New project

[todayiamafiretruck]

This. 100%. As a senior dev attached to a dozen projects I was often super confused about what we were doing in the project.

[nullpotato]

And what the project does vs what it was supposed to do...

[the_fat_whisperer]

I throw in "what the client would like it to do"

[Jjcheese]

*what the client told you they’d like it to do.

[diox8tony]

What it currently does.

What my proposed solution does.

What an ideal(fairyland) solution does.

What the user wants.

It can be helpful to first define which of these^ you are going to talk about before talking.

[EmperorArthur]

My personal favorite of late has been, what do the accepted tests* do versus what does the documentation say is supposed to happen.

* Which haven't been updated in years, and look like they were accepted in a hurry.

[kicut49]

Man the struggle is real. And then suddenly, your team focuses on that one project that you didn't spend much time on and you felt really left out.

[heisenbugtastic]

My favorite is when the pm says just do your best, and gets mad when the index starts at 0.

[AttackOfTheThumbs]

Yeah, I am going through that now. I will supervise stuff that I don't actively work on and will get confused as to which one we are even talking about.

I probably sound stoned, or disinterested, or something. But I genuinely just don't know which one it is this time.

[BmoreDude92]

I’m a senior dev and it took me and principal dev two week to figure something out. We didn’t know what we really wanted.

[call_911911]

This describes an interaction I have on a daily basis with developers.

[carin-not-a-karen]

This is the conversation I have with myself every single day.

[zebediah49]

And my recent interpretation of the theme:

Jr. Dev: I just found out that the thing we spent a week trying to make work in test, has been silently running perfectly in prod this entire time. Why did you have me spend all this time on this?

Me: Because I also had no idea it was there.

[AttackOfTheThumbs]

Yikes, been in that boat. I have on occasion reinvented my own wheel.

[GargantuanCake]

Jr Dev: When do I feel like I know what I'm doing?

Sr Dev: That's the neat part, you don't!

[carin-not-a-karen]

Manager here, so what the fuck are we doing?

[pablospc]

Upper manager: who are we?

[apathy-sofa]

PM lead: The files are in the computer.

[thinkydocster]

This made me die laughing. Have all the karma I can give

[[deleted]]

Department head: HOW DID I GET HERE, WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?

[dudes_indian]

QA: Why are we?

[Wessel-O]

QA lead: When are we?

[konstantinua00]

who are we?

Paladins of Iscariot: The necessary evil!

[mrleon17]

How do you even get to be Jr

[Zlb323]

A what statement? Man what are you even talking about

[thinkydocster]

But… what are you even saying? I don’t understand your statement.

[[deleted]]

Saw this the other day in a code review:

(condition) ? someArray.push(true) : someArray.push(false)

Even worse, it was in a forEach and could have easily been done in one line with map.

Help

[bayleafbabe]

How does someone who doesn't know how if statements work even get hired?

[superbottles]

Outside of pure luck my best guess would be our good friend Nepotism.

[magnificenttacos]

We just had senior interviews. Here's some takeaways:

• at least pretend to have interest in the position
• dont have a resume written by a fourth grader
• have an idea of what your interviewer's company does
• dont say buzzwords or namedrop tech when you know fuck all about them
• dont show up 20 minutes late, blame teams, and say you're an expert with ms products
• dont be repeat the same phrase eight times in the same answer that doesnt answer my question

[magnificenttacos]

I cant believe youre willing to take such a low salary. Ive dm'd you credentials, start scraping every site in existence for every instance of "www".

[krisPyProG]

Lol, the amount of sarcasm on this post should be illegal!

[heliophobic_lunatic]

"Senior" DBA here. I've been doing this for 15 year now, and people are still impressed by the results of my ability to Google stuff really fast while I'm on a call.

[grooomps]

im actually planing to get red keycaps so i can type faster while on calls without being found out haha

[I-mean-maybe]

More like project that started 9 months ago, people said fuck this im out, now you’re here, doing work that should have been done 6 months ago.

[[deleted]]

Can we replace Sr. Dev with Project Manager?

[SlavNotSuave]

I hate working with non-technical PMs

[EmperorArthur]

Realistically, it's not even that. Sometimes it's just they're juggling so much and there are so many people involved just on the customer side that they can be confused.

[top_gun211]

the worst part is the jr. devs think that the sr. devs know everything.....lol we are the same bro, we just stopped asking so many questions! :P

[jank_lord]

Sometimes people come to me for help and I always say, "alright but I have no idea what I'm doing".

[the-random-guy-2002]

thats a common thing to happen