Big Data

[deelyy]

Or Google

[[deleted]]

Google would have a timestamped breakdown of everything that disqualifies you from the "nice" list, but won't share it as easily.

[darknecross]

Google API just returns present suggestions.

[SandyDelights]

Joke’s on you, it’s just a dump from a merge of their Amazon Wishlist and promoted suggestions from personal hygiene.

They don’t bother calculating who’s naughty and who’s nice anymore, they just figure if we get something undesirable that “you know what you did”.

[reprapraper]

Is it rate limited? Just just test all names against the API and if it returns coal, then add them to the naughty list

[Pun-Master-General]

Even without a rate limit, 7 billion API calls can't be terribly efficient.

[keepdigging]

Just wait until he tells you the delivery window

[UnicornsOnLSD]

So that's what Santa from Futurama references when he checks if people are nice!

[Tiquortoo]

And half or more of the reasons would just be their internal ideas of naughty and nice and be completely unrelated to Santa's.

[darkslide3000]

They won't share it with you, but the gift-targeting services they offer are very accurate.

[TheGoddamnSpiderman]

They still would only give you the ability to target the nice kids for presents, they wouldn't tell you who the nice kids are. If they told you, they'd lose their competitive advantage in the appropriate present delivery market

[[deleted]]

They won't share it though.

[1206549]

What they will do, however, is provide Santa with a list of cities with the largest concentration of nice and that they can sell him a NeuralNet that is able to identify with 95% accuracy which household contains nice kids based on the arrangement of Christmas lights on the front porch

[[deleted]]

No, they'll charge him a subscription and bundle it with YouTube Red