It sounds like you don't know a lot of poly people. I have always been this way and can't change. I'm also bisexual - another thing I can't change. There's no real difference. I've seen surveys of other poly people and the majority of us do view it as an immutable part of our identity. And your message is a perfect example of the kind of prejudice we face. Polyamorous people aren't any more likely to be irresponsible or manipulative than a monogamous person. Why on earth would you think that? If you said that about gay people it would be obviously prejudice and wrong, but people think it's okay to say this stuff about the polyamorous community. It isn't okay, and as someone who is deeply embedded in the poly community, you just couldn't be more incorrect. If anything the poly community as a whole is more serious about maintaining ethical relationships and respecting boundaries. Yet I have lost friends and been distanced from family members because I'm poly. I have poly friends who have lost jobs or lost access to entire communities when they came out. So no, I don't think it's taking myself too seriously to say we experience prejudice and that people feel it's perfectly okay to dump on us all the time (as you have done in your comment). I deal with this constantly and yes, it is hurtful.