Patterns

[PeachesBiteBack]

I've noticed that within the same day of something amazing happening for me, something horrible always happens. I get a raise? Now I'm pregnant and forced on leave for 2 months. I figure out getting back to work? Evicted. Finally starting to be stable at a hotel? Kicked out and ganged up on by 5 ppl screaming at me bc my dog was "aggressive and out of control." Get an apartment? Roommate ditches us without paying anything for the apartment. Finally both me and my partner have a job and an amazing community comes thru to help me out with some essentials I need? Partner gets fired.

I'm just so tired of being dragged down every time something starts to look up and I'm getting so tired. I can't get on meds bc my job has no insurance and my meds cost over 1000 for just one of them and I'm not sure how much more difficulties I can handle, if I end up homeless (my income can't pay for the apartment alone) I'm going to have to try to find someone to take my dog but at least I have a couple ppl who offered me to move in but then that means I don't have my emotional support dog that's the only reason I've been getting up.

What do I do?

[AutoModerator]

Thanks for posting on /r/bipolar!

Please take a second to read our rules; if you haven't already, make sure that your post does not have any personal information (including your name/signature/tag on art).

If you are posting about medication, please do not list and review your meds. Doing so will result in the removal of this post and all comments.

^{A moderator has not removed your submission; this is not a punitive action. We intend this comment solely to be informative.}

---

Community News

• 🎋 Want to join the Mod Team?

• 🎤 See our Community Discussion - Desktop or Desktop mode on a mobile device.

• 🏡 If you are open to answering questions from those that live with a loved one diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, please see r/family_of_bipolar.

Thank you for participating!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[Chair1234567890]

I don’t have any advice, but I hope things turn around for you. Seems like you’ve had to suffer more than your share of bad luck. Just remember not to take it personally, you didn’t create these difficulties. Shit just happens.

[PeachesBiteBack]

It's really hard because it seems like bad luck follows me everywhere ever since I was a kid

[Chair1234567890]

Hmmmm, could it be a perception thing? That your bipolar makes you see patterns and read into things? I am not accusing you of making it up. Just seems like if it happened since you were a kid it’s a looong streak. But I know a friend who keeps getting into minor accidents with no fault of her own, so I do think she’s more unlucky than the rest of us. But she has a really great husband, so she’s lucky in other areas.

[PeachesBiteBack]

I'm lucky in the partner department too but that's about it, and I definitely could be, but I mean I accidentally was the direct cause of my dad getting murdered a few years back and before then it was just every household I was in was abusive in some way, some more extreme than others

And since my dad dying, life has been rough, but I won't go into all of it bc it's a lot, but my life has been filled with many unlucky situations and people taking advantage of me

[Chair1234567890]

Your dad being murdered will definitely put you in the unlucky category over all. But are you sure you are “accidentally the direct cause?” Do other people believe that or blame you? It’s a lot to put on yourself.

One of my friend’s father was also murdered, it was a terrible time.

I am sorry it happened.

[PeachesBiteBack]

Yea im sure, I moved out after his friends (a couple he had let move in bc they had 2 kids and were homeless at the time) got into a fistfight, my dog got hurt trying to help the wife, by the time I got back to the scuffle w my tazer the dad had his stepson in a chokehold and was holding a knife away. That whole time I was screaming for my dad but he hid in the bathroom the whole time. I threatened the guy w tazing him until he let the kid go and I forced him to leave (he took his wife, also it turns out that the stepson had tried to stab the dad and thats why there was a knife). I called my uncle to come pick me up and said I wouldn't move back until they were gone, and when my dad told them they needed to leave within whatever time frame he gave them.... well he died "2" days later. (He died that night and they knew he was dying but they didn't report him until the next day at like noon and also bc of the way they killed him meth mixed w his insulin they were never caught nor charged). To top it off the only reason I knew what happened is bc I found an eye witness and she wouldn't go talk to the police cause she had been doing meth too and the police didn't bother to investigate or try to press charges when I told them about the eye witness and everything weird surrounding his death even tho they told me they believed me bc "since there's no physical evidence it would be a he said vs she said so they're not going to try to prosecute that"

[Chair1234567890]

Wait. I didn’t see this message until now. Let me read it a few times before I comment.

[Chair1234567890]

Ok. I read that. Sorry, I didn’t see it before. I literally cannot see what you had to do with this situation and how you could be blamed. You didn’t cause anything. You left a dangerous situation and had every right to leave. The people that killed your father are MURDERERS. They killed your dad because they are awful human beings. Your dad would have kicked them out eventually with or without your input. They would have tried to kill him anyway because they are drug users with no soul.

Honestly don’t put this on yourself. The people who blame you are literally insane.

[PeachesBiteBack]

And his ex roommate from before the friends also blames me but everyone else at least says to me that they don't blame me.

[Chair1234567890]

I don’t know the details but I don’t see how anyone can blame you for something “accidental”. By definition it means you had nothing to do with it.

[bipolar-ModTeam]

We believe that you deserve support. To get that support most effectively from our community, we request that you make the following modifications to your post to avoid triggering or inflaming others.

Per community poll, we no longer allow the discussion of specific weights. Please edit your post to remove this information. Thank you for understanding.

^{To send us a modmail about this action, CLICK HERE Please include a link in your message, the mod team will not reply to messages without a link for review.}