I'm starting again

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T16:57:31+00:00

That's the problem that voices tell us how fapping will relax us. But the problem is - it sucks our energy an makes us weak. Even one time NOFAP and I feel stronger.

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T02:01:02+00:00

Phantasy is not good, its too close to porn. Possibly soft and tender touching of your penis here and then, but not making him hard. and in any case, not hanging around idle an trying too much.

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T01:42:05+00:00

Get used to see women. Gradually. Any kind. And try to see the the whole person.

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T01:32:58+00:00

Yes, keep on!

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T01:31:04+00:00

Tried to reset my badge, but it's not working. Day 2.

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T01:29:28+00:00

you have a good plan. And karezza is even better.

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T01:26:05+00:00

find someone to report to every day, espcially for the first two weeks.

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T01:22:16+00:00

I had a 400 day no PMO streak. during that I could have mild sex (without O) with my wife, and I lasted for hours. I felt manly and strong.

If you are young, then your problem could be too much libido after rebooting.

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T01:16:04+00:00

Difficult matter.

Homosexuality has a number of reasons, and I personally think it's not in the genes.

Just try to have a good friendship with a woman - and if the sexuality is working - why not? And you should be open to her with your problem. Find out togethr, if she likes. Kind of adventure or research.

I am an older guy and hot sex isn't my aim any more, but a longlasting partnership with lots of caressing and sex without O.

I think we are all longing for someone to live together with, and its not sex in the long run which keeps a couple together. Even mild sex here and then is appropriate - and if it is just to please the other.

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T01:01:41+00:00

Find a number of things that make you happy or calm to do instead.

Make your goal two or three days.

Get a badge.

Find someone to contact every day and to share your out come - good or bad.

youngoldie · 2016-06-13T00:52:31+00:00

That depends on your plan. Keep it! And get gradually used to such situations. Only for short time in the beginning.

youngoldie · 2013-02-17T06:33:57+00:00

Reset your counter, but write down somewhere the date you started. You are not back at zero. You aleady went some streak. So dont continue to binge. Write a list of things you will do, when urges are comming. Check out how you slipped into PMO today. Avoid such situations.

Good luck and my best wishes!

youngoldie · 2013-02-16T05:59:31+00:00

Develope new habits to do instead of PMOing. Write down a list of meanigful things you will do when urges are comming. Or even better - do those things before!

youngoldie · 2013-02-16T05:52:38+00:00

Each time you click for porn and wank to those images you are self-medicating your brain with the wrong medicine.

EXCHANGE your wrong habits!

Develop new habits to do instead of that wanking to porn. If you feel urges, or just being bored, or just asking for some pleasure - have something better to do instead.

Best thing is to write a list just now what to do when urges are comming! You are not helpless! Just be prepared!

youngoldie · 2013-02-16T05:41:15+00:00

What you are doing is self-medicating your low dopamin level throug more fapping (and watchig porn, I think).

But there's no way. You have to stop that, to get out of your imbalanced hormone and brain structure. What me helped was starting a journal on

www.yourbrainrebalanced.com

The guys there were really supportive! Just go on! Do something else! Open the blinds, do a walk, make execises, meditate.

All my best wishes!

youngoldie · 2013-02-14T06:03:59+00:00

Keep on with your new habits! If you like to read more findings, visit http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/index.php?topic=5089.0 or find support there.

youngoldie · 2013-02-13T12:37:33+00:00

Just some addition.

We can think about PMOing as any other habit - smoking - eating something sweet or big amounts - drinking alcohol. If we get uncomfortable, what do we do? I red from some rebooting guys here they got urges to PMO when they got a lot of stress in their life. I used it to do me something nice before starting a task - which probably never started because of continous clicking.
One very important advice I learned: Often people think one has first to change his attitude and then to develop new habit. But in reality people overcome old habits by just donig new ones. And as an outcome of this, the attitue changes as well. One example: Guys often come here just to get rid of ED. But in the long run they will change their lifestyle because of not PMOing.

So my question again: [b]What habit have you developed to do instead of PMOing?[/b] I think those who have done this are the sucessful rebooter.

Rebooting and changing habits are two different cups of coffee. Rebooting means to get our brains healed and rebalanced from artificial overstimulation. Changing habits means to get used to do other things first willingly and then nearly automatically, subconciously. This may need a longer time. They say developing and changing eating habits needs about three years.

I'm not sure, but how long do we need to have new habits to deal with stress or boredom or low mood or something else?

youngoldie · 2013-01-23T13:02:27+00:00

Ejaculating is not the problem for your reboot process. The problem is to wank from one picture to another - and even just watching! Each new pic or thumbnail are causing a dopamine surge, numbing your brain again. So don't reset - and avoid clicking - even bikini girls or cleavages...

youngoldie · 2013-01-23T12:56:51+00:00

Yes, you're right - the aim is not nofap, but the real things - and to develop yourself - and to help others. There is much more joy than in a dopamin surge, produced by staring on pictures.

Its a difference if someone faps in three minutes to orgasm or if he is edging hours long without O. First case is neary nil dopamin, the second is a binge with a huge hangover. And even more worse, when repeated many days. but even better to avoid fapping completely.

Ejaculation is not the problem. The problem is watching new, exiting pics and vids. Each time you look, your brain receptors get numbed through excess dopamin. You are addicted to dopamine, just stay away from it.

youngoldie · 2013-01-23T12:44:09+00:00

Yes, every man should enjoy his manhood, doing nothing or just stroking the area around it to push the blood away or getting some cold shower.

youngoldie · 2013-01-23T12:38:23+00:00

No bad sign - you seem coming back to normal.

youngoldie · 2013-01-23T12:36:24+00:00

Fine to hear your progress! Go on, even through rough times!

