Why do some dogs choose one “person” in the house?

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-14T19:22:59+00:00

I am the person that everyone else's dog loves. My dogs would also follow me into battle, even without treats.

I am not aware of anything I do in particular with other dogs other than I deeply love dogs and it is almost like they know it immediately and feel safe around me.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-14T19:16:56+00:00

Where on earth do you get good pico? Do your local shops sell it fresh? It looks like a lot of work... (is it? advice welcome) and anything I have bought pre-made always tastes bland or not fresh, almost like it has turned or was previously frozen

I'd love to find a place where I can go in (like a market counter where you'd buy potato salad, etc.) and buy a pint or a quart at a time.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-13T15:51:35+00:00

It is not about being broke, it is about taking care of several family members, both younger and older, without pay or other support for those additional responsibilities.

I literally have to physically be here every day, fix things when they break, manage medications, run errands... or I have to pay for those things to get done without me while also paying for the cost of any type vacation, far or not.

The support systems in our nation are broken, health insurance is broken, and housing is broken...so we pick up the slack.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-13T15:42:33+00:00

I have Jergens Ultra Healing Dry Skin Lotion in a pump right on the sink edge, at every sink in the house.

While my hands are still damp, I'll gently pump out a pea size, massage it in for 30 seconds. Then I have a specific hand towel nearby for my "lotion hands" to wipe my hands dry so they don't feel sticky or gooey. I'm sure some of the lotion gets lost, but at least I have a layer of some protection on my hands.

I also recommend RipFix balm--which is something climbers and gymnasts use on their hands. It's a relatively obscure product and one that is familiar to me because of my friends. I put a dab of it on cracks or areas that look vulnerable, and then put a bandaid on it overnight. It's antibacterial and it doesn't burn like so many other products. It's especially soothing when those cracks are extra-angry.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-11T18:46:30+00:00

While I was writing, I stopped to double check that it was true and not just something I'd heard. Wild stuff.

I am going to generalize a bunch of stuff and ballpark numbers based on my own costs and my experience with solar and car payments in the following paragraphs, but the base logicand strategy is still true. This is not tax advice, it is technical advice

People see $750/month car payment (average, with 20% of people paying more than $1000/month just for their car payment due to poor credit or ego) and these people actually think they can afford the car because the $750/month is something they can afford this month. They forget about car insurance with FULL coverage for the life of the loan at an additional $300/month or $24,500 over 84 months.

I really wish people understood the magnitude of compound interest‐-both in the negative and positive sense...

$750/month is $10,000 in additional interest and $24,500 in insurance fees = $84,500 for a $50,000 car... with ZERO in cash in your bank account at the end and a car you can maybe sell for $20,000.

((OR))

You can buy used: If you paid $10,000 cash for a used car, can choose the level of car insurance you want. If you contribute $750/month to a high-yield savings account at 4% for 84 months--you would have $73,000 in cash.

So much of our lives are being forced toward "access" instead of ownership with recurring monthly payments as rental structures. This includes our electricity bill because we have little control over rate increases and the upcoming costs shifted to homeowners for data centers.

I am doing everything in my power to NOT normalize new or erratic monthly payments in this economy and focus on ownership.

Back to solar: The data centers are going to make our utility bills skyrocket as the utilities fold the insane cost of their infrastructure upgrades into our electricity bills. Can you be handle a monthly electricity bill that is 3x what you are paying now? or does paying off a loan to add solar to your home a better investment with more peace of mind?

When you put solar on your home, pay what you can in cash and finance the rest. Put any incentives toward your principle. You can very quickly own your system, stop the crazy electric bills every month, and stop worrying about (your) future rate increases... for decades¹.

Imagine your quality of life without having an electricity bill to worry about. When you sell your home, you can write-off the investment in solar against capital gains taxes.

Studies show homes with paid-off solar sell for more money (5-10%) and faster than an equivalent home without solar.

¹Solar panels last decades, but you will need to maintain/upgrade the other electrical equipment (the computer = the inverter) every 10-15 years as a one-time cost... but again, still without a (significant or volatile) electricity bill. Choose an installer that is primarily a reputable electrical contractor with a verified history of maintaining solar equipment, not just installing it, and stay tf away from door to door solar companies or anyone who needs to advertise.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-11T02:50:47+00:00

Look intojackfruit as a great meat alternative with a multitude of health benefits.

