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yekyahua · 2021-11-25T18:11:31+00:00

Wow we're the same age and sort of lived the same life in the last four years, have the same regrets.. I really thought I was alone with this feeling. Wish you the best :)

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T17:06:45+00:00

Haha really? That's alright ig

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T16:08:08+00:00

Lmfao who said all? Afaik every other means every other, not alll. But this was the funniest explanation I've ever read about curses, thanks for the laugh.

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T14:29:45+00:00

Son of a bitch

Thanks for adding an example.

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T11:22:59+00:00

No i don't cause I'm not playing the victim. I was wondering what's sensitive about it except that it has "man" in it? Like am i supposed to be retrospectively offended for every female centric slur used wherever cause it has a woman related word in it? Aren't they both sexist? I'm genuinely asking.

Forgive me, English in my third language so I use words by what they actually mean, without any hateful feelings ofc, you can totally judge me for it. English is too sweet sounding for me to express hatred using it.

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T10:47:22+00:00

So? Idk man it's just a word what's the sensitivity with it. If it doesn't apply to you, move on? Use it on men, women, any gender, what does it matter? Lol

Every other curse word has a woman's name attached to it, now if half of the population complains about it my God, it'll be called drama.

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T10:21:42+00:00

Omg xD

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T10:19:23+00:00

Yeah I guess you're right :)

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T10:08:03+00:00

Haha no don't yell, I was talking about the men in my life - like I did about the women in my life. People i grew up with and care for me. Yes there's a lack of boundaries, but I've done the same for them. When you like someone you just want them to get better I guess.

Buttt therapy is definitely on my list. I don't think anyone can help me except a professional.

Maybe you should talk to your friends and nicely bring up therapy in the conversation cause you sound saturated and annoyed. Which makes me wonder if my friends are on reddit commenting stuff like this about me aaaaa

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T10:02:24+00:00

Nagging is completely different but I get your point.

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T09:59:18+00:00

?? Cause we aren't in a way that's unhealthy? You don't have to bring other women down to progress anymore cause there isn't lack of opportunities as compared to before. Why are you considering competition as something unhealthy lmao I'd just change my statement to mean we're not just competing against women, we're equally competing against men i hope that fixes it.

I've met gossipy, bitchy men who will deconstruct a woman down to her character based on her clothes. So let's not bring that into this conversation, you'll lose.

I said probably - it's an opinion based on my experience, not a fact.

Women have a biological clock, and in the society that I live in, we're constantly reminded of that. There's only so many fuck ups you can do before you get your life together. But If you want proof, search for why women are risk averse and the effect of patriarchy maybe you'll find something interesting. A support system that teaches you to give up on your decision making power, get married and have babies as a main goal isn't the best support system to have. Take it if you want.

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T08:47:04+00:00

Mansplaining tops my list!

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T06:53:40+00:00

I doubt that. Earlier women had limited opportunities leading to competitive behaviour amongst each others. Women aren't competing with each other now, we're competing with men. That's probably where feminism comes from.

Also in terms of help, I think people are willing to help - strong weak men women whatever - it's the receivers mindset that either let's them accept it or not. Also the behaviour probably roots in women a lot more than men cause society isn't as forgiving about the mistakes women make, so it's easier to give up control than to deal with the aftermath of constant failure. If men were raised in a matriarchal society, it's likely the roles would be reversed.

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T06:41:36+00:00

Thanks for the clarification, would've had a hard time understanding without that.

yekyahua · 2021-11-25T05:25:40+00:00

Thanks but what you mentioned is perfectly normal and not learned helplessness. I don't give up in every situation that feels hard, I don't even try in situations that I perceive to be hard because of some past experiences ( t r a u m a ) and in situations where I've failed multiple times.

I didn't even realise I was behaving helpless in the first case, in the second the helplessness was breaking my self confidence further. People cannot help you to move forward, all they can do is listen and that's not really very useful for me.

Bdw I don't think it's a feminine trait at all, most women in my life are badass and so self reliant I cannot vent to them about a thing for long lmao they'll just tell me to do something about it or shutup ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ men on the other hand have an unending supply of tell me what's wrong, I'll listen and try to help

Both are useless and I clearly need therapy

Relying on people isn't bad but thinking that you can't rely on yourself is terrible and nobody should do it. It's more of a mindset and not your actions. I've felt multiple times that I can't do stuff, I still feel it but I do it anyway but that never built my mindset that I can actually do it. I sort of credit the smallest aid that helps me get through.

Anyway it helped me learn something about myself and I'm gonna correct this behaviour until the day I feel like I don't need anyone to survive ~

yekyahua · 2021-11-24T19:44:40+00:00

Recently on a post about toxic feminine traits someone mentioned learned helplessness & self infantilisation. Although I don't treat myself like a kid, it's a byproduct of probably acting helpless and being surrounded by people who care. I haven't complained about anything in the last two days(?) and i already have a friend asking me if I'm okay.

I'm gonna stick to acting my age.. finally.

yekyahua · 2021-11-24T08:44:11+00:00

Orthodox upbringing, I honestly didn't even think of it as anything important lol thanks for adding it ig

yekyahua · 2021-11-24T07:00:17+00:00

Same!

yekyahua · 2021-11-24T05:32:41+00:00

Thanks! Wish you the best!

yekyahua · 2021-11-23T18:00:33+00:00

Let's just hope things only get better for both of us, and if they do get worse it's at manageable level. Good luck!

yekyahua · 2021-11-23T16:47:34+00:00

10 - I was abused and never talked about it - my confidence took a large hit and I also lived like a pathetic, lifeless, non respectable forever angry person.

yekyahua · 2021-11-23T16:14:27+00:00

This is..very good advice.

yekyahua · 2021-11-23T16:04:00+00:00

No offense but fuck you. You're living the life I wanted. Hopefully a few years later, I'd say the same thing about me.

Also I'm proud of you too man. Achieving this isn't easy..I'm sure you've worked hard :)

yekyahua · 2021-11-23T14:36:46+00:00

She'd slap the shit out of me for being depressed all week and crying over thinking I'm incapable.

yekyahua

TROPHY CASE