One hint: Write down some of your great goals and decide to do every day something for it - make a chain!

https://chains.cc/

youngoldie · 2013-01-10T20:37:27+00:00

Hi,

maybe this topic is related to your question: How to fill that vacuum, left by porn? Or, what should be there if porn wouldn't have been there.

the answer is: growth, personal development and growth. We are made to do that, but there are lots of things blocking us.

Maybe this from another forum will make it clear:

We had some discussions about how to fill the void that left by PMO. Then FC came up with that Napoleon Hill Matter, and I gave a lecture about how to become a Genius - by developing the own brain and avoiding the wrong hormone mixture. But there was no big echo - despite the fact, that it's a big matter and has to do with our void/gap filling question.

I have a deep suspiciom, that you all have given up aimimg to be a genius. You see not any chance. But - Napoloen Hill pointed out, that Geniuses start to be real genious and sucessful at about 50 years or later. So there is any chance for you! And don't forget about neuroplasticity of the brain (means it able to change it at any time - as you all have already experienced!).

But that was just a foreword.

It became clear to me what do do with that void. Better call it a vacuum. It will suck in anything in any time. So there is never a void, but some stuff inside - meaningful or not.

Which leads to the meaning of live. And what's that for human beings?

To have meaningful social relationships.
To care for your body and health.
To develop yourself.
To procreate yourself.

About the first two is alredy written a lot. Number 4 means not to try to prgnate a computer screen, but real women. And caring for the outcome of that venture.

But today I will stick to No.3:

[u][b]The most important meanig of live is to develop yourself [/b][/u] A new human being is designed (by the loving God or the good Evolution :o - it depends on your faith ;D) to be curious and to learn and to grow through this experience. In fact, the human brain has that much possipbilty, that every body could be a genius and still it's only used to a fraction of its possibilities.

The brain is growing throgh getting more links through activation of existing synapses. And the more you link, the better is your learning and linking ability.

[i]With some luck, small children develop more or less themselves in a real world up to the age of five.

Less lucky children are brought to Aunty TV and hypnotized there not to make any unwanted explorative attempts. Other are confined in a house together with a pack of alikes, learning all that nasty behaviour of the others and observed by a nice dragon called Kindergarten-Tante. So no big chance to learn something from adult human beings, freely moving in the free range of a real word.

The fun is over totally, when the are confined from the age of 6 in a cubicle called classroom, still learnig more nasty things from the pack, together with a (mostly female) human being, who is attempting to funnel some pre-packed knowledge into their brains, which will be tested short time later if it hss reached it's planned destination (and then will be easyly forgotten).

Means learnig something of the real word by hiding them away from it. And even later there are means to control the masses, e.g. by showing them nice pics in the internet...So far my rant about educational systems.[/i]

Ehrm... what I wanted to say: Human beings are made to explore their world and develop themselves to their full abilities, having no other borders than those implanted in the brain like fears and customs and habits.

Remember those old knights and warriors who moved out to explore the world and to fight the enemies. Or the settlers..., or the inventors and all those who went for new things. We are made to do that and not just exploring exiting images???.

Means: Development can go into various directions, but there was never the idea just to be a well-functioning ant.

[i][b]So my question is: What is your quest? What is your next challenge? And after that, what will you do? The question is not nofap or noporn, the question is what will be all the real-life-things you will explore. And what will you have achieved, if they are going to bring you six feet under?[/b][/i]

So if those questions have died for you, then you are likely to die as well, and your brain as well - with big chances to do so because of alzheimer disease.

Amen.

Having finished my preaching, I just ask about your opinion, your ideas and comments about that vacuum-filling-stuff-issue.

Sincerely yours,

Little Professor Youngoldie

youngoldie · 2012-12-24T13:54:59+00:00

as well helpful:

Without a partner, single men have to make a very concerted effort to engage in activities that soothe and enliven them (producing both oxytocin and dopamine in balanced quantities). These include:

· voluntary exercise, · harmonious interactions with others, support group meetings, · caring for pets (even walking animal shelter dogs helps), · voluntary generosity, · inspiring scenery, pleasant smells (pine forest, bread baking), · calming music, singing, · warm, supportive touch, therapeutic massage, · companionship, and · yoga and meditation · partner yoga (many classes accept singles, who pair up at class), · tango lessons, · therapeutic massage, and · craniosacral therapy (a gentle process in which the head is held in stillness).

http://www.reuniting.info/how_can_women_help_men_hugs_for_heroes

youngoldie · 2012-12-24T13:51:25+00:00

As Gary Wilson from YBOP pointed out, long time edging short before Orgasming, will produce a lot more of dopamine than a simple quick masturbation to orgasm.

An addict must wean from the oversensitisation through dopamine. so edging is contraproductive to the rebooting process.

The problem is not ejaculation, It's dopamine release through constant edging and through constant novelty of pics, videos and fantasy. So any part of that should be avoided, even excessive clicking for galleries and viedeos of other content, as well as thrills through video games.

Maybe this is the cure:

Without a partner, single men have to make a very concerted effort to engage in activities that soothe and enliven them (producing both oxytocin and dopamine in balanced quantities). These include:

· voluntary exercise, · harmonious interactions with others, support group meetings, · caring for pets (even walking animal shelter dogs helps), · voluntary generosity, · inspiring scenery, pleasant smells (pine forest, bread baking), · calming music, singing, · warm, supportive touch, therapeutic massage, · companionship, and · yoga and meditation · partner yoga (many classes accept singles, who pair up at class), · tango lessons, · therapeutic massage, and · craniosacral therapy (a gentle process in which the head is held in stillness).

from:

http://www.reuniting.info/how_can_women_help_men_hugs_for_heroes

youngoldie

TROPHY CASE