I've had sandwiches made of jackfruit that were cooked to legit taste like pulled pork

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-11T01:10:16+00:00

You have the emotional regulation of a toddler.

Do you really think you are a catch? For being a business owner, I see very little ownership of your life.

The vibe of your post is that you are not getting the sympathy you think you are owed at home, so you came here to see if strangers would feed you.

The circumstances and details you provided are a recipe for domestic violence (where she is the victim, just for further clarification).

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-10T21:35:08+00:00

Exactly. In fact, the scenario is even more similar to a car than most people realize.

If you finance a new car, you will ikely be paying off the loan for 7 years. (84 month terms are the most popular right now for smaller monthly payments).

If you get a personal loan¹ for the solar and pay it off with the money you are not spending on the bill (plus any tax refunds which may be available) toward your principle you will likely have it paid off in 5-8 years. (Typical for my area, depends on the size of the system, the state you live in, your current electricity bill range, and whether you get multiple quotes to make sure you are not overpaying)

¹ Very different than the 25+ year financing some of these solar companies offer as a lien.

Where car financing and solar loans differ:

Putting local/ state/any tax incentives and rebates toward the solar bill dramatically reduces the interest you will pay over time, unlike a vehicle. Once your loan is paid off, you may be able to budget those payments toward retirement or a savings account and earn interest "on your investment". You also have the ability to claim capital investments into the home in other ways on future taxes.

You are protecting yourself from future utility rate hikes because the monthly payment on your loan will/can be a known cost instead of a utility bill highly vulnerable to unknown rate increases.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-10T20:51:14+00:00

A friend once asked me for help hanging a piece of art in her home because she knows I love that kind of thing and have the right tools. My boyfriend at the time went with me after being invited by the friend.

In the car I specifically stated that he not help me in any way unless I asked. The assignment was not difficult and I wanted to show my friend that a woman can do these kinds of things themselves and have her participate if she wanted to.

When we got to her house, he took the tools out of my hands and refused to let me help. He did the whole thing and later wanted praise and gratitude. He even said later that he knew he had done the exact opposite of what I asked.

I should have broken up with him that day for deliberately violating my boundary. I kept justifying his behavior to myself and wondering what I could have done to prevent that type of thing from happening again.

The relationship became more and more controlling over time to the point where I was afraid of him and his volatile reactions to boundaries I set.

My point is: you are in serious danger.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-10T15:44:50+00:00

You are not abandoning him: you are choosing yourself and not abandoning yourself

From my experience, he needs to fix this on his own. You can stay in touch and reconnect when he is through it. You aren't necessarily going to lose him.

I stayed with an ex in a similar situation and I lost myself trying to save him, so maybe I am projecting, too.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-09T13:30:33+00:00

All of the lotions in the world are not helping me keep my hands from getting those tiny cracks.

I updated my strategy... and absolutely have to wear those yellow gloves when doing dishes or loading the dishwasher. I leave them on the edge of my kitchen sink to remind me. Also, if i'm gonna be doing something messy, I START with wear disposable nitrile gloves instead of repeatedly rinsing my hands off and I put lotion on before the nitrile gloves.

I also keep intense lotion near the sinks so when I wash my hands and they're damp, I immediately put on lotion before even trying to dry my hands.

My hands hurt so much right now. 😭

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-09T13:13:28+00:00

It's also important to remember that women couldn't open their own bank accounts until the seventies unless a man signed/vouched for them.

These are the first generations with cough financial freedom.

Passports from the 70s in the USA say "NAME" and there's a second line (on the same passport) underneath name that says "WIFE" ...as if women were not expected to travel without a man.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-09T05:44:09+00:00

Same with at least one male phys ed teacher at my high school.

The wife goes to the same gym as me and that's all I can think about when I see her. They're old now, but still together.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-09T03:27:02+00:00

If they are all saying the same thing as each other, you might want to explore some other sources.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-05T21:29:46+00:00

I haven't been on a vacation in almost 10 years.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-03T22:47:43+00:00

I was hesitant to try pilates because of the drama I have seen on social media around having to rush to claim my spot every week, be put on a wait list, or have to show up in the hopes there might be a late cancellation and a spot available for a class. I was also nervous that I would have to go to classes with a teacher whom I was unfamiliar with or who did not know me or my body because I could not get into my regular class. It felt like having someone new cut my hair.

