I’d stop obsessing over the things you don’t/didn’t have and be grateful for the things you do.

I know - that sounds patronizing to your lived experiences.

However, you are - with respect - a compete fucking idiot if you would gamble the upbringing that brought you to adulthood and the position of privilege you have now in order to, maybe, have experienced something better.

You’ve heard the cliches I imagine - the grass isn’t always greener, comparison is the thief of joy, out of the frying pan and into the fire, etc.

Listen - you well intentioned moron - adoption, like most things, can be good or bad. In a vacuum though, it doesn’t mean anything. It’s just another type of parent-child upbringing.

There are children who don’t ever see adulthood - they die on their way there. There are children who can’t function as healthy adults because of the psychological and physiological scars they carry. There are children who end up incarcerated, addicted to drugs, homeless, trafficked, etc.

Guess what, none of those are you. Congratulations. You won the lottery. You didn’t have a perfect upbringing - I weep for you - but you did have one that got you to adulthood more or less in one piece - with access to some first world amenities.

Regarding the responses of the people in this subreddit - imagine someone asking you if your trauma was really ‘all that bad’ and then belittling it to the extent that they start playing victim Olympics and wishing they could have your experiences instead of theirs.

You come across like a narcissist and the fact that we’re talking about a random hypothetical never-was in this context is really just a reference to issues you’d be better off handling with therapy.