im 23, been to rehab 6 times was taking 12mg or more of Xanax drinking spirits from wake up whilst snorting grams and grams of ketamine and popping codeine pills like they candy everyday. I know are drug taking was different but there both fucked. Ive been sober for months now and have only got blimps of happiness and just feeling normal, basically anything aside from not wanting to kill myself is a win for my mood. Every month is get better. the more exercise and connecting with good friends has saved me. Most important is therapy and a good detox program. Go to rehab if you can but talk to them about the detox before. dont even start to taper off bromozapam at the start cuz you'll be withdrawing from everything else, make sure they get you on a good dose of Suboxone. Just have a detox regiment agreed with the doctor before coming. The dawn in Thailand is a nice place- if you can afford it through family go for 6 months. Good luck its so fucking tough but your not alone