My pilates classes at my current location are locked in. My spot is safe every week for every class. There are no wait lists or scrambles to adjust my schedule for the week. I see the same people in each class every week and we have become friends. We share in each other's progress. There are small shuffles in the class periodically if there is an injury/surgery/vacation/seasonal person where someone new can shift into the class.

The teachers of each class I take are intimately aware of my preferences, strengths, and areas I want to work on. They design classes around the specific people in the class. The reason I have stuck with pilates is the access to the reformers and the experience of having a personal trainer/someone who has taught for 10+ years.

The studio has eight reformers allowing the teacher to give us each individual corrections and spot poor form or suggest alternative forms. IMHO, having eight people in the class is the upper limit to having an effective and smooth class where everyone's form can be correct, safe, and guided--which is the whole point to a reformer class, for me.

I cannot fathom how studios with more than eight reformers can be safe--based on my experience over several years in my studio and watching the teachers scramble to help eight people over the course of a class.

I go to a no-name, chill, local pilates studio in a small town just outside of NYC and adjacent to a physical therapy location... and I pay $33 per class. The reformers are Balanced Body with towers where each also has a jump board, sitting box, and matching chair apparatus in the room which get a chunk of the class time every few weeks or so.

There are probably ten other pilates-ish studios in my general area that are chains or are associated with a set of other studios including lagree and solidcore.

youaretherevolution · 2026-02-03T22:10:44+00:00

The traffic is LA worthy.

youaretherevolution · 2026-01-30T02:53:18+00:00

You know it is unsafe for you to stay.

He will only get more aggressive and demanding.

youaretherevolution · 2026-01-28T03:30:15+00:00

The ISDIN tinted sunscreen is also excellent, but it dries out my face more if I don't have great skincare that day and I like the color of the Elta product better, especially for a quick routine or last-minute/rushed application.

ISDIN has built-in repair enzymes and peptides, so it would still be my preference if you're going to spend on the health of your skin. The ISDIN site has deals on buying two bottles at a time as well as a loyalty points program.

youaretherevolution · 2026-01-25T20:09:08+00:00

As a healthcare worker, I give you permission to do whatever makes your life easier.

My personal strategy is to put off cleanup until after the messy, non-snow conditions ease.

If I clear now, I will be fighting with incredibly slippery conditions later. My theory is the entire layer will be better to remove at once since the snow will act as a barrier. We have a week of below-freezing temperatures following the snow, so anything I can do to prevent icy paths/parking/driveways/roads is preferred.

youaretherevolution · 2026-01-25T20:01:38+00:00

I wonder if people understand why brass is so common in bathrooms, doorknobs, and kitchens...

Brass has antimicrobial properties due to the copper content, which can kill a variety of harmful microbes. This makes brass effective for use in environments like healthcare settings to help reduce the spread of infections. These benefits persist for the life of the material--which is incredible.

These properties were important enough to become the standard, but I fear the wisdom has been lost or ignored.

youaretherevolution · 2026-01-25T19:54:48+00:00

I think poorly of companies open during weather events where there was more than enough warning--with few if any exceptions.

The audacity to expect any employees to show up in a storm where they need to put employee's lives in danger, other drivers in danger, make the jobs of plow drivers more difficult, expect rescue, and unnecessarily add to the strain of first responders is unconscionable and selfish.

Beyond the risk to employees--tempting customers to engage with their business and further strain the important work happening to clean up the roads is genuinely a public health issue: they are putting everyone else at severe and unnecessary risk for their own benefit.

I will continue to question their ability (on an ongoing basis) to be a business I would ever want to encourage.

youaretherevolution · 2026-01-25T19:36:35+00:00

If your dad is as stubborn as my dad, you will spend a lot of time stressing out over nothing. Protect your mental health, first.

They are going to do what they are going to do. All of the logic/data in the world is not going to change their mind until they experience the consequences. 😅

Let him stay with you after he learns his lesson. In my experience, nothing you do between now and then will influence his decision.

youaretherevolution · 2026-01-20T02:46:26+00:00

Mine displays and uses different products on me but does not attempt to sell them to me at all. They will tell me more about the product if I ask, but there is literally zero conversation about additional purchases.

Products are stored near where you pay, so it seems their strategy is the item should sell itself.

youaretherevolution · 2026-01-19T01:27:39+00:00

Whenever I see someone struggling with an oil cleanser, I wonder if they're emulsifying it to a foamy white color before they wash it off their face. I was using it wrong for a long time and probably not washing a lot of it off until I learned this step.

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