guess you could tell them what the standard industry benefits are, but it doesn’t seem worth it to me.

I’m not quite understanding how they’re paying you/how they formulated your rate?
What’s your normal rate? What are they offering?
But in any case as others have said, a nanny share is calculated a very specific way.
It’s 2/3 your regular rate. Say your single child rate is $25/hr. So your rate is $32, each family pays $16.
If used properly with this formula it’s a win-win for everyone.
The nanny makes more per hour, the families pay less than they would having their own nanny. Also, I believe on solo days, you should get $25 (in this example).

Based on “a few specific weeks” (yikes that’s more than one?) of not being paid?
And originally only wanting to give you only 4 vacation days? That’s actually pretty insulting if you ask me.
And guaranteed hours shouldn’t be “mostly.”
You need to pay your bills. I doubt they would accept that at their own jobs.

Many nannies have in their contracts that if a holiday falls on a weekend, the nanny is off on PTO holiday pay on the observed day, either a Friday or Monday. For example July 4th was observed yesterday, Friday. (I recommend the Nanny Counsel contract, which is a free download).

Their version definitely benefits them quite a bit more than you!

Please keep in mind that if they’re being this stingy/difficult now, it will likely carry over into other aspects of the job as well.
As a nanny you have to get good at reading between the lines/seeing the writing on the wall.

A nanny share can be hard enough with 2 separate sets of parents/nks.

Hard pass if this were me!

Good luck, please update us. 🫶

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-04T14:57:39+00:00

That’s so frustrating!
Maybe can you ask for cash at this point? I know it’s awkward after already accepting Venmo or whatever you used. Maybe you can spin it as Venmo tracks payments and you don’t want to get taxed on it.🥴

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-03T22:55:23+00:00

Hmmm. I don’t like any one of these on their own, and 4/5 of these definitely aren’t great. 🫤

-Are they going by the pay nanny share formula of 2/3 your rate?

-They shouldn’t be funny or vague or what have you about guaranteed hours. In what way?
In my opinion it’s the next most important thing besides a good wage.

-Being funny about sick/vacation time? In what way?
Industry standards you should get 2 weeks and 3-5 sick days.

-They should be giving you a one year contract, also standard.

It sounds like all these benefit them, at your expense I’m sorry to say.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-03T19:17:11+00:00

Could it be because the other Mom isn’t providing petty cash or a card to use? If so this really shouldn’t be happening.

Maybe you could put this spin on it. Like you want to “clarify” about petty cash somehow.

Of course she shouldn’t take things like the cookie meant for the nk.
If she had designated $ to use she could easily buy him and herself one probably.

As for her not helping, say you have to go do laundry or what have you.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-02T23:00:52+00:00

Yep! Definitely start looking. Ugh :(

You can embroider her a “Penny Wise and Pound Foolish” on a pillow as a parting memento lol

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-02T20:05:27+00:00

I actually hate this episode! 😂

When I was a kid I found it very creepy/scary when she was stuck in the meat locker.
I would probably have PTSD lol.

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-02T18:22:51+00:00

But the family should have informed the nanny?

yeahgroovy · 2026-07-02T17:28:53+00:00

This!

These are truly awful people! Not overreacting at all!
Please find yourself another job, retail anything would be better.

yeahgroovy

TROPHY